New York Foreskin Museum Puts Obama On Display
The New York Foreskin Museum that opened in January of 2008 has just put the foreskin of United States President Barack Obama on display. The museum is next to the diamond district and houses the foreskins of many celebrities in the worlds of politi...
Read full storyIran has dangerous stockpile of camel dung
"Iran has enough camel dung to give you the hump" said the world's most senior expert in bull dung, who has also studied the difference between bull's and camels. At the third Annual Symposium of Shi'ites (ASS), the spokesman said "Iran having a n...
Read full storyHow To Be A Successful Politician
According to a seminar on how to be a successful politician in America, sponsored by Bail-outs.us, U.S. politicians must know or do these 5 things ... Get elected If you want to get elected you have to say, or do, whatever it takes. It helps to disregard the facts, disregard the truth, disregard right and wrong, disregard what's good for the people you represent … and lie, lie, lie. Lying is...
Read full storyUS History, if Technology Developments were Controlled by Government Agencies and Environmental Activists
Washington DC: What would life be like in the USA if the foibles of 20th century government agencies and activists, who purport to know everything and want their dictates to be the only game in town, prevailed? Robert Fulton, steam boat Clermont (1807): A PETA spokesperson said "too many Sea Kittens (fish) would be hit on the head by the paddle wheel when employing this means for moving goods.
Read full storyJonas Brothers To Tour UK With Girls Aloud And Pussycat Dolls?
London, United Province Of Europe. - We met up with a rather dishevelled pressman who admitted he'd been out 'having a good bender for four years or so' in a bar in Soho, London. "They're coming!" he told us, somewhat overenthusiastically as he staggered from pillar to post with a demented look in his eyes. "THEY'RE COMING I TELL YOU!!!" "Who, exactly are coming?" our reporting team asked as...
Read full storyParis Hilton to close
In the current economic climate, the Paris Hilton is being forced to close, announced Mr Hilton, head of Hilton Ltd. For many years the Paris Hilton has welcomed guests from all over the world, who have enjoyed its plush interior. The most expens...
Read full storyJennifer Aniston makes a deal with Devil for revenge while backstage at the Oscars; tries to hire Octu-Mom to seduce Brad Pitt away from Angelina Jolie
Hollywood, California - Having to put up with Angelina Jolie at the Oscars was hard enough for Jennifer Aniston but to endure seeing her arrive with her ex-husband, Brad Pitt? And both nominated for an Oscar, too? While she gets the job of an award...
Read full story"UFOs exist" says drunk Cockney
According to a drunk Cockney, UFOs do exist and aliens may already have landed on earth. Bert Bertson said, "Aright guvner, apples and pears! Oi've seen them UFOs with me own eyes. Oi was down the market the other day, at the butchers, and Oi had...
Read full storyGordon Ramsey A Closet Celtic Fan
Gordon Ramsey, celebrity chef, serial philanderer, foul mouthed hooligan and Scotsman has been revealed as a secret Celtic supporter. His previous claims to have been a footballer with Glasgow Rangers are now exposed as nothing more than lies. Pre...
Read full storySalman Rushdie Says Slumdog Millionaire Rediculous
The British-Indian author Salman Rushdie, who offended so many muslims that there has been a bounty on his head after publishing his book insulting Muhammad, has attacked the plot of multiple Oscar-winning film "Slumdog Millionaire" as a "patently ri...
Read full storySocial Scientists Define the Three Types of Cowboys
Research conducted by the Hubbard Museum of the American West has concluded that there are actually three different types of Cowboys in the United States. This system of measurement should be used when trying to typify any person claiming to be a Co...
Read full storyOut of Office Messages
I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all. I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from holiday on 4 April. Please be patient a...
Read full storyColombia discovers Fart hideouts
Jungle, Colombia - Colombian soldiers say they have found extensive undigested food deep in enemy troops intestines; used by farting guerrillas to throw off blood hound tracking, these farts are making a large strategic difference. Special forces...
Read full storyHouse prices rise 15.4% in heaven
House prices have risen to an all time high in heaven according to a leaked Church of England report. The average dwelling costs 179K which is shunting out many first time die'ers. Many family homes often lay empty for several years, leaving many sin...
Read full storyParliament announces 500 job cuts amongst MPs
As a serious recession hit Britain, with many businesses folding and jobs being lost, Parliament itself decided to cut about 500 MPs, in a bid to reduce costs. 'It had to happen', the Speaker of the House, Sir Reginald Gourmet, said, 'Parliament h...
Read full storyPETA members demonstrate fully clothed
PETA members demonstrate fully clothed It has come to the attention of The Spoof that, to the consternation of some people and the relief of others, leading animal-rights group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals are apparently abandoning...
Read full storyTony Blair visits Middle East
Tony Blair, the ex-prime minister of the UK, has been a UN peace envoy to the Middle East for three years now, but today visited the area for the first time. He said, "The reason I waited so long before visiting the area is because I had no idea w...
Read full storyDegree in Scousology introduced
Universities across Britain today introduced a new degree today - Scousology. New professor of Scousology at Oxford University, R A Billy, said: 'This is the way forward for education in this country, just like awarding Victoria Crosses to token n...
Read full storyPope Crushed: Ex-lover Surfaces on TheSpoof.com
His Holiness The Pope is said to be inconsolable after reports that his former lover has resurfaced as a writer for TheSpoof.com. To make matters worse the man, whose name shall no be spoken, is apparently writing vile and untrue things about the pop...
Read full storyKathleen Sebelius Appointed as New White House Dog
Kansas Governor, Kathleen Sebelius, has been appointed White house dog. The surprise announcement follows closely on the heels of another shocker from the Obama administration that it had appointed a Portuguese Water Dog as the next Secretary of Heal...
Read full storyHull City In Attempt To Sign Frank Spencer To Partner Jimmy Bullard
Beleaguered Hull City boss Phil Brown has announced he is keen to secure the loan signing of the former Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em actor and comedian Frank Spencer, in an attempt to arrest the teams current disastrous slide. Spencer, the insanely-...
Read full storyHull City Premier League Title Tilt Over, Concedes Phil Brown
Hull City manager Phil Brown has reluctantly conceded that, in the wake of his side's 2-1 home defeat to fellow strugglers Blackburn Rovers this very afternoon, the Tigers' tilt at the Premier League title is over for another season. Brown spoke t...
Read full storyOprah Winfrey to Receive Twelve Billion in Bailout Money
Sources within the White House have revealed that Barack Obama has assigned twelve billion dollars or the Bailout funds to friend Oprah Winfrey. The actress/talk show host will receive one of the first stimulus checks that is being used to bolster t...
Read full storyPope to give Jade Goody 'last frights'
London - (Bell, Book 'N' Candle Mess): Tragic reality queen Jade Goody is all set to receive the last frites (sic) after the Vatican Burger Emporium, er, Orifice of the Holy Sea!...agreed a cut of Halo! magazine's royalties income. The Max Cliffor...
Read full storyLatest Obama Cabinet Selection Problem An Illegal Alien
During his campaign, Barack Obama promised L.U.L.A.C. and other Hispanic groups that at least three of his cabinet level selections would be of Hispanic backgrounds. Governor Bill Richardson, his first choice for Commerce Secretary, withdrew due to...
Read full storyAnother royal crack deal in the pipeline as Charles heads for Pinochet fatherland
London - (Toxic Ass Mess): Non-Aligned Crack Barons Association UK CEO Charles Windsor is poised to sign the biggest narcotic deal of his life with next weekend's trip to Chile. The fake royal dynasty's Pretender saw his personal drug dealing inco...
Read full storyCherie Blair to learn to smile - with the aid of a banana
The wife of the former Prime Minister, Cherie Blair, has checked into a clinic in London for treatment for her inability to smile. Mrs Blair, whose husband wrongly invaded lots of countries, suffers from the medical condition Smilitis Cannotis, where...
Read full storyBanker's regulator's regulator to get bonus
In a sign of the spread of the bonus culture in banking, it has been announced that the people who check the work of the regulator who checks on City bonuses is also getting a bonus! "Nobody is prepared just to do a job for a basic wage these day...
Read full storyNew law makes it illegal to photograph Police
New anti-terrorism laws in place from Feb.16th. have made it illegal to photograph policemen, if the photo is "likely to be useful to a person about to commit an act of terrorism". This follows the revelation in court last month, by 4 muslim fana...
Read full storyOcto Mom Arrested for Breast Feeding Brood while Driving and Talking on Cell Phone!
San Francisco,CA/ Mother Earth News - The California Highway patrol stopped and arrested a mother of Octuplets for breast feeding her brood while driving 65 mph in the breakdown lane of a busy freeway, and talking to her publicist on a cell phone.
Read full storyIrish Bank Heist Unravels/7 Arrested But 2 Masterminds and $2M On the Loose!
Dublin, Ireland/ Banking News - A daring daylight robbery at the College Green Branch Bank of Ireland in Dublin, left the An Garda Siochana (the coppers) shaking their heads in appreciation of the craft and guile employed in the looting of the...
Read full storyPolitician to Strip Banker
A leading member of the Government has publicly vowed to strip a banker. In a speech made to an audience of zero Harriet Harmless said "I will make sure that I strip a banker. I'm going to claw everything. Those pinstripe suits look fab, but I want t...
Read full storySolitaire "not the only game in town"
Today we can reveal that solitaire is in fact not the only game in town. Extensive investigation discovered that there are a vast number of games available. Even if the initial claim was referring just to card games it would not be correct. Poker,...
Read full storyCancer Suffering From Jade Goody
Doctors today confirmed that cancer is suffering from the parasitical disease known as Jade Goody. Leading expert Dr Andi Medix said "There is no known cure. We try to starve the disease of attention, but it is just too strong." The symptoms begin...
Read full storyPaul Oakenfold Apparently "Explodes" During Live Performance
Ibiza, Spain -- Tragedy has struck the Spanish isle of Ibiza this weekend as reports trickle out that internationally renowned DJ, Paul Oakenfold, has gone missing under "mysterious circumstances." Various party-goers report that the superstar DJ...
Read full storyBank evicted from office - fondue set on the curb
NEW YORK, N.Y. - UPDATE1 Mr. Rockenfella announced today, to a large crowd on the street, that bankers here are turning to the public for a bailout. Billions of dollars just can't fill the bill for this item. "Many of us bankers here are misplaci...
Read full storyGreater Manchester Police Stretched To The Limit
Manchester, England - Greater Manchester Police today had to appeal to neighbouring police and law enforcement agencies for assistance as thousands of Mancunians spontaneously collapsed in fits of laughter following arch rivals Liverpool being trashe...
Read full storyHumans declared as "endangered species"
With the extinction of the human race becoming a very serious possibility, The Nation United, a football club based in the outer reaches of British West Bradford, has declared the human race as a protected species. Humans were placed on the endang...
Read full storyBigfoot, Yeti, And Loch Ness Monster Really Exist - Official
Oxbridgeford University Department Of Urban Mythology - Following years and years of painstaking research, scientists at Oxbridgeford University have finally confirmed that Bigfoot, the Yeti, and The Loch Ness Monster actually exist. They stated t...
Read full storyHOGS May Raise $17 Billion Selling New York State to Bolster Capital
NEW YORK, N.Y. (Doomberg) -- HOGS Holdings Plc, Europe's biggest bank by waistline size, may raise as much as 12 billion pounds ($17 billion) to bolster capital as toxic U.S. loans zap earnings, said two people behind a post office. The bank will...
Read full storyMan Eats Himself Whilst Listening To Coldplay
A man ate himself to death whilst listening to Coldplay. It's thought that the boredom became too much for him to bare. This is the first case of self-canabalism since the last Radiohead album. Gordon Bennett had just settled down in his armchair...
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