Hip-Hop Rapper's Neck Snaps Under Weight of Gold Chain Necklace
Myron Skimsdale, otherwise known on stage as "Heavy G" suffered what was first reported as a serious neck injury while performing on stage in Miami when the momentum of his gold chain managed to snap hard to the right, taking his neck with it. Hea...
Read full storyOh no, it's the f***ing X-Factor again
Yes, it's the show where the girls sing like guys and the guys sing like girls, and it's time for iThink's bitchy round-up of this evening's action. This week there were notable performances by Matt Cardle, Treyc Cohen and of course W/Vagner. "...
Read full storyIndian Spoofers Having Hey Day with Fox Newscasters
Indian media outlets are much less discerning when it comes to reporting real news and has allowed some high-profile spoofers' stories to pass as real news. And, as usual, Fox News and other right wingnuts are taking the bait, hook, line and sinker.
Read full storyChris Moyles Urges Listeners To Vote For X-Factor's Wagner - That's Fuc*ed It!
Radio One breakfast show presenter Chris Moyles was branded as "an interfering, fat tub of Leeds lard" by irate internet campaigners over the weekend as he appealed for listeners to his show to vote for Wagner Carrilho on the X-Factor. Sources say...
Read full storySusan Boyle ITV interview with Piers Morgan
Susan Boyle has not been an interesting interviewee. That is, until tonight, on ITV. Many of Susan's most fanatical followers will disagree with that first sentence but they are wrong. Susan gave a fascinating interview, in which she told her story, her trials and tribulations and her explanation of her behaviour through good and bad times. We had a glimpse of her younger life and signifi...
Read full storyX-Factor Furore As Wagner Walks In On Naked Mary
Saucy Wagner Carillho has been carpeted once again by X-Factor bosses after walking in on a naked Tesco Mary Byrne, then sitting on her bed and refusing to move until she allowed him to sing 'She Bangs!' by Ricky Martin. Sources say that Tesco Mar...
Read full storyGeorge Bush Says Sarah Palin Is Not Qualified To Be President - Palin Remarks, "Well Gee Willikers Why Not? I Can Pee Standing Up Just Like All The Guy Presidents Do"
DALLAS - Former President George W. Bush has caused a mini-political tsunami by making a statement about Senator John McCain's 2008 Presidential Campaign running mate Sarah Palin. Bush, who threw out the ceremonial first pitch at one of the Texas...
Read full storyBees May Hold Secret to Fourth Dimension
Remember the year the bees all but disappeared? Not many were left and beekeepers were beside themselves wondering if their livelihoods had been taken from them forever, only to realize a year later that the bees were back. Where did they go? Quan...
Read full storyJimmie Johnson Outperforms Zenyatta to Win Breeders' Cup!
(Louisville, Kentucky) - NASCAR Sprint Cup driver Jimmie Johnson blew past the field to win the Breeders' Cup at Churchill Downs. "I really need to thank my team for this big win," said Johnson, age 35. Meanwhile, the 6-year-old mare Zenyatta e...
Read full storyHalf-a-Million Ohioans Squeeze into Air-Tight Chamber
In a rather bold experiment earlier this week, an assortment of roughly half-a-million Ohio voters fit themselves inside a vacuum chamber in order to not have their voices be heard. The event's organizer, Vespa Sillyrabbit (who goes by the name "W...
Read full storyGunpowder Plot a Damp Squib
Guido Forks just keeps on digging. He is sure that eventually be will succeed in getting under the House of Commons. However it is clear he hasn't got there yet as his fireworks this year have missed Parliament by a mile. He hit Eros instead! Fork...
Read full storyChina Taking Over U.S. Banks, Why They Are Constantly Changing Names!
In case you are wondering why your local banks are constantly changing names from traditional names to ones with names like PSB, First Fifth and Our Citizens First, it is because China is steadily taking over United States banks one at a time. The...
Read full storyQueen Talks to the BBC
Fears that the strike at the BBC over Pensions might spread throughout the Corporation and continue into 2011 have led the Queen to intervene. 'My Christmas message is in danger' she said 'the people are used to hearing me on Christmas Day and bei...
Read full storyLady Gaga Tells Reporters "The Adventure Of Uncle Dildo!"
Some reporters were bantering around with Lady Gaga this week according to a competitor of 'The West Coast Post' and it led them to ask The Lady why she loves to do outrageous things. Is it all for attention? "Not exactly... although they do help...
Read full storyBackup Group Finds Susan Boyle Crawling On Floor With White Butt Sticking Out
Susan Boyle, the excellent Scottish singer, has a way with getting into trouble when she's on the road doing shows. "Well I showed it this time! Why these things always happen to me, I don't know", stated Boyle to a friend who had came to see her...
Read full storyRielle Hunter Doing Some California Cheating On John "The Cheater" Edwards
LOS ANGELES - Senator John Edwards' baby mama, Rielle Hunter was in Los Angeles supposedly on a shopping spree. But from all accounts, it appears that the shopping spree was not for clothes, but for a new male to replace her boyfriend Senator John Ed...
Read full storyCommunications Director Not Communicating
Andy Coulson, David Cameron's Communications Director was uncommunicative today when your intrepid reporter asked him some questions. Just back from the Police Station I clearly upset Coulson by calling him at a time of personal distress. His Budg...
Read full storyIn India, US Prez Obama gets 1-gun salute during Mumbai visit
MUMBAI: POTUS Prez Obama had just finished his vacuous, limpid speech at the iconic Taj hotel in this heavily fortified city. Having paid lip-service to fighting terrorism together and voicing other gratuitous statements Obama and his security detai...
Read full storySomali Pirates to buy Manchester City
Mega-wealthy Somali pirates are set to buy Manchester City from current owner Sheikh Mansoor. At an estimated cost of 500 million the pirate consortium lead by Captain Jamel Sparrow will take control of the club before the Manchester derby against...
Read full storyExclusive - Wagner Carillho To Drop Out Of X-Factor Due To Arse Problem
Skoob Entertainment News can exclusively reveal that Wagner Carillho, the kung-fu kicking, pony tailed, Brazilian crooner is to drop out of the X-Factor show due to an arse problem. Despite a spirited rendition of Elvis Presley's 'Viva Rock Vegas'...
Read full storyPrince Harry paternity is no state secret Andy Coulson tells cops
London - (Reuterus): The Prime Monster's spin doctor Andy Coulson has thumbed his nose at all the questions. Routine News of the Screws bugging of 'royal' mobiles had been no different to eavesdropping on fake shaikhs, the ex-redtop editor claimed...
Read full storyOlbermann May Return After Anger Management Classes
NEW YORK (AP) Several days after indefinitely suspending Keith Olbermann, host of the popular 'Countdown' program, MSNBC issued a press release outlining the conditions for his possible return. In addition to completing a course on anger managemen...
Read full storyLocal Man Confuses Indian Telemarketer
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, of Brokeback Mansions, Portsmouth today revealed how he had become desperate after being plagued by phone calls from telemarketers based on the Indian sub-continent. An irate Shuttlecock described how telemarketing c...
Read full storyExclusive - Wayne Rooney Will Never Play For Manchester United Again
As Wayne Rooney jets off to Nike HQ in the USA, as opposed to training hard for Wednesday's Manchester derby, sources state that he will never pull on the famous old red shirt of Manchester United again. It is being reported in certain 'informed'...
Read full storyDLT to be Wookie
Beloved former DJ Dave Lee 'The Hairy Cornflake' Travis is set to star in a Pantomime version of Star Wars. Many former DJ's will feature, including Pat 'High 5' Sharp as Luke Skywalker, Noel Edmonds as Han Solo and Keith Chegwin as Jedi Master Yo...
Read full storyElectric Chairs 'Create Einsteins'
[ALABAMA - PSE) After research from Oxford University scientists published this week found that applying a tiny electrical current to the brain can make people better at learning maths, evidence has now emerged from the USA that the last few moments...
Read full storyAmerican Robin shellacks Northern Cardinal in Ohio's state bird election due to widespread voter apathy
Just as the GOP seized the Governor's seat, Senate seat, and 13 of 18 House of Representative seats on November 2nd, the American Robin displaced the Northern Cardinal as Ohio's state bird this past week. The cardinal, Cardinalis Cardinalis, had h...
Read full storyRIP "Ready Steady Cook"
My name is Ainsley Harriott, Chef of Chefs: Look on my plight, Greg Wallace, and despair! No viewer now remains. They all have fled For roller-coaster dumbed-down sensations And US-style cheap-thrill bedazzlements. This is the age of change. N...
Read full story'Arsenal's Arsene an Arse'
Arsene Wenger, Arsenballs 61 year old manager, is saying little about the lorry which fell on his train after he had discussed terms with a couple of young Woking players. Suggestions that he is 'an arse' to talk to a non league side are being dea...
Read full storyCraze Of Incredible Bouncing Toddlers
A new craze is sweeping Paris after an 18-month-old toddler survived a fall from a seventh-storey window. The nipper landed in a cafe awning and bounced into the arms of a passer-by. The passer-by who made the spectacular catch was Dr Philippe...
Read full storyBritish Army will no longer carry weapons into battle
In late breaking news, it has been announced that the British Army will no longer march into battle carrying weapons. The Ministry of Defence has received several complaints from members of the Taliban in Afghanistan. The complaints describe the t...
Read full storyHashirma Part II
Jews, finding it difficult to swallow the stale bread, needed this stuff to wash the bread down. Therefore, female Jews would tip-toe to a responsive Moslem home and timidly knock on the gate, waiting for ages outside to be attended to. When the Jewish female made her request clear, i.e., buying some sour liquid, the Moslem female unhurriedly would fetch some. Then the Moslem female, frowning, wou...
Read full storyPatsy Kensit Has Reportedly Stated That She Would Love To Marry Kylie Minogue
LONDON - Patsy Kensit who starred in Lethal Weapon 2, Blame It On The Bellboy, and Godzilla Vs. Great Britain confided to a reporter for The Manchester Morning Manc that she finds Kylie Minogue to be a very physically attractive woman. Patsy, who...
Read full storyMSNBC Seems Surprised By Olbermann's Campaign Donations
Washington--Keith Olbermann was suspended by MSNBC because he donated campaign money to Democrats. "I was shocked to find out that Mr. Olbermann donated money to a Democrat. We hired him to be unbiased." A NBC spokesman said in press release given...
Read full storyCheryl Cole Reveals That Her Amazing Smile Is Courtesy Of Boyfriend Derek "The Dancing Dude" Hough
LONDON - Cheryl Cole, one of the judges on the British reality show X-Factor was asked why she has been all smiles as of late. Chezza, as the English affectionately call her, shyly blushed and noted that her quick trip to Los Angeles to visit with...
Read full storyOil Companies Thank Americans for Voting Republican by Raising Gas Prices
New York--Oil Companies wanted to thank Americans for helping elect Republicans by raising gas prices. The higher gas prices are due to the fact that oil companies don't have to worry about any regulations or new environmental tax increases. "I w...
Read full storyPresident Obama Invites Charlie Sheen, Mel Gibson, and Paris Hilton To The White House
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a move that many are calling simply a well-timed political move, President Barack Obama has sent out invitations to Charlie Sheen, Mel Gibson, and Paris Hilton to attend a good old-fashioned wienie roast in the backyard of the W...
Read full storyQueen Furious To Miss Pompey As She Bids Farewell To Ark Royal
It was almost more than the great royal heart could stand - not only was she bidding farewell to her navy's flagship, but she had to miss her other great love. HM the Queen visited HMS Ark Royal at Portsmouth yesterday to say "goodbye" to the grea...
Read full storyTaylor Lautner & Taylor Swift Had Planned To Elope!
It has just been released in an interview with Taylor Swift that she and actor Taylor Lautner had planned to elope early this year but changed their minds at the last minute. Taylor was being interviewed for a TV Special and she let the secret out...
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