Ask Tiki

Funny story written by Tiki Murphy

Tuesday, 26 February 2008

Dear Tiki,I am having a problem with guys not staring at my chest, or my bum. I am very curvy, and quite attractive.

Women tell me I am beautiful all the time, but howcome I can't get any guys to notice me?

I mean, I am rich, beautiful, adventurous, and would spoil my man. The last date I went on, the guy asked me some stupid questions, like, 'who is the President' or something like that. Like I would know that. When he dropped me off, he didn't even try to cop a feel, let alone try to get into my bed.

What is wrong with me?

Busty, Blonde, and Beautiful.

Dear 3 B, first off, I need to know who these men are, and can you give them my email addy? Secondly, you don't know who the President is? Thirdly, if I help you get a date, can you swing some of that money my way?

It figures that the woman who just wants a good time is getting all the guys that want to settle down. I believe your problem is that you are dating the men out there that want a serious and fulfilling relationship.

My advice to you, is dye your hair brown, gain about 50lbs, and start reading financial reports. Face it honey - men don't want the beautiful Baywatch babes anymore - they want fat and ugly.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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