Scrabble Game Turns Nasty

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 11 November 2009

image for Scrabble Game Turns Nasty
That's not a word!

It was supposed to be a friendly round of the much-loved family word game Scrabble, played out in the surroundings of a Thai primary school between an English teacher and his students, but what happened next turned into an ugly brawl that will long remain in the memories of the contestants.

The teacher, Monkey Woods, originally from Hull in East Yorkshire, had invited his 'special' students to try their luck against him on the Scrabble board, an offer which they gladly took up, little realising that Woods was a wordmaster, and instigator of the famous AnagramAcronym game on the forum of the satirical news website

The game had progressed to a point of near-stalemate where it was difficult for anyone to come up with a new and valid word, when one of the Thai students, Wipai, 12, tried to use his available tiles to spell the word 'Vol', which he claimed was a shortened form of 'volume'.

Enraged, Woods told the child to remove it, or else he would 'knock ten bells' out of the lad. When Wipai refused, tempers flared, and the game was only going to end in one way.

Tiles flew in all directions, the board was folded into a shape that it was not intended to be folded into, and a window was broken. Two of the other players, Somjit and Pakorn, both 10, had to receive hospital treatment.

Speaking after the incident, Wipai told our reporter:

"It was rather foolish of me to try to dupe Mr Woods like that. He knows his stuff, and such a pathetic attempt as the one I made was stupid. I have apologised to him, and hope that he has accepted my apology in good faith."

Woods said:

"Fucking cheat."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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