Prezza almost became Prime Minister
Labour spin doctor Alistair Campbell, revealed in an autobiography how Prime Minister Tony Blair almost resigned because of the Iraq War.
Read full storyCharles Kennedy "spoken to" for starting fire in train
A Liberal Democrat spokesman has refused to admit or deny reports that ex-leader and town drunk, Charles Kennedy, was caught smoking in a train. Smoking in a public place, including a train, was, of course, made illegal from 1 July 2007. Kennedy was...
Read full storyCleavage In Parliament
Following the failed terrorist attempt by car bombers in both London and Glasgow, the spanking new Gordon Brown government convened to address the House of Parliament, the nation and the world, revealing a totally never seen view of government: cleav...
Read full storyAlistair Campbell's diarrohea released
London - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): Former Blair mouthpiece Alisatir Campbell has published his diaries which give a graphic account of his devastation when his blood father, WMD inspector Dr David Kelly was found topped "by the Bushes" in acco...
Read full storyRon Paul Wins Election After Donnybrook
WASHINGTON - After George W. Bush claimed for himself the title of "New American Dictator" in 2007, the election process in the US was changed for good, with Bush's claim to power until his death, either timely or untimely.
Read full storySuperman Defeats Evil Mustache on Lex Luthor Clone
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Dublin - Superman, in a heroic battle against the evil mustache on Lex Luthor's clone, Mark Lowton, editor at TheSpoof.com, was finally victorious after using his Kryptonian intellect to come up with a way to remove the evi...
Read full storyNine Federal prosecutors "knew too much about Enron"
Washington DC - (Ass Mess): Brazening out his bluff to gag former White House aides Sara M Taylor and Harriet E Miers from testifying to Congress about the firing of nine Federal prosecutors who knew too much about his involvement in the Enron fraud,...
Read full storyBush Denies Congress Access to Aides
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington - President Bush invoked executive privilege Monday to deny requests by Congress for testimony from two former aides about the firings of federal prosecutors. Same old story, different names.
Read full storyGeratic Performers Drain Live Earth
The amount of good that the Live Earth concerts achieved has been offset by the amount of non-renewable energy used to keep the geratic performers satisfied.
Read full storyBritish PM Gordon Brown registers in Wales as Smith
CARMARTHENSHIRE (Llandovery) - Gerald and Sylvia Pritchard have lived in Llandovery all their lives and swear they saw British Prime Minister Gordon Brown register at The New White Lion yesterday.
Read full storyGaza lioness freed after two years, reunited with brother
Gaza Strip - (Ass Mess): A Gaza Zoo lioness has been freed after two years' captivity by animal abusing mobsters and reunited with her sibling.
Read full storyClimate Channel Staff Resigns En Masse
Hotlana, GA (IP) - The entire staff of the Climate Channel resigned today in a mass protest over working conditions and disgust over recent and evolving changes in programming.
Read full storyRobbie McEwen's Tour stage 1 win accredited to Tahitian Noni Juice intake
BELGIQUE (Gand) -- Champion Tour de France sprinter Robbie McEwen (Predictor) said today that his energy spurts come from drinking Tahitian Noni Juice. And on stage 2 of the Tour, someone stole his canteen full of the stuff. "I wonder who that...
Read full story140,000 Turkish Troops Will Tour Iraq
Wishbone, Turkey (IP) - 140,000 Turkish troops currently sitting along Iraq's border will soon enter Iraq. They carry with them games such as Backgammon, Chess, Checkers, jigsaw puzzles and countless other fun items. They will also bring along...
Read full storyJohn Kerry Wants French Toast
John Kerry spoke out on Iraq today, calling for a "French Toast strategic endeavor." Kerry's announcement was in response to the Bush Waffle strategy...
Read full storyNew Dress Code For Texas Country Club Golfers
(MUSICMAN PRESS) The Texas Committee of Country Clubs (TCCC) decided to make the change in attire last week. Said TCCC Board Administrator Dick Hardy. "We all agreed to go with the more professional appearance because, by and large, the majority...
Read full storyFred Thompson's Wife Is A Hottie!
(Tennessee) - Former U.S. senator and TV actor, Fred Thompson, was considered a long shot in the 2008 presidential race. Until voters saw his wife. The 40-something Mrs. Thompson, Jeri Kehn, is not only a very good looking blond, she's a former a...
Read full storyClay Aiken Under FBI Investigation for Airline Incident
American Idol's second season runner-up Clay Aiken is being investigated by the FBI due to an incident on an airline. Aiken was traveling to a concert and was stuck in coach when he got into an arguement with a woman over an armrest.
Read full storyGiuliani, McCain & Romney Endorse Pancake Strategy
In response to the Bush Administration's new "Waffle" strategy for Iraq, GOP candidates Rudy Giuliani, John McCain,...
Read full storyAmerican Idol Katherine McPhee in Sexy "Stuff" Magazine Lingerie Pictures
Former American Idol runner-up Katherine McPhee, apparently jealous at the buzz created by this year's contestants, appears on the cover of Stuff magazine in some sexy lingerie. There is also a photo spread of her inside the magazine in her silky un...
Read full storyBush Announces New Iraq Strategy: Waffle
The Bush Administration today provided a detailed explanation of a new strategy in Iraq, called Waffle. Following on the recent "Surge", which hasn't worked according to many sources, US forces will now vary the intensity of their effor...
Read full storySpoof editor denies Hitler mustache link rumors
England - (Rotters): Spoof editor Mark Lowton has flatly denied any idealistic or inspirational connections between the hair growth on his upper lip dubbed The Mustache and that once sported by the Third Reich leader Adolf Hitler.
Read full storyEqual Opportunities: Virgin Hires Leprechaun
LONDON. In an extreme attempt to keep up, and go beyond, equal opportunity laws, Richard Branson - the enigmatic leader of the Virgin Group - has hired several mythical creatures under the advice of the now redundant JK Rowling.
Read full storyIraqis say: "Hang Bush if you want end to civil war"
Baghdad, Iraq - (Rotters): The leaders of warring Iraqi factions told UK diplomatic sources in Baghdad today that a tit-for-tat hanging of George W Bush "is guaranteed to restore law and order" in their ravaged country:...
Read full storyGordon Brown's July 10 arrest fears
Whitehall - (Ass Mess): Gordon Brown fears that the thirteenth day of his appointment as the new UK Prime Monster may be his last after cops in the Serious Fraud Offices hinted they couldn't delay charges in the cash-for-peerages-and NHS terroris...
Read full storyBjorn Borg: "I had a big hand in Federer's conception"
Wimbledon - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): Five consecutive times Wimbledon chamption Bjorn Borg told a tennis crowd at last night's Wimbledon Champions' Ball that he "was probably the biological father of Roger Federer", and was thrilled a...
Read full storyNewfoundland and Labrador Announces Solution to Equalization Standoff with Ottawa
Today Danny Williams, the premier of Newfoundland and Labrador, unveiled a plan to resolve the ongoing standoff with Ottawa over control of offshore oil interests. The plan calls for an all out invasion of Canada after what Williams describes as 60...
Read full storyHell child rejected at Australian Catholic school
Melbourne, Australia - (Ass Mess): A five year old boy with an Austrian family surname than means 'bright' has been banned from attending St Peter the Apostle School Roman Catholic in Melbourne because priests fear his presence will incite sp...
Read full storyX-Factor Star Loses Karaoke Final
Former X-Factor contestant Ben Mills was beaten into second place at the "Pub Fun" karaoke competition, at a small bar in Wilmington-On-Sea last night. The singer was said to be devastated after a voting panel of locals gave the £17 first p...
Read full storyAl-Qaeda Fires Bin-Laden, Courts Cheney
The terrorist group Al-Qaeda announced today that after several-failed attacks in the United Kingdom it had fired Osama Bin Laden as its manager.
Read full storyHull Bingo Derby Degenerates Into Game Of Rugby League
The Rugby Football League are to investigate yesterday's goings-on at the Super League clash between Hull Kingston Rovers and their cross-city rivals Hull FC at Rovers'
Read full storyArt Bell Admits to Being US Govt Agent
Pahrump, Nevada: Following the announcement of his retirement last week, popular radio host Art Bell admitted to a stunned media that for the past twenty years he has been overseeing a trickle-release of sensitive mis-information as...
Read full storyTransport for London takes to the air, and gets up your nose!
A new way to fight congestion has been discovered in Transport for London - The Way Forward. There are a number of new and far reaching ideas for congestion solution in London. These include congestion charging for aircraft going over London's ai...
Read full storyKate Moss Starts Dating Again After Dumping Pete
Skinny model Kate Moss has lost no time in getting back into the dating game. Just days after dumping spotty drug-addled no-hoper Pete Doherty, Kate has been spotted partying with her new bloke.
Read full storyPrince William Will Elevate Kate to "Mistress" Level
Buckingham Palace today announced firmly that Prince William will not be marrying Kate Middleton following speculation that the couple are back together.
Read full storyBoeing Unveils Environmentally Friendly Passenger Plane
Bowing to pressure from environment agencies planemaker Boeing has today unveiled its new "green" 787 Dreamliner aircraft powered by vegetable oil.
Read full storyStonehenge is not one of Seven Wonders - Just a Pile of Old Rocks
In a surprise twist Stonehenge, the oldest site known to man was not classed as one of the Seven Wonders of the World. A panel of experts has dismissed the ancient structure as "just a pile of old rocks."...
Read full storyMustache sets up rival website, Lowton "Gutted"
Mark Lowton's mustache has moved over to another server and set up a rival website. It hopes that writers will follow and make up libellous stories about TheSpoof.com.
Read full storyMadonna, Kylie in ebay virginity frenzy
Sensationally, both Madonna's and Kylie's virginity were found for sale on ebay today.
Read full storyThe Stripping of a Paris Missionary
MALIBU (Calf.) -- Today. For God's sake Paris, put on a L.A. street wear micro mini before we all go Buzz, ding-dong -- Hello. You look like my 5th grade primary school teacher. Pull yourself together girl.
Read full storyNose Whiskers Find A New Meaning For The Word Split-Ends
LANCASTER, LOON VALLEY, ENGLAND-- (ALOPECIA DIGEST: HAIR TODAY, GONE TOMORROW) It was a HAIR-raising experience for a local man attempting to shave the nose-hairs which had over-grown onto his upper lip as he watched in horror, his symbol of adolesce...
Read full storyMark Lowton, Spoof Editor, Grew Handlebar Mustache to Get Women
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Dublin - TheSpoof.com's editor, Mark Lowton, that cheap, good for nothing b%$#$^d that won't pay those of us who write for him, revealed today that he grew his handlebar mustache in order to get women.
Read full storyNew Seven Wonders Of The World List Contains Two Surprises
A survey carried out in the UK has revealed a major change in the public's perception of what constitutes a Wonder, with regard to the compilation of the list of the Seven Wonders Of The World. All the old favourites are still on most people's lis...
Read full storyNew Anti-Terrorism Measure Announced by Bush
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington - George Bush, head of the joint National Security and Homeland Security departments, announced their latest anti-terrorist technique that all citizens should immediately employ. The measure involves using red duct...
Read full storyBush Dispels Rumors About He and Tony Blair
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington - George Bush held a press conference today walking holding the hand of his fiance', Tony Blair. President Bush hoped it would dispel rumors that he was seeking a new lover.
Read full storyInvisible Man Identified
KEGINBUMPORT, MAINE (IP) - News trickling out of this usually quiet waterfront coomunity indicates that the invisible man has been found and identified. He is none other than John Kerry who disappeared after he rolled over and played dead after the...
Read full storyRon Paul Hired by the Democratic Party
Reports have surfaced that Ron Paul has been given $2.5 million by the Democratic party to sabotage the Republican party. Ron Paul's goal is to sway the opinions of registered Republicans towards being more anti-war which would then help the Repu...
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