Prince William and Duchess Kate Receive Conjugal Logo Thus Creating New Beast

Funny story written by Tony Bagodonutz

Saturday, 28 September 2013

Some couples buy matching outfits. Royal couples get matching heraldry.

A new Conjugal Coat of Arms for the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge blends William's royal shield comprised of English and Scottish Lions and a harp to symbolize Ireland with Kate's shield marked by a chevron and unicorns.

The unique conjugation has led to the conception of a newfound mythical beast in royal coat of arms folklore, the "Lion-Corn".

The term "Lion-Corn" is not to be confused with the painful condition that occurs on the bottom of a captive feline foot (not a captive foot, mind you, rather a foot attached to a feline that is in captivity).

When said feline is kept in a very confined space, such as one where it is in captivity (again, the feline is in captivity. Well I suppose the "space" might be considered to be in captivity, but that is a concept difficult to wrap one's mind around. No, I'm not referring to wrapping the feline's mind around a concept. I'm referring to "one's" mind, as in "your" mind. Anyhow what? How can space be kept in captivity. Let's simplify this. A lion is in a zoo damn it.)

The condition is called "Lion Corn" (or "Tiger Corn", "Puma Corn" depending on the species, you get the idea, I hope. This isn't real. This is satire. Right? Right.)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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