Guns smuggled into House of Commons

Funny story: Guns smuggled into House of Commons

London - (Arsenal): A routine scan has found dozens of small firearms and handguns have been smuggled into the Palace of Westmonster ahead of next Wednesday's State Opening of the Can of Worms, er...Parliament! Covert CCTV equipment and metal dete...

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Christo to Rebuild Berlin Wall

Funny story: Christo to Rebuild Berlin Wall

Berlin - German Chancellor Angela Merkel has announced that installation artist Christo and his partner Jeanne-Claude have been awarded the commission to commemorate the twentieth anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall based on the results of an...

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Bonkettes Break Silence - Make Statement

Funny story: Bonkettes Break Silence - Make Statement

In a hastily convened press conference at the Inn On The Park Hotel, in London's Park Lane (Just off Park Lane actually, but that's splitting hairs) the manager of the numero uno girl band in the world, the Bonkettes, BT Bishop announced that the gir...

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Brown returns to Berlin to do stand-up show

Funny story: Brown returns to Berlin to do stand-up show

After the feeble sight of UK Prime Minister grovelling to the Germans in their capital city of Berlin this week, Mr. Brown's more famous rude and sarcastic nature resurfaced today, and he promptly flew back to Berlin to give the people there a stand-...

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Chelsea to drop Terry to the bench.

Funny story: Chelsea to drop Terry to the bench.

A spokesman for Chelsea F.C have claimed. "We're demoting John Terry," a reporter for The Sun had asked what they meant by 'demoting' and the spokesman had replied. "We're benching him until we get Roman to give us the 40m we need to sign Steven Tayl...

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Rival Football Fans At A Loss To Explain Hatred Of Eachother

Funny story: Rival Football Fans At A Loss To Explain Hatred Of Eachother

The footballing world was brought to a near standstill today, as rookie journalist Anthony Abdul Gonzales dared ask a question that is seldom ever talked about. Why do rival football fans hate each other? Interviewing a special panel of supporters...

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Bordello Falls Soundtrack Row Rumbles On

Funny story: Bordello Falls Soundtrack Row Rumbles On

An almighty row has broken out here among the musical community regarding the soundtrack for the upcoming Quentin Tarantino adaptation of Spoof magazine saga Bordello Falls. Some commentators say that Ennio Morricone should be rewarded with the pr...

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Dancing With The Stars: Susan Boyle Very Unhappy That Two Dancers Danced As She Sang

Funny story: Dancing With The Stars: Susan Boyle Very Unhappy That Two Dancers Danced As She Sang

HOLLYWOOD - Susan Boyle sang her heart out on Dancing With The Stars and the audience rewarded her by giving her a standing ovation. She later confided to British judge Len Goodman that she did not appreciate the couple dancing while she was singi...

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Amazonian Indians cause Brazilian blackout and all night sex-orgies!

Funny story: Amazonian Indians cause Brazilian blackout and all night sex-orgies!

The worst blackout in the history of Brazil occurred yesterday causing chaos, havoc, pillaging, rioting, murdering, non-stop copulating in the open in Rio and Sao Paulo. The cities were completely BLACK and everybody took the opportunity to DO IT!...

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Kirsty Alley Wedged In Revolving Door

Funny story: Kirsty Alley Wedged In Revolving Door

American celebrity and one time 'Cheers' star Kirsty Alley came to grief during a London break when she got jammed in a revolving door at the world famous Harrods of Knightsbridge department store. What should have been a fun day out shopping for...

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Jay Leno's Ratings Continue Slip-Sliding Downward

Funny story: Jay Leno's Ratings Continue Slip-Sliding Downward

CLEVELAND - NBC host of The Jay Leno Show, Jay Leno was in town hosting The Save Lake Erie From Going Dry Telethon. Leno was asked how many automobiles he has now. And the man with the anabolic steroid-looking chin replied that he had about 200,...

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Ode to Joyce

Joyce, you thunderous god-like beauty! Daughter of your sister's Mum; Every day I find you working, In the midst of Tesco's hum! Thy enchantments bind together, What did customers' surge divide, Beggars stealing Tennent's super, Will your matronly charms abide. You embrace a million shoppers! Oh take my kiss wondrous old girl! Eagle-eyed attendant shepherd, Keep your checkout tills...

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PsychoTown - Part 4

Funny story: PsychoTown - Part 4

Psycho Town Recap: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 O' Halloran bursts through the door of the Lieutenants office while the fat man stuffs his fat face with a big fat slice of pizza. "What the fuck are you bursting in here like that for?!", shouts Lieutenant Kowalski, spitting bits of sausage and cheese all over his messy desk. "Shut the fuck up, Lieutenant", O' Halloran answers back sharply, "...

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Britney Spears Lies Low After Aussie Mime Jibes

Funny story: Britney Spears Lies Low After Aussie Mime Jibes

Following widespread condemnation and walk-outs by Aussie audiences during her 'Circus' tour because she was miming and that big-screens malfunctioned, Britney Spears has gone into hiding in tha hope that the clamour will eventually tail off. Spea...

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Eddie Murphy en route to the White House?

Funny story: Eddie Murphy en route to the White House?

Comic actor Eddie Murphy is said to be considering a move into politics. The star of Beverley Hills Cop and Norbit is keen to add his considerable voice to the issues troubling America. Said a friend: "He had dinner with Schwarchenegger who tol...

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Male Wax Law Passed By Congress

Funny story: Male Wax Law Passed By Congress

At first it was regarded as a silly joke. A punchline around the cocktail circuit, "ain't never going to happen." But the Brazilian Male Wax Law gained sufficient support in both houses of Congress, to catapult into law as an amendment attached to th...

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Hollywood Announces San Francisco Based "Little House" Spin-off

Funny story: Hollywood Announces San Francisco Based "Little House" Spin-off

Hollywood announced a new mid-season replacement series that will begin showing on television in January. It is another series based loosely on the famous Laura Ingalls Wilder books. This new show will be based on a non-traditional, politically cor...

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John And Edward To Appear On Coronation Street

Funny story: John And Edward To Appear On Coronation Street

X-Factor's Jedward, John and Edward Grimes are all set to make their acting debut on Britain's most popular soap, Coronation Street. The show's producers, anxious as ever to keep a finger on the nation's pulse swung a deal for the Dublin duo to ap...

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Call Of Duty - Modern Warfare 2 All Set To Shoot Up The Game Chart

Funny story: Call Of Duty - Modern Warfare 2 All Set To Shoot Up The Game Chart

The computer console game, 'Call Of Duty - Modern Warfare 2' looks all set to smash previous game sales following its release this week. In the UK, gamers started queuing up at around midnight in order to get their hands on a copy, many dressed as...

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Degree in Shit Shoveling Introduced

Funny story: Degree in Shit Shoveling Introduced

The University of Derby has announced its intention to introduce a full-time Bachelor of Arts program in the management and distribution of horse shit, available to undergraduates from 2010 onwards. In a posting on the University's website, Vice-C...

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True Purpose of Gloves finally Discovered

Funny story: True Purpose of Gloves finally Discovered

The results of a ten year study into gloves by technicians and scientists at Roughborough University were released today. The £6 billion government funded study announced that gloves were usually worn on or around the hands and that they serve a v...

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Met Firearms Officer shows off weapon

Funny story: Met Firearms Officer shows off weapon

Internal Investigators from London's Met Police are in uproar today after claims surfaced in the press that a firearms officer from the force's elite CO19 team had been sending saucy texts of his weapon to young ladies he met on the internet. The...

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MI5 probe dissident links to the "Fix" Factor

Funny story: MI5 probe dissident links to the "Fix" Factor

The British Security Service is investigating hysterical reports on the interweb suggesting that Al Qaeda are responsible for the Jedward phenomenon. The rumours started at the weekend after high-waisted c*ck muncher Simon Cowell blatantly rigged...

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Sir Paul McCartney & Ringo Starr To Tour Together

Funny story: Sir Paul McCartney & Ringo Starr To Tour Together

In a surprise announcement yesterday, Sir Paul McCartney and former Beatle's partner, Ringo Starr, are planning to do a tour in the United States come next summer. "Paul and I are planning to get with people soon and plan out the schedule", stated...

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Coleen Rooney Vows To Get Back Into A Size 10 Bikini Swimsuit With The Aid of A...Vibrating Bar

Funny story: Coleen Rooney Vows To Get Back Into A Size 10 Bikini Swimsuit With The Aid of A...Vibrating Bar

LONDON - Coleen Rooney gave birth to her first child Kai Wayne Buckingham Rooney on November 2. And the 23-year-old wife of Manchester United footballer Wayne Rooney says that she has made herself a promise that she will get back into a size 10 bi...

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Mick Jagger Replaces Steven Tyler from Aerosmith

Funny story: Mick Jagger Replaces Steven Tyler from Aerosmith

The music industry was turned on its ear, or perhaps better stated, its lips yesterday, following the shocking announcement of Mick Jagger as the touring replacement for Steven Tyler from Aerosmith. Music industry icons from their respective home...

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Obamba to rename war department 'Honor Killing' department

Funny story: Obamba to rename war department 'Honor Killing' department

WASHINGTON DC - White house press secretary Hairy Hiney today announced that the war department, aka defense department, would be renamed as the Honor Killing department in deference to political correctness. It is felt that this will draw a mor...

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Lindsay Lohan Seen with Big Bird after Anniversary Gala

Funny story: Lindsay Lohan Seen with Big Bird after Anniversary Gala

Riding high after a week's worth of celebrations for Sesame Street's 40th anniversary, Big Bird has been spotted out on the town with Lindsay Lohan in several exclusive clubs following the Sesame Street 40th anniversary gala. Lohan, known to have...

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Super Heroes Consider Strike Action

Funny story: Super Heroes Consider Strike Action

A Government watchdog think tank has recently released a report detailing a definitive correlation between UK crime levels and overzealous health and safety regulations. Chief executive of the watchdog, Rex Fido, 89 said: "At first we thought that...

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The X-Factor's Jedward Receive Hundreds Of TV, Movie Offers As Cowell May Ask Vote Again

Funny story: The X-Factor's Jedward Receive Hundreds Of TV, Movie Offers As Cowell May Ask Vote Again

With thousands of complaints coming in to the BBC studios over the Jedward win last week and the handling of the whole affair by Simon Cowell, reports are also coming in fast and furious of offers for movies and television shows for the pair. "It'...

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Gordon Brown: "I'm sorry dead soldier's mum can't read properly"

Funny story: Gordon Brown: "I'm sorry dead soldier's mum can't read properly"

Prime Minister Gordon Brown has hit back at claims that he was careless and insincere when writing a letter of condolence to Mrs Jacqui Janes over the death of her son, Jamie Janes. The PM said: "I'm sorry that Mrs Jones feels this way. My letter...

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Bin Laden Furious over X-Factor results, Admits to Being Bored

Funny story: Bin Laden Furious over X-Factor results, Admits to Being Bored

Notorious, cave-dwelling villain Osama Bin Laden has broken a long silence to express his fury over "Jedward" beating his personal favourite, Lucie Jones, to stay in X-factor. "This is what happens when you give everybody the right to vote. Jedwar...

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Britney Spears Planning For Next Breakdown After Aussie Disaster

Funny story: Britney Spears Planning For Next Breakdown After Aussie Disaster

Britney Spears says she may as well face it and get it over with as she plans to go with the flo and go ahead and get her next breakdown over with. "It's like that old song by the Stones, here come #19!" Apparently really down after her latest...

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Celebituaries: John Allen Muhammad

Funny story: Celebituaries: John Allen Muhammad

The man behind the headlines above the 2002 sniper attacks in and around Washington DC has been executed, after a lethal injection did exactly what it said on the tin. The shootings left sphincters in the Washington area clenched for three weeks i...

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UFO mothership crash 'sucked power' out of Itaipu dam

Funny story: UFO mothership crash 'sucked power' out of Itaipu dam

Sao Paulo - (X-Files): Nearly 100,000 Brazilian depilation salons were plunged into darkness on Tuesday, bringing bewildered customers to their carpet-burned knees as a huge power outage hit the country. Reports blamed the Brazil Air Farce for a c...

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Malawian orphans in false alert as Madonna attempts to adopt Luz family

Funny story: Malawian orphans in false alert as Madonna attempts to adopt Luz family

The government of Malawi ordered its entire stock of orphans to be spruced up this week as Madonna was spotted boarding a plane carrying a large designer bag. "I want them all lined up in rows with fresh haircuts and cheery smiles" said Minister o...

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Metropolitan Police - Dodgy Velcro shocker

Funny story: Metropolitan Police - Dodgy Velcro shocker

The Metropolitan Police have today issued a stark warning to the official supplier of 'velcro' to her Majesty's forces. In the last year they have citing 'embarrassing' situations when the velcro has failed to support officers. The first instance...

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Susan Boyle Appears On Dancing With The Stars And Sings In Spanish

Funny story: Susan Boyle Appears On Dancing With The Stars And Sings In Spanish

HOLLYWOOD - Susan Boyle the singing sensation from Scotland and runner-up in England's Britain's Got Talent wowed the California crowd as well as the home viewers with her stirring rendition of "I Dreamed A Dream" which she sang partially in Spanish.

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Dancing With The Stars Aaron Carter Booted Off The Show

Funny story: Dancing With The Stars Aaron Carter Booted Off The Show

HOLLYWOOD - Former teen idol Aaron Carter is the latest Dancing With The Stars contestant to be eliminated from the show. Carter who many felt early on was the odds-on-favorite to win did not cry this time like he has in the past when he has been...

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Scrabble Game Turns Nasty

Funny story: Scrabble Game Turns Nasty

It was supposed to be a friendly round of the much-loved family word game Scrabble, played out in the surroundings of a Thai primary school between an English teacher and his students, but what happened next turned into an ugly brawl that will long r...

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Standards and Compliance Section of HR 3962 Exposed

Funny story: Standards and Compliance Section of HR 3962 Exposed

Washington DC: The Affordable Health Care for America Act (HR 3962) has a Standards and Compliance section, beginning on page 1517. House Speaker Pelosi and House Representatives of both parties never mentioned this section during the floor debate.

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IRS Officials Discover Receipt From Obama Selling Soul to Devil

Funny story: IRS Officials Discover Receipt From Obama Selling Soul to Devil

Officials of the Internal Revenue Service were performing a required audit on the income of the President of the United States (required under the Election Reform Act of 1987). While checking Barack Hussein Obama's tax returns from the late 1990's,...

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