Trump Says Kamala Harris Isn’t Electable?
Donald Trump said, in front of news cameras recording his voice, so there is no deniability. However, he often denies what's already on film. So, Trump said California’s Attorney General Kamala Harris is not electable. From god's mouth! Edito…
Read full storyAtomic Bomb Used in Gender Reveal Party
DALLAS – Taking the gender reveal party to the next level, a Dallas couple has used an atomic bomb to announce their child’s sex to the world. Ted and Heidi Sinkler, first-time parents, released hundreds of curies worth of radiation in their back…
Read full storyWhat is happening with the Archer's Pantomime this year?
Although it is only September, work is usually well under way for the Ambridge pantomime production, but overseer Lydia Snell has barely mentioned it this year. Although the smaller farms in Ambridge have been pre-occupied with COVID-19, and the p…
Read full storyMan's Data Isn't Backed Up
A man who uses a Smartphone to make telephone calls, send emails, browse the internet, and to see what kind of crap his family and friends have been up to on Facebook, has been told by his device that his data isn't backed up. Quite what this mean…
Read full storyWriter struggles to satisfy site's 100-word minimum limit
A writer on an online satirical news website has told of the difficulty he experienced, while writing one of his stories, of trying to satisfy the site's requirement which stipulates each article must contain at least one hundred words. The writer…
Read full storyDrinker slung out of pub for being drunk
A man who had, allegedly, drunk five pints of lager in an Essex pub at the weekend, was thrown out by the landlord for being drunk. Dave Brown, 28, who had been supping at the Bulldog and Nettles public house in Braintree from 5 o'clock until clos…
Read full storyMan can't wait for new Steps album
Music- and culture-free back-water Chutney on the Fritz has been starved of any exciting news for months now, so it is no surprise that pop music fan Stanley Bridgewater is eagerly looking forward to the release of 1990s favourite Steps new album, 'W…
Read full storyUK-EU withdrawal agreement is invalid! "Had my fingers crossed behind my back! So there!" claims PM
That model of integrity and honour, paragon of virtue, Boris Johnson, has expressed amazement at the EU's reaction to him wishing to renege on the withdrawal agreement he signed in January. "What a kerfuffle," began the Prime Minister, forcing EU…
Read full storyYoung UK ravers don't give a crap about Corona!
(NOT EDITED) It has been confirmed that 17 to 21 year-old's are causing a dent in Boris Johnson's plans to open up the UK economy, and once again become a world force chasing China, under orders from the USA. Boris Johnson, often takes hallucinato…
Read full storyPresident Trump Says He’s Not a Racist – He’s Just Selective
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida - (Satire News) – President Trump took a quick trip down to Mar-a-Lago to get his teeth cleaned, and to see about hiring a new chauffeur. While there, he was asked about reports that appeared in The Chicago Daily Wind, that sai…
Read full storyBritney Spears Wants To Become Relevant Again
HOLLYWOOD – (Celebrity Satire) - Britney Spears is 39, but she recently told Tittle Tattle Tonight's Pico de Gallo, that she is starting to feel 69. The singer, dancer, actress, ventriloquist, bricklayer, was once considered to be the “Princess of…
Read full storyColorado Says The Marijuana Business is Up by 4,000 Percent
DENVER – (Satire News) - The Colorado State Cannabis Coalition has just announced that marijuana sales have gone up 4,000% in the last three months. CSCC Director Lucy “Sinsemilla” Coxcoogan was asked by TMZ to explain the unprecedented increase.
Read full storyCardi B Said She Received a Text From Eric Trump
CHICAGO – (Satire News) - Hip-hop artist Cardi B was in the “Windy City” picking up two solid gold nipple rings she had ordered. She was asked by a reporter with the Chicago Daily Wind newspaper, about her getting a text from Eric Trump. Cardi…
Read full storyConstantly Coming Up With New Material Has Affected Man's Brain
In his book, 'Overconnected', author Bill Davidow claims that, far from taking generations, and hundreds of years, for the human brain to adapt to changes in the world we live in, it can do so in a very short space of time, and, possibly, within our…
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