Harry and Meagan release long-awaited book about NY car chase

Funny story written by Paul Blake

Monday, 29 May 2023

image for Harry and Meagan release long-awaited book about NY car chase
Harry and Meagan both have very old typewriters with them at all times, for maximum paper usage.

A few weeks after they were chased through the streets of New York City for over 2 hours like dogs, Harry and Meghan have released the much-anticipated tell-all book about the incident. The book, titled ed, tell-all book about the incident. The book, titled CHASED AROUND NEW YORK FOR OVER 2 HOURS LIKE DOGS, comes out just in time for Father's Day, if your father happens to need a good doorstop—or to level a really wonky table.

Even more amazing is the fact that the 'un-royals' say they started writing the tell-all book during the actual car chase!

"Yep, they are trying to beat the competition," confirmed their publisher, Gloria Weldbottom. "The couple were working on the book and discussing cover shot ideas during the chase through the gritty streets of New York City when the paparazzi finally got bored and hungry and decided to go to an all-night sushi place on Staten Island called Sal's Sushi Place."

(Side note: Sal meant to call his restaurant Sal's Sushi "Palace," but the sign guy messed up and moved to Tampa before fixing it.)


Photographs that appeared in the gossip rags the day after the car chase appear to support the idea that Harry and Meghan were actually writing a book while being chased.

"You can tell," told one paparazzi nicknamed Ricky the Weasel, who agreed to meet in a shady Vietnamese restaurant out on Long Island called Long Dongs (which was no mistake. The owner is just a jerk.)


Mr. Weasel pointed to the pictures he took. "You can see Meghan furiously typing away on an old typewriter while we were chasing them! It was crazy. They are obsessed with releasing books and using old typewriters. During the chase, I went right up to the window of their car on my motorbike and banged on it... and Meghan actually shushed me. She just looked at me all annoyed and shushed me, with her finger in the air. Meanwhile, hubby is just looking wistfully out of the window, chewing on a pencil, trying to think of just the right words for his emotions. It was bizarre. He was completely unfazed by the chase. Then he just started typing away on his old typewriter too. Near the end, he was taking selfies with us in the background. That's when we decided to just go to the sushi place. I didn't really want to end up on the cover of their latest book."

Regardless, the book was supposed to come out just days after the chase, according to their publisher, but the couple seemed to have had a long spat over the way Meghan looked in some of the watercolors Harry made of her during the chase. "That actually eliminated a fair portion of Harry's usable material," explained Ms. Weldbottom.

So, look for the Ex-Royal Royals' latest real-life cliffhanger, CHASED AROUND NEW YORK FOR OVER 2 HOURS LIKE DOGS, in a thick hardcover book that's very expensive and uses a shitload of trees—or—just wait for a little bit, and it will come out on a digital platform for like $3.99, which is probably still way overpriced.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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