The Golden Globe Awards: Charlie Sheen, Brad Pitt, and Cher All Agree That The Show's Host Ricky Gervais Was "A Pompous Pathetic Punk"
BEVERLY HILLS - The International Ballroom of The Beverly Hills Hotel was the sight of The 68th Annual Golden Globes Award Show which was hosted by Ricky Gervais, a razor-tongued, venom-spewing comedian who can literally make Joan "The Moan" Rivers...
Read full storyRush Limbaugh Once Again Denies The Gay Rumors
SAN FRANCISCO - Tittle Tattle Tonight, the television news program that asks the questions that even the National Enquirer reporters forgot to ask has managed to get an interview with the foremost GOP mouthpiece Rush Limbaugh who is the host of his o...
Read full storyHouse of Lords all-night sitting to last until Sun enters Aquarius on Thursday morning
London - (Filibuster Biz): In Westminster tonight members of the House of Lords have hunkered down for the first all-nighter in a decade. They have been told the talking will not stop until the deed is done - which at the current pace is unlikely...
Read full storyGreen Hornet Actor Caught in Sting Operation!
Eddie Furlong, who has a role in the new Green Hornet movie, has been arrested for getting too close to his ex-wife and violating a court ordered restraining order. After several complaints from Furlong's former wife, Rachael Kneeland, the police...
Read full storyKelsey Grammer Often Dresses as a Woman
A split with his wife, Camille, has led her to reveal that Kelsey Grammer often dresses up like a woman and even goes out to clubs. "He has a really good make-up person he goes to and wears ladies underwear, heels and the whole nine yards", Camill...
Read full storyBerlusconi with miners - he is the pits!
Details are emerging that Italian Prime Minister, Silvio Berlusconi has been secretly frequenting Italian coal mines scouting for young miners. A supervisor at the mine confirmed that he had made many visits, saying that he liked to go down with...
Read full storyChurch of England to scrap membership fees
Falling congregations have forced the Church of England to scrap the controversial membership scheme that was brought in last year. The membership fees which ranged from the £100 per year one star service (To be thought of kindly come judgement da...
Read full storyFailed pipe bomber turns himself in
Thames Valley Police this evening disclosed that a suspected anarchist has handed himself in at Reading police station, following a dismal failure to spread murder and mayhem around central London and the home counties. It was announced that the s...
Read full storyGay Man Shaves a Monkey's Arse
A gay man raised thousands of pounds for a local charity by offering to shave a monkey's arse. For free. Larry Sabu, 20, a regular visitor to gay bars and male brothels on the high street, spent an evening in his house shaving the monkey's arse wi...
Read full storyGay Man Pulls Micky, Willy and then Dangles Cock from Trousers
A gay man was given a stern ticking-off from the local judge yesterday after being caught causing a public nuisance. Larry Sabu, 20, was in a slightly drunken haze after a night's entertainment at the Blue Oyster Bar, when he stumbled down the str...
Read full storyTabby Cat has been summoned to do jury service in the United States
Suffolk Superior Crown Court, Boston, United States: Only in America, the land of the free and the brave, would a Tabby Cat be been summoned to do jury service. In compliance with the US judicial system website, jurors are "not expected to speak...
Read full storyFox News Remembers Fallen "Patriots"
New York, NY - A somber mood has fallen over the employees at Fox News, as the nation's leading cable news network is spending the day remembering a group of Patriots that were brutally murdered Sunday evening in Foxborough, MA. Sources close to the...
Read full storyNew national daily newspaper launch hailed as a great success
The launch of the UK's first all new daily national newspaper since The Independent has been hailed as a great success by the owners, the editorial team and, more crucially, the readers. Retailing at £0.07p per copy, The Daily Cyst promises to del...
Read full storyShylock Humes: The hound of the Basketvills: Part 2
After a good nights sleep, Shylock rang the servants bell on his bedroom wall. After a short while, there was a knock on the door. "Come in" Shouted Shylock. A toothless old crone entered the room. "You rang sir". "Yes, would it be possible to have a towel for my morning ablutions?" Enquired Shylock. "No sir", the woman replied, "its out". "Well what about soap?" Asked Shylock. "Graves is...
Read full storyWikileaks releases Ten Commandments
Today, a remorseful ex-employee of Wikileaks released secret documents about the company to the press. Journalists are still sifting through the mountain of paper to find out if there is anything interesting. So far the best thing they have found is this list of Ten Commandments which Julian Assange gave to all his employees. 1. Thou shalt kiss the ass of Julian Assange and worship his smarm...
Read full storyGay Man Sucks A Werthers
There was controversy in a town centre this evening when shoppers in Manchester's Arndale Centre were treated to a sight not often seen in the complex - a gay man sucking another man's penis! Police were called to the first floor of the Arndale at...
Read full storyApple boss forgot what his mum told him?
Apple boss Steve Jobs may be one of the most powerful guys in the world of computer technology (and richest), but he forgot one thing that his mum told him many years ago: "An apple a day keeps the quack away!" Now the boss of all Apple is bei...
Read full storyBerlusconi never paid young girls for sex, they just did it?
Italian PM, Berlusconi claims he never paid young, under-aged beauties for sex they just did it because he's so wonderful, he looks like a sun-tanned adonis and he's very rich and powerful (!), so why should he pay for something the young bimbo's wan...
Read full storyApple releases iSmell app to follow Iris scanning technology
Apple computers hinted at the forthcoming release of their iSmell app for iPhone4 and iPad last week when they released the Eye-Eye iris scanner and provided more details this week. Arthur Ramsbottom at the Apple Research Centre in Cleckheaton, Y...
Read full storyLondon's Olympic Stadium in danger of Sinking into its own Footprint!
London's Hackney Marshes is basically a swampland. It always has been. For many decades nothing was built on it other than the odd wooden changing room sheds for amateur league football players to get into their kit before playing their matches on the wide expanse of the marshes at weekends. I grew up in Hackney myself. The goalposts during matches played on rain soaked days would sin...
Read full storyIsle of Man NOT Stolen
Reacting to alarmist reports that the Isle of Man, sometimes pronounced Mull, had been stolen, several prominent inhabitants of the island have written to the Spoof to assure a worried public that they have not been stolen, they have been bought!...
Read full storyNHS safe with Cameron
Echoing the trenchant defence of the health service by Margaret Thatcher David Cameron announced today: 'The NHS is safe in our hands.' As if anyone would think that the National Health Service was not safe in the hands of those who have always c...
Read full storyIs Jo killer 'a devious bastard' who planted evidence in her flat?
Bristol - (Crimebotch): Did Jo Yeates really return home with her food shopping - or were her coat, boots, mobile phone and keys 'planted' by an evil killer and/or accomplice who then helped themselves to her TV dinner? A Crimebotch reconstruction...
Read full storyThe Isle of Mull is stolen
The Isle of Mull, home to the Mull of Kintyre (made famous by Paul McCartney's dirge) and Tobomory (which gained fame as the children's TV show Balamory), has been stolen. The first anybody knew of the theft was when the SatNav on the Mull Ferry a...
Read full storyRight To Life Barricade Jelly Baby manufacturer
Harry-Beau, the makers of the popular confectionery, Jelly Babies, are suffering currently after a series of serious attacks from Right To Life, the anti-abortion group. Right To Life appear to have got the wrong end of the stick from a recent adv...
Read full storyBarcelona sues J K Rowling
Mayor of Barcelona Jordi Hereu, has issued court proceedings in Spain against J K Rowling author of the Harry Potter saga. In her stories it is claimed that Rowling stole the name of the major thoroughfare of Barcelona, which is Avenida Diagonal,...
Read full storyHistory Review: The End Of Byzantium, by Jonathan Harris.
Constantinople fell to the Turks on May 29, 1453 - the last embers of the Roman Empire were finally extinguished. Ken Lucid considers this latest retelling of the end of a very long story... Leeds railway station, Friday morning. A two-and-a-bit hours ride back to London after a conference... Girondins and Jacobins, I seem to remember. Scintillating stuff. Anyway, I was knackered. Completel...
Read full storyDragon's Den new line up
The new line up for Dragon's Den 2011 has been revealed with a dramatic change to the cast of entrepreneurs. Richard Branson will lead the team but will limit his investments to anything that can be deflowered or is red. Gordon Brown will part...
Read full storyiPad 2 Rumors - Starbucks App Coffee Dispenser
Leading on from this morning's news over on Mashable that the next iPhone and iPad will have a Dual-Core Graphics Chip, we have had confirmation that the new iPad will incorporate a coffee dispenser for use with the iPad Starbucks app. Fanbois wil...
Read full storyKew Gardens a hotbed of vice as manager pulled in prostitution scam
West London - (Reuterus): Topless pics of the corpulent ugly-mug were found on a Royal Botanical Gardens laptop at the weekend. They showed 35 year-old Helen Marsters frolicking naked while running Kew Gardens visitor centre. Today the pug-fac...
Read full storyNew Irish Prime Minister to be Michael O'Leary of RyanAir
With the Irish economy on meltdown (+25% VAT), the members of the Dail - the Irish Parliament, have accepted RyanAir chief executive Michael O'Leary as their new Premier. Former Prime Minister Brian Cowan agreed that Mr O'Leary was the perfect cho...
Read full storyItalian PM Makes Lusty Defence
Silky Berlustconi, 71, Italian Prime Minisister has denied all suggestions that he paid for sex with the Robber of Hearts Creamy El Myrug 17, also known as Buby Rubacocky, Miranda Myplace and Stella Wetdream. Silky said he would feel degraded if h...
Read full storyKatie Price Tired Of Alex Reid Stealing Her Limelight
Vacuous marriage hound, Katie Price, has sensationally accused her current husband Alex Reid of trying to edge in on her fame. As the 'Reidinator', or 'dipshit' as most people know him as, clung tightly to her coattails, Price accused Reid of vari...
Read full storyVAT Survey Carried Out in Nottingham
A survey carried out in Nottingham, to ascertain the views and queries about VAT (Value Added Tax) and it's increase to 20%, was carried out this week by the Spoofs Gazette. Here are some of the more printable responses: Grizelda Ondrugs (short skirted lady on the corner of the street): "Oh yea... it a shame innit?" Donald Cluck (Security Guard at Tesco, Hucknall): "Ther're all %ankers,...
Read full storyAn Interview With T.V Medium Eric Pakora
We walk into the Nuneaton Golf and Country Club with a sense of apprehension. We are here to meet Eric Pakora, TV medium and top chef of Indian cuisine at local takeaway, Mohan's. Pakora rose to fame on Living TV's Most Flaunted, a documentary style ghost hunting extravaganza, hosted by Nannette Meadowing, previously seen on children's entertainment programme Blue Peter. Most Flaunted gai...
Read full storyInchock's Confession
We thought it was time to explain the reasons behind the lack of social skills, and demented views of Spoof Reporter Inchcock Chambers. This ode is produced with the full permission of the bald headed idiot. (Easy how the bribe of promising to send him an email each day for a week so he can imagine he has some friends, can change his mind, the fool!) Explanations to my Friends (Both of...
Read full storyWorries over Samantha Cameron - the woman behind our Nepotistic... I mean National Coalition Government!
David Cameron is a direct descendant of King William IV and his mistress Dorothea Jordan. This illegitimate line consists of five generations of women on his father's maternal side starting with Elizabeth Hay, Countess of Erroll née FitzClarence,...
Read full storyDr. Watson Says IBM Computer Stole His Name
Sherlock Holmes is trying to calm Dr. Watson down. No luck. As the IBM computer Watson (the company says it's named for IBM founder Thomas J. Watson) gets a lot of attention in the news for appearing as a contestant on the TV show Jeopardy, Dr. Wa...
Read full storyDied & Seek
A voluptuously vivacious vixen is jogging with her pet Golden Laboratory Retriever along the beach as if she was the Road Runner being chased by Wiley Coyote. Which explains why when she runs through a dark, poorly lit, abandoned train tunnel; the other joggers (bedecked in Acme labeled cross trainers) following behind her suddenly change directions. They are probably worrying that they will smack...
Read full storyHeidi Montag Confesses That She'd Like To Have A Menage-A-Trois With Robert Pattinson And Taylor Lautner
SAN FRANCISCO - Heidi Montag was having dinner at the famed Sardine Sally's Fish Diner on Fisherman's Wharf when she was approached by Evelyn Tammy Quillhoop, a reporter for The Left Coast Mirror Magazine. Quillhoop asked Montag if the rumor about...
Read full storyOh where, oh where has dear Arnie gone? Oh where, oh where can he be?
Indeed, where IS our dear Arnie since he bowed out of politics - or the limelight of politics? Rumour has it that he has recently auditioned for the part of Rocky Balboa in the upcoming "Rocky the XXth" movie. When asked about this rumour, Sl...
Read full story"The Jersey Shores" JWoww And "Growing Up Kardashian's" Kim Kardashian Give Each Other 'Lip Service'
NEW YORK CITY - One of the stars of the reality show The Jersey Shore, JWoww has come out swinging against one-third of the infamous Kardashian sisters, Kim. According to Tittle Tattle Tonight JWoww is extremely upset that KimKar is denying that s...
Read full storyThe Day My Friend's Head Exploded
It was a funny day. Not in a; 'funny ha-ha!' way - a bit more like a: 'What the hell was that all about? That was really horrible!' way. Strange day, the day my mate's head exploded. When I say 'my mate,' I don't mean that too literally; I mean, I never invited him to come round to my place and kip on the sofa or anything. Or ever loaned him my last tenner - nothing like that. But I knew him, a...
Read full storyHomosexuals of America Sue TSA: Pat Downs Are Not Invasive Enough
The Homosexuals of America Organization has announced that it is in the process of suing the TSA over concerns that the pat downs that are performed on fliers who refuse to go through the body scans are not invasive enough. "The TSA is just not do...
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