Written by Inhopeless

Saturday, 29 January 2011

BIRMINGHAM, ENG. - Spoofer Inhopeless has ventured into the activity known as Exercise.

According to his brother, Exercise cannot be done using the internet, however the word has been extensively Googled (TM) by Inhopeless.

Exercise apparently comes from a Latin word meaning to 'make use of'. Apparently, to make use of the writer's weak muscles.

According to the writer, exercise looks 'pretty mean'.

"At school, they would do P.E.," he said. "I never saw the use for P.E. It's not gonna help me design rockets or do my job as a psychologist. 'Oh, look, this guy ran 2 km, he's not insane!' If I want to buy something, I use Tescodirect.com. If I need to get anything, I use the car. Simple as."

The benefits to exercise were obstenially ignored by the Spoofer, who states the pain it brings is 'stupid'.

Many of the public agree with him.

"I'm a physisist," said Dr. Sarah Greene, pausing to work out the cosine of 70 for a project. "Nought-point-three-four. Anyway, how hs P.E. helped me? NOTHING. The only running I'll ever do is the central console when we work out how to perform fusion reactions. Can P.E. come up with an unlimited energy source? No."

"Yeah," said Mark Rover, "If I ever want to do [conventional] football, Sports 3D. Like I'm actually in the game."

As of press time, Inhopeless was taken to hospital after breaking a hip joint.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Exercise

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