Exclusive - Wagner Carillho To Drop Out Of X-Factor Due To Arse Problem

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Saturday, 6 November 2010

image for Exclusive - Wagner Carillho To Drop Out Of X-Factor Due To Arse Problem
Arse Related Problems - A Modern Malaise

Skoob Entertainment News can exclusively reveal that Wagner Carillho, the kung-fu kicking, pony tailed, Brazilian crooner is to drop out of the X-Factor show due to an arse problem.

Despite a spirited rendition of Elvis Presley's 'Viva Rock Vegas' (Or was that the Flintstones? Ed) on Saturday night's live 'American Anthems' themed show.

Our source has told us that Wagner is gutted at having to drop out, especially considering the massive Farcebook campaign aimed at winning him votes and gaining the lucrative Xmas number one spot.

But sadly, it appears that a problem with his arse, which has its origins in his native Brazil, has forced him to confide in mentor 'Mad Mental' Louis Walsh that the show simply cannot go on.

Sources state that they are unsure of what the exact nature of Wagner's arse problem is, because he doesn't really like to talk about it much, but it seems to be a generally agreed concensus that there's 'something slightly awry with the internal plumbing up there.'

It is thought that Wagner suffered a reccurrence of the problem whilst performing Ricky Martin's 'She Bangs!' on a previous show.

Fellow contestant, 'Tesco Mary' Byrne reportedly said:

"It's a crying shame for the poor fella. We're all gutted for 'im. Especially that nice Katie Waissel."

More as we get it.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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