Ralph Nader Announced he will run in the 2000 Presidential Election
Ralph Nader recently announced he will be running in the 2000 Presidential election. Speaking before seven of his supporters, Mr. Nader said he has long felt the 2000 election was fundamentally unsound, and welcomed the chance to run again in it this...Read full story
Barack Hussein Obama endorsed by Osama bin Laden
Al-Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden has endorsed Barack Hussein Obama. Speaking from the confines of his cave somewhere on the Afghanistan-Pakistan border bin laden said:...Read full story
More and more Brits using the term 'soccer'
A recent Cooper-Sinclair poll showed that many Brits are beginning to refer to European football as soccer. The term soccer originated in the States in 1906, when Yale University radio announcer Donald Gregory, calling a game against UPenn said, &quo...Read full story
Banged Up With Blunkett in Jersey: Ex-Home Sec to lock up young thugs in bizarre new reality TV show
St Helier, Jersey - (Grim Ass Mess): Talk about hideous co-incidence. As Jersey investigators prepare to excavate a bricked-up cellar in the notorious Haut De La Garenne children's home former Labour Home Secretary David Blunkett plans to become...Read full story
Dear Tiki,I am having a problem with guys not staring at my chest, or my bum. I am very curvy, and quite attractive.Read full story
In Search of the Fabled White Turd
It is well documented in Tibetan folklore that there is one location in the world where a White Turd can be found and it is regarded by the Holy men of the region as being very sacred.Read full story
Naomi Campbell checks in for a Brazilian
Sao Paulo - (Vagus Nerve Mess): Supermodel Naomi Campbell has flown in to Brazil for a clitoris transplant. Reports from Sao Paulo state her own little pinkie recently fell off from too much crack-fueled wear and tear.Read full story
Valerie Bertinelli, "I am so sorry...."
Poor Jenny Craig, it appears that Valerie Bertinelli has been cheating on her with Nutrisystem.Read full story
Royal Family In Mourning
London - The British Royal Family are in mourning after the tragic death of Prince Richard at Buckingham Palace. Prince Richard died after falling asleep at the wheel.Read full story
Didn't Hillary quit during the last debate? She appeared to capitulate near the final minutes after being tagged by Barack Obama for voting to authorize the war in Iraq. Instead of eyes fixed on Obama, she began looking down at her lap, smiling...Read full story
SNL's Obama role goes to Fred Armisen; NAACP withdraws Darrell Hammond's image award nomination for most positive blackface role model still on TV in protest
New York, New York - Lorne Michaels finally ended speculation regarding who would be playing the role of presidential nominee, Barack Obama, on SNL this season, announcing that the part would go to the show's other regular impersonator of persons...Read full story
UK DNA Register Put on Hold and Quickly Forgotten About
Middle England's enthusiasm for a national DNA database fell away dramatically last night after police revealed that the DNA register will include people committing minor offences regardless of class such as speeding, dropping em...Read full story
Britney and Gazza's Shocking Re-hab Romance
The wacky L.A. celebrity scene was electrified yesterday when it was announced that Britney Spears has become engaged to Britain's ace footballer, Gazza.Read full story
Obama's Support (and Hillary's Behind) Grows Broader
WASHINGTON - In the last two months, Barack Hussein Obama has built a commanding coalition among U.S. voters and is now viewed as the candidate best able to beat war veteran John McCain in the 2008 election.Read full story
Joe Torre's pitch: Keep those pants on, fellas
Joe Torre, the frumpy Los Angeles Dodgers manager, reportedly will replace studly Michael Jordan as the new Hanes Underwear pitchman in its national TV ad campaign. Torre tested well among people who still bought underwear, such as the 65-and-over ge...Read full story
Pyongyang Philharmonic booked for Jenna Bush's Predator Chapel Ranch Wedding
Crawford, Texas - (Orchestrated Mess): In a tit-for-tat exchange of cultural realpolitik the Pyongyang Philharmonic Orchestra has been booked to play at Jenna Bush's May 10 wedding at the family homestead Predator Chapel Ranch.Read full story
Dana is Dustin
A clever a mix of ropes, pulleys and smoke enabled Dana and Dustin to be seen in the same room for the first time ever on Saturday. Dana's ferious attack on Dustin was a cunning attempt to cover this fact up. Amazing camera work and CG animation...Read full story
Keegan To Be Sacked Next Week - If He Hasn't Walked Already
Kevin Keegan, the beleaguered Newcastle United manager, is on his way out of St James' Park, according to sources at the club, and could be sacked as early as next week, if he hasn't already done a ru...Read full story
Lindsay Lohan Endorses John McCain, Asks What is Wrong With Sex for Favors?
SANTA MONICA (FMLiveWire) - American's sweetheart Lindsay Lohan has strongly endorsed John McCain as the Republican presidential candidate, asking "What is wrong with giving sex for favors? I do it all the time, and John should not be ashame...Read full story
'Diana Worked For KGB' spooks tell coroner
London - (Turncoat Mess): Princess Diana was a KGB stooge whose heroin addiction and predilection for screwing dodgy Mossad plants like Paul Burrell and James Hewitt quickly outed her espionage activities security service top brass told the royal inq...Read full story
Miley Cyrus is Really a Boy!
Today, during a one million dollar interview, Miley Cyrus, admitted to People magazine that she used to be a boy!...Read full story
Singer Axl Rose Freaks Out
Los Angeles,Ca (Rooters) W.Axl Rose lead singer of the band Guns N' Roses freaks out as his plan for Chinese Democracy to be a bluegrass album was leaked on TheSpoof.com and on the siteRead full story
Tiger Woods Has Tiger Genes!
As Tiger Woods has marched to yet another devastating victory in the world of golf (this time amid the pig farms of Marana, Arizona) geneticists at the Wrangler Institute for Gene Studies in Rodeo, Texas have announced that Tiger Woods is at least pa...Read full story
UK Kiddies Lifestyle Poll with commentary from real big UK'ers
CHILDHOOD LIFESTYLE POLL with commentary from real big UK'ers:...Read full story
Materialism Harms UK Kiddies!
Not long ago, a study of British child-rearing practices suggested that the UK's kiddies are near the bottom of the barrel. Now we hear that impoverishment of Britain's brats is in fact a blessing incognito. It's material things like warm...Read full story
Obama Rebuts African Dress Photos With Clinton Nudies
Barack Obama's campaign is outraged with Clinton staffers who reportedly released photos of their candidate in traditional African garb.Read full story
Ghosts Launch Lawsuit Against Benny Hinn
Evangalist Benny Hinn is set to be sued for fraud by a group of ghosts represented by "Crossing Over" host John Edward.The ghosts claim Hinn's promises of salvation for cash were not only false but when they mentioned his name to the at...Read full story
Feminists Back Obama
In what seems to be the final lance in Hillary Clinton's hope for a presidential nomination, a national organization of feminists has declared that it is now backing Barack Obama.Read full story
Downed Cows Cause Steer Uprising
Thousands of cows were heard mooing across the nation as news came down that a meat packing facility in Chino, California, will shut down permanently.Read full story
Big Busts Unite!
I say all of us big busted girls should unite. How many of us are tired of black, tan, and white? Can I get an Amen, sisters? How many of us are tired of the little B-cups getting leopard print, and pretty colors? How many of us are tired of stiff, itchy lace? How many of us just want to feel pretty?...Read full story
Jane Fonda, One-Time Antiwar Activist and Former Hotttie, Drops "C" Bomb On Network TV
Jane Fonda, famous actress, anti-Vietnam War activist, and daughter of acting great Henry Fonda, appeared on the February 14 edition of NBC's "Today" show.Read full story
Obama robed as a Klansman is 'Clinton smear"
Barack Obama is fighting for his political career after a picture of him dressed as a KKK Imperial Wizard appeared on an internet site. It has sparked heated exchanged between himself and rat-faced fellow Democratic nominee Hillary C...Read full story
Miley Cyrus Scandal Upon Scandal
Once again, young Miley Cyrus is embroiled in a scandal, and mental health professionals are concerned.Read full story
Obama and Oprah - Same Same?
After months of tireless efforts, United States Presedential candidate Barack Obama has admitted that he and Oprah Winfrey are, in fact, the same person.Read full story