Trump People Misspell NOBEL Again
Woops, the Trump people did it again! They misspelled Nobel. When you make a silly mistake, you’re supposed to learn, grow, and never make it again. It's sort of like, Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Amen! Several months ag…
Read full story9/11 Passes Off Without Incident For The Nineteenth Year In Succession
It's been nineteen years now since 11 September 2001, the day of the World Trade Center terrorist attacks, and, for the nineteenth year in succession since then, absolutely nothing of a similar nature took place. Today, Ground Zero, as it became k…
Read full storyJoe Biden: "I've Never Had an Original Idea."
At a press conference today, in Pennsylvania, Joe Biden defended himself against accusations from a Fox News journalist that he has a long history of shameless plagiarism, stealing others’ words, their ideas and even their family histories. “Who…
Read full storyTectonic Cultural Shifts at Warp Speed in US
Last week, President Donald Trump announced all Americans will likely be able to get a Covid-19 vaccine by Monday, November 2nd, which is, coincidentally, the day before the 2020 election. The CDC issued directives to all (50) states to prepare to di…
Read full storyHighgate Cemetery arrested for breaking 'Rule of Six'
A foaming nutjob from the Metropolitan Police has announced, today, that they will publicly arrest Highgate Cemetery in London for breaking the new 'Rule of Six', which comes into force on Monday. "It's a public place!" they announced. "And there'…
Read full storyFate of Belarus rests in chess game
The President of Belarus has agreed to a cut-throat game of chess with a person who has titled himself as the Keeper of Death. Pundits believe that Alexander Lucashenko has been pressured into the match by corporate heavyweights including Apple, IBM…
Read full storyPanic In Times Square As Car Door Slams, And Balloon Bursts
NYPD officers were called to an incident in New York's Times Square this morning, after a man rather unnecessarily slammed a taxi cab door, and a child's balloon burst nearby. People all around dived for cover, hitting the ground, running into sho…
Read full storyNaomi Osaka Has Achieved The First Thing On Her Childhood Wish List
Naomi Osaka, the Japanese tennis starlet who is through to the semi-finals of the Women's US Open after her victory over Shelby Rogers, has revealed that she has achieved the first item on her list of 'Three Wishes' made when she was just a little g…
Read full storyThe Middle Class Guide to the School Run
Now that schools have reopened after our long lockdown, it appears that a growing number of parents have simply forgotten basic manners or, in some cases, what a car is. Here's a simple guide Where Park your ugly planet-killing 4x4 wherever…
Read full storyJon Gosselin of Jon and Kate Plus 8, Denies That He is Physically Involved With Miley Cyrus
WYOMISSING, Pennsylvania – (Celebrity Satire) - The former star of the TLC reality show “Jon and Kate Plus 8”, is denying that he and singer Miley Cyrus are an item. Jon Gosselin, 43, ex-husband of Aerosmith’s Stephen Tyler’s ex-girlfriend, Kate G…
Read full storyThe Lincoln Project Says President Trump is Misappropriating Taxpayers Money Like Crazy
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – There is no anti-Trump group that the Electoral College president hates more than the Lincoln Project. For one thing, every member is a Republican; and a Republican who knows that Donnie boy has about as much busine…
Read full storyThe NFL Football Season Finally Kicks Off
KANSAS CITY - (Sports Satire) - The NFL season finally kicked off at Kansas City's Arrowhead Stadium, which will soon be changed to The 7th Cavalry Stadium. The St.Louis Outlooker News noted that the namechange will be to appease the Red Lives Ma…
Read full storyKeeping Up With The Kardashians Has Just Been Named The #1 American Show in China
HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – The matriarch of the highly popular reality show “Keeping Up With The Kardashians,” Kris Jenner, has just been given some good news by her agent. Mama Jenner, 64, the brains behind television’s top reality show, has bee…
Read full storyPresident Trump Lays Down His Personal Rules for the Upcoming Television Presidential Debate with Joe Biden
CHICKEN CREEK, Kentucky – (Satire News) – The president was in the “Chicken Shit Capital of the World” holding yet another “Maskless Non-Self-Distancing” presidential campaign hate rally. Chicken Creek produces more chicken droppings than all of t…
Read full storyLarge Hadron Collider: sex appeal
The CERN Large Hadron Collider has been acclaimed by the worldwide scientific community as a brave move forward for humanity. Now its appeal has broadened to include the sexiest people in tinsel town. Yes, Hollywood. Women such as Halle Berry and…
Read full storyBob Woodward Is President Of The United States
Who knew? All this time, Bob Woodward, author of All the President’s Men, was President of the United States! Donald Trump said, “If I really, really told Bob Woodward coronavirus was serious, why didn’t HE make that announcement? Why did HE keep…
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