Written by Warren Redlich

Monday, 9 July 2007

image for Giuliani, McCain & Romney Endorse Pancake Strategy
Far more attractive than Rudy McRomney

In response to the Bush Administration's new "Waffle" strategy for Iraq, GOP candidates Rudy Giuliani, John McCain, and Mitt Romney announced their plan for a "Pancake" strategy. The Pancake approach would involve leveling large portions of Iraq, one at a time.

Rudy Giuliani led off the press conference in South Carolina with a stinging rebuke to Bush, calling the Waffle "absurd and outrageous ... this is worse than that idiot Ron Paul guy." The Ron Paul reference was not explained, and the reporters present were unable to identify who Ron Paul is or why he would matter.

John McCain followed Giuliani with a forceful expression about the power of military action: "I spent years in a military prison in Vietnam, so I know what works - straight talk and straight action. We will pound the Iraqis into submission."

Mitt Romney also expressed his support for the Pancake, but his remarks were somewhat cryptic, with references to butter, sausages and bacon.

Democratic candidates had no immediate response, but insiders indicate that Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama are both working on bold initiatives for the Iraq war.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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