Heidi Montag Claims That The Recent Unflattering Internet Photos of Her Butt Have Been Photoshopped or At Least Retouched
LOS ANGELES - Heidi Montag told a Los Angeles entertainment publication that the recent photos of her derriere that are starting to appear on the Internet under such name categories as "Booty," "Bahookie," "Buns," "Badonkadonk," and "Bottom" have all...
Read full storyMore Spoof Writers beginning to walk upright...Scientific and Spoof Worlds both astounded
The Scientific World and, indeed the World of Spoofers, have been shaken by the finding that more and more Spoof Writers are beginning to walk UPRIGHT. Fans of Spoof Writers have been following their 'favourites' and taking photographs and video...
Read full storyMiniaturization Escalates with Obesity
Scientists have confirmed that ongoing successes in miniaturization of electronics have been given a boost by increased rates of obesity that only now are being accounted for. Some recent technological breakthroughs in fact have been attributed en...
Read full storyShylock Humes: The hound of the Basketvills: Part almost the last
After a good nights sleep, the three men emerged from the dank gloom of the inn. Eager to get going, Graves hailed the stable lad and requested thier horses be saddled. The stable lad spoke. "You ate them last night" "Wot do you mean, we ate them last night?" ask Graves. "You ordered steak and chippings didnt you? Where do you think we got the steak from, Tesco?" laughed the lad. "Lets go...
Read full storyA Full-Figured Paris Hilton Responds To Pregnancy Questions
SAN PAULO, Brazil - Hollywood socialite and queen of Hollywood's glitter glam world pranced up and down the runway at The Annual San Paulo Fashionista Fashion Show Extravaganza which was held at The Brazil Nuts Convention Auditorium. The famous bl...
Read full storyAdam Lambert Jerks Off--Fans Stymied and Stimulated
LOS ANGELES, CA (ABSNN) -- Adam Lambert is hospitalized in an undisclosed LA hospital after what physicians termed "a masturbatory accident." Apparently, and according to people who have no reason for knowing anything at all about the former America...
Read full storyCold Fusion Returns
Those scientist guys Ferrante and Telcher were famous for a brief moment when they created energy from nothing and called it Cold Fusion. The world was amazed and anxious for the near future when energy was free. Other scientists however were...
Read full storySpoof Writer Ventures Into 'Exercise'
BIRMINGHAM, ENG. - Spoofer Inhopeless has ventured into the activity known as Exercise. According to his brother, Exercise cannot be done using the internet, however the word has been extensively Googled (TM) by Inhopeless. Exercise apparentl...
Read full storyThis Is The Headline of the Article, Which Appears in the Article
BIRMINGHAM, ENG. - A story written by Spoofer Inhopeless uses self-referential humour in order to gain thumbs-up for the story. He has aptly called it This Is The Headline of the Article, Which Appears in the Article. The article follows the id...
Read full storyRoyal Altercation At Palace Leaves William 'Furious' And Kate Middleton 'Extremely Upset'
Prince William is said to be 'furious' after his grandmother, Queen Elizabeth II, allegedly upset his wife-to-be, the commoner Kate Middleton. The row took place in Buckingham Palace late one evening, sources say, and resulted in Miss Middleton st...
Read full storyRevenge of the Pizza Delivery Boy
There was once a boy who lived in Bristol and worked as a pizza delivery driver. He had a snazzy silver scooter and a special carrier pannier at the back. Once or twice a day he would deliver a pepperoni or margherita or Hawaiian pizza to 46 Cannynge Road. Some days if the punters were pushing the boat out they would have anchovies and capers as well as a filled crust as well as a garlic bread o...
Read full storyMurdoch's Cry for Help
It had to happen. My rise to fame is mind blowing (at least I think that's what it is although this stuff I'm smoking could be giving me schizophrenia). Now, after sorting out Cameron's problems in my brief stay as his Communications Director and giving 'The Two Heads' some timely advice I've got the BIG one - yes it's Rupert 'the Bear' Murdoch!!! I had this strange message to meet an old Au...
Read full storyJulian Assange to Wed Catherine Elizabeth "Kate" Middleton
London, England - Kate Middleton, the daughter of Bertie Middleton and Elizabeth Middleton of Dorney, Buchinghamshire, is to be married April 29, 2011 to Julian Assange, the son of Louise Assange and Doctor Bud Assange of Mendax, Queensland. Ms Mi...
Read full storyWho is Behind the Egyptian Uprising?
A fresh headache for International Rescue is the spread of riots in Egypt and other areas of the Middle East. Speaking from his headquarters at an unknown place somewhere in this world, it is thought, former Army Major General Battersea-Smythe (kn...
Read full storyRevenge of The Plod
If you go down to Clifton Woods today you are sure of a big surprise. The Plod is there to check and compare the clues that they have already bodged now that Vincent is in the slammer. The Plod have botched both DNA and other circumstantial evidence. Coppers have plodded in their size 10s all over the garden in Cannynge Road and have churned up the mud withpolice issue boots and have put up lo...
Read full storyA day in the life of Fug
I get up in the morning at 9am, this is difficult for me, because I do not wake up until 10am. Once awake, I throw my legs out of the bed, and call the dog to bring them back. The false limbs fitted, I go down stairs, usually, head first, I must get that carpet fixed. In the kitchen, I have a vast selection of cereal. If only I could find them. Breakfast over, always over me, I have the shak...
Read full storyQuatermass and the Spoof writers: Part 1
At 3am, Quatermass and his team assembled outside Oxford Street tube station. He had made it clear to all concerned, that some of them may not return. With the two remaining team members, Quatermass began the descent down the now lifeless escalator stairs. A voice cried out. "Hey, where am yu dam ticket mun!" Quatermass turned to the ticket inspector. "Are you on fukin overtime or wat?" The...
Read full storyHow to Make a Simple Trap for Animals
Follow my instructions and you can then go out and catch animals like some sort of modern-day Buffalo Bill. What you'll need: - String or twine. - A springy twig or sapling. - Some bits of branch or wood. - Some smaller twigs. - A knife (for cutting) - Human hands. (for doing stuff and scratching backside) - Human brain. (for thinking) - The patience to even bother. Now, this snare...
Read full storyWheelie bin theory suggests Vincent Tabak 'accomplice' may be a woman
Bristol - (Bin Bags): The body-in-a-suitcase theory was losing ground this weekend as Jo Yeates forensic sleuths admitted impounding a recycling smart bin. Layout pics of the Canynge Road apartment block communal areas show a waste container stora...
Read full storyA Winter's Tale - in Clifton, Bristol
The landlord of 46 Cannyng Road was standing at the front of his palatial mansion. It was a cold, snowy winter's day. The snowflakes swirled around the large Bath-stone mansion. Jeffries was shoveling the snow away from the blacktop drive. He was feeling good; the mansion glowed with festive lights from the Christmas trees inside. He enjoyed the feeling of festive happiness that only a Friday...
Read full storyChavs Found to Be Remaining Neanderthals
BIRMINGHAM - A new report by the University of Birmingham has found out that homo stultus (common chav), is a 99% descendent of the Neanderthals. "Yeah," said Dr. Bill Bates, "one of our colleagues got into a fight with a chav - and won. There was...
Read full story'Kate & Wills Condoms' come in small, medium and psychic!
London - (Tears Before Beditme!): The newly launched royal wedding souvenir three-packs come with fortune cookie-esque slips of paper offering matrimonial tips. These include 'Phantom pregnancy: your boyfriend's a ghost!' and 'Should've seen it co...
Read full storyGlenn Beck Hoax! Is Really Glenda Beckster!
A major news service has just released several hundred pages from Wikileaks indicating that Glenn Beck is, in fact, a female named Glenda Beckster! The news comes at time when Glenn Beck has risen to the top of the conservative media and is the darli...
Read full storyAdopt a Sparrow - don't let the Bustard Bastards rid Britain of Sparrows - Justin Beiber to join campaign
Newspaper Headlines tell of the humble house sparrow's probable demise should the proposal to let the bustard population rise in Britain be realized. We interviewed many people on the streets of London and discovered that not many people know what...
Read full storyBBC Saturday Kitchen Ends In Brawl
Popular BBC cookery show Saturday Kitchen ended in chaos today when punches were thrown as the final credits rolled. The fracas broke out over the show's regular Omelette Challenge spot, during which the two guest chefs have to make an omelette ag...
Read full storyNew Maths for Schools
Education Minister Michael Gove is introducing a new way of teaching Maths. He explained to Parliament : 'I went into a school yesterday and asked a child what 2 and 2 was. He said it a short skirt used in Ballet. I ask you, honourable members, wh...
Read full storyCameron sacks Cabinet
In a dramatic move, Prime Minister David Cameron has sacked his Cabinet declaring that his colleagues had failed to see the economic peril the Government was in. Demonstrators on the streets are, however, unlikely to accept Cameron's move. Ever...
Read full storyThe Worm Has Turned
A new threat to the World was revealed to the world today by Prof Mann of the Biological Study Group at Oxford University. 'The worm has turned' Mann explained to a packed audience of scientists from throughout the world 'we are experiencing EXTRA GRAVITATIONAL PULL. This fearful development occurs in the earth's history spasmodically. The cause is deep in the earth's core. This explains the re...
Read full storyPawn Stars' Rick Harrison and Lindsay Lohan Agree to Swap: Chumlee for a Pack of Gum, Chumlee Will Act as Body Double In Future Rehab Stints
The phrase 'Timing is everything' was once again verified when Lindsay Lohan visited Pawn Stars star Rick Harrison's pawn shop yesterday afternoon in Vegas. Lohan walked into the shop just as Rick Harrison was blowing up over another boneheaded tran...
Read full story'Turn Back the Clock, Lets All Root for Baby Doc', is Haiti's New Chant That Has Gone Viral
Turn back the clock, let's all root for Baby Doc Turn back the clock, let's all root for Baby Doc We won't shiver and we won't quiver, We'll all give Baby Doc our nice brown liver. This is the chant that is being sung throughout Haiti by the su...
Read full storyPresident Obama Faces Charges of An Alleged White House Christmas Party Fund Cover Up AKA Hip Hop Gate
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The highly respected Washington newspaper The D.C. Dispatch Diplomat has broken the story about an alleged irregularity regarding The White House Christmas Party Fund. DC2D reporter Granola Dallydoo, 29, has been investigating t...
Read full storyRobert Pattinson Caught Caressing Ines Sainz 'Caboose' At Knotts Berry Farm
BUENA PARK, California - A local Left Coast newspaper is reporting that Robert Pattinson star of the Twilight vampire series movies and Ines Sainz star sports reporter for Mexico's Azteca TV were recently spotted at the famed Knotts Berry Farm Amusem...
Read full storyDemi Lovato Is Finally Released From The Rehab Clinic After A Three Month Stay
LOS ANGELES - The 18-year-old singing sensation Demi Lovato has finally been released from The Henry and Betty Ford Rehab Clinic after spending three months at the Los Angeles facility. Lovato who was wearing an 'I Love Justin Bieber' T-shirt, Sel...
Read full storyTorres - Please release me
Liverpool striker Fernando Torres, seemingly wants to be looking at the exit door at Anfield. To go to Chelsea. Seems it's a question of personal choice, and not, as has been suggested in some quarters, a case of 'tapping up' a contractually oblig...
Read full storyLionel Richie Finally Apologizes for "Penny Lover"
Beverly Hills- After years of agonizing anticipation, music lovers around the world finally have received an apology from Lionel Richie for the recording and release of the 1983 song Penny Lover. When news of the mea culpa broke, fans slowly gath...
Read full storyReal Life: The Video Game Review
Real Life, a TV series and popular video game franchise, is one of the oldest games/TV shows out there. Created by GodCo already it has clocked up over 15 million seasons, making it the longest production show ever. This review specifically deals with the spin-off Real Life: The Video Game. Firstly, the game has no monthly fee. That's right. NO MONTHLY FEE. The catch is that you have to spen...
Read full storyESA Violation Upheld by the US Supreme Court
Washington DC: Infamous spoof writer Philbert of Macadamia's last court appeal was rejected by the US Supreme Court today. Philbert was convicted of violating the Endangered Species Act (ESA), 15 years ago. Philbert arrived at the Supreme Court ch...
Read full storyRoomba Robot Released that Can Clear Up Street Crime
LONDON - At a demonstration in the city's notourious East End, iRobot showcased their new 'bot. iRobot who also make the Roomba, the self-vacuuming robot for the home, will sell the new Cityba, which can clear up street crime with efficiency and s...
Read full storyMonsignor Francois DuBois SJ Denied Entry By UK Immigration
Controversial cleric, Monsignor Francois DuBois SJ, of West 'By God!' Virginia, in the Disunited States of Americky, today sparked a major international diplomatic controversy as he was sent packing by UK immigration authorities at London's Heathrow...
Read full storyGeorge Clooney Being Treated for "Malaria"
One-dimensional pseudo-actor George Clooney announced that he contracted "malaria" while visiting Africa earlier in January to lend his support to a referendum on The Sudan's law banning the kind of activity that can cause one to contract "malaria",...
Read full storyMo'Nique Shaves Legs, Donates Result to Locks Of Love
When hirsute fatsack Mo'Nique brings her Academy Award in for it's weekly polishing and cake frosting removal, she'll be doing so weighing just a few pounds less: She's broken he 20-year pledge of fetid horribleness and shaved her legs. But it's n...
Read full storyShylock Humes And The Case Of The Purloined Budgerigar, Part Four
We looked around the room. Shylock Humes was conspicuous by his absence. The Turkish cushions where he had been smoking lay in a shapeless heap in the corner. Well, that is not strictly accurate. It was a heap-shaped heap. But the cushions were definitely in it. That much is true. The fire had gone out. It was always doing that, without telling us where it was going. No doubt it would come cree...
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