Chinese In Bid To Buy Royal Family
[AP, Chipping Sodbury] It was revealed today that a Chinese investment consortium is attempting to buy the British Royal Family. Wun Hung Lo, acquisitions representative for the Happy Lucky Investment Company number 4 based in Long Dong province of n...
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Queen Caught in "Compromising Situation"
The Daily Mail has announced it has allegations made by a former Royal servant, pertaining to HRH Queen Elizabeth II being discovered in a "compromising situation" in one of the bedrooms at Buckingham Palace. We are told the allegations in...
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Naked Princess Eugenie Says She's Just Like You, Only Richer
(London, England) - Caught frolicking naked on her college grounds, Britain's Princess Eugenie says she did it to connect with commoners and to "show off my naughty bits, of which I am quite proud."...
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Meghan And Harry's Baby, Archie, Says He Won't Attend Christening Service
The Duke and Duchess of Sussex, Prince Harry and his wife Meghan, have a problem: their son Archie has said he refuses to be christened with the name 'Archie', and will not attend his own christening later today. The royal couple had planned to ha...
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Charles: Yes, Camilla Could be Queen, but So Could Helen Mirren or Cate Blanchett
Seeking to undo the sulk inducing news that two new polls show the public prefers King William and Queen Cinderella over King Charles and Queen Camilla, the Prince of Wales demonstrated his peerless knack for bad-to-worse by announcing his darling wi...
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The Queen Reveals Liking For Throbbing Gristle
In the unlikeliest of associations imaginable, Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth, has revealed that she is a fan of industrial music pioneers, Throbbing Gristle. TG, formed in Hull in 1975 from the remnants of COUM Transmissions, stunned audiences with...
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Duchess Of Cornwall Breaks Leg
How the Royals celebrate Christmas
More fabulous Royal Wedding souvenirs announced
'Orff with his head! Prince Harry to be put on trial for disrespecting the Queen
Prince Philip To Change His Car To One That 'Causes' Fewer Accidents
Princess Diana Inquest Latest: Sir Elton John To Write Another New Song
Beatrice and Eugenie Stripped of "Protection', "Must Crawl Home on their Own" says Queen!
Dooleys by royal appointment
It's a Royal Family Jeremy Kyle Show
Royal family show off their crown jewels
Harry to join Top Gear
Palace Bans Prince Philip Dead Pool Entries
Prince Andrew Has Decided To Go And Live On Pitcairn Island
Prince Andrew, the poor, beleaguered member of the Royal family who the media just won't leave alone after he indulged in 'a bit of the old in-out' with an underaged American girl in 2001, has decided that enough is enough, and that he will leave Lon...
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Joy Renee Cote Kissed Britney Spears 6-17-2006
LOONTOWN, UNITED KINGDUMB-(ROTTERS) The Royal family has been bombarded from the bowels of the Twilight Zone these last few weeks and the target, Young Prince William.
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King Paul senile, alleges Prince Richard
San Antonio, Texas - His Most Christian Majesty, King Paul Emery Washington, Ruler of America, Protector of Canada, Lord of Mexico, Duke of Hawaii and the Pacific Isles, and Emperor of the Middle East, is alleged to be afflicted with Alzheimer's dise...
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Prince Andrew in new, one-armed bandit row
Prince Andrew has claimed that photos of him cuddling various women may have been doctored because, as far as he can remember, he lost an arm in the Falklands War. The Prince said that he leads a very busy life, and, therefore, cannot keep track o...
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Kate Middleton Thinks Roger Federer Is A Bit Dishy
The Duchess of Cambridge, Kate Middleton, has told close friends that she thinks tennis superstar and tomorrow's Wimbledon Men's Singles finalist, Roger Federer, is "a bit dishy". The Duchess will attend the Centre Court spectacular with her siste...
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Phil The Greek Restores Noble Right Of Prima Nocta
In what is likely to be seen as a highly controversial move, HRH Prince Philip has taken it upon himself to restore the ancient noble's right of Prima Nocta. This is the right which allows a senior royal to have sexual rights to the wife of a newly m...
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Duchess Of York Thrown Out Of Hull By Angry Obesity Enthusiasts
Sarah Ferguson, or, if you like, the Duchess of York, has been unceremoniously dumped out of the city of Hull by unhealthy eating campaigners, after starring in a reality TV show which promoted better diets amongst the Poor
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William Barr Issues New Four Page Summary; Rules that U.S. is Legally "Still a Monarchy"
Washington - Attorney General William Barr has determined that the Constitutional Democracy envisioned by the founding fathers was "fatally misconceived" and thus illegal, and has ruled that the United States must return to a monarchy form of governm...
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Prince Harry and Meghan Markle Are Both Thrilled That Queen Elizabeth Did Not Have Them Deported To Siberia
BAYOU CANE, Louisiana – Prince Harry and his wife, the lusciously-lovely Meghan Markle, were visiting the world famous Monsieur Qui Qui Swamp down in the heart of the swamp bayous, Bayou Cane this week. She told Maximus Bedstraw, of The Grandiose...
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Deluded Cowell Says - "I am the true heir to the throne! All bow down before me!"
In a story that would not seem amiss in his own hit soap opera, Coronation Street, pint-sized pop Svengali, Simon Cowell, has claimed that Prince Phillip called him a sponger. Close friends and insiders to his inner scrotum, tell of Cowell's incre...
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Donald Trump Could Become Interim Monarch Of The UK
Royal geneologists decided at an emergency meeting in London last night, that, if the worst were to happen, and the Royal Family were laid waste by the current health pandemic, then, at a pinch, and for purely a temporary period only, the US presiden...
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Kate Middleton buys milk and isn't photographed doing so
DAILY Mail readers were utterly furious last night after discovering that Kate Middleton had bought a pint of milk from the corner shop and hadn't been photographed doing so. The slip only came to light after another customer, a Mail reader, wrote in...
Read full storyFunny Royalty Headlines
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Bitch Smacked Up By Gunner Queen
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New Princess On The Block
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Princes go on Goodies Bike Ride - Goodies, goodie-goodie-yum-yum!
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Henry 8th Minted
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Buckingham Palace Closed After Tourist Mauled By Camilla
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Simon Cowell on Talent Search for Body Double As Camilla Says "No More Bloody Public Appearances, You Twat!"
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Sarah, Duchess of York not invited to Wills and Kate's bash due to World Tour!
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Prince Harry says Cressida is a great ride
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Prince Charles Is The King Of The Mole People
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Brexit Causing Palace Staffing Crisis
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Stop the Music...Or Else!
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No More Fun At The Palace For Kate Middleton's Pussy
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Ensign Family Checking Account Outed
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Double Disaster
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Prime Minister reveals Plan for Constitutional Change
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England Prepares For Scottish Independence
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Royal Family Mad at Prince Henry for Giving Marijuana to Prince Charles
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Prince Philip Arrested Again
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Prince Harry Says He'll Have Nanny Smack Archie's Bottom If He Does It Again
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Anger as Harry and Meghan ghost the Queen
