Man City sign Rolando
Is that a typo on the title? Not since Denis Law donned the famous Sky Blue shirt has there been so much excited anticipation. Rumours from the Terry Christian Man City benevolent Fund headquarters abound that Sven has just pulled off a big name fore...
Read full storySick man robs bank for medical benefits
(Seattle, WA) A downtown Seafirst bank was robbed at daybreak by a teen disguised with vegetation duct-taped to his body in imitation of a recent New Hampshire robbery.
Read full storyFlush Dimbulb: 'Ron Paul's An Idiot'
NEW YORK - Presidential hopeful, Congressman Ron Paul (R-TX), was called "an idiot" by Flush Dimbulb on his daily 'Excellence In Blabbermouthing' radio networks, 'The Flush Dimbuld Show.'...
Read full storyLike polygamist father, like polygamist son: MyFundamentalistSpace.com blamed
Utah - (Ass Mess): "And the sins of the fathers shall be visited upon the sons".... Today the words of Exodus 20:5 came crashing down on the son of Utah fundamentalist polygamist Tom Green as his 19 year old son, William Green, was jailed...
Read full storyMitt Romney's Hair Attacks Supporter
July 9, 2007 - De Moines, Iowa - A Mitt Ronmey supporter suffered minor injuries when Mitt Ronmey's hair appeared to leap off his head and bite a young woman during a campaign stop in De Moines.
Read full storyThe Madam's Revelations Tie Up Washington, DC
Commerce came to a halt yesterday in the U.S. capital when the DC Madam was allowed to release her list of phone contacts to the public.
Read full storyHippies Cause A Stink at 'Live Earth' Shows
WORLD NEWS - Concert goers at the 'Live Earth' shows left behind at least 1,025 tons of trash strewn about the grounds of the many venues holding the concerts. Clean-up continues at most locations, and some will be closed indefinitely.
Read full storySir Salman to 'fight them on the beaches'
Following today's twenty minute Speech from Osama Bin Laden's deputy Ayman al-Zawahiri, in which he directly threatened Tony Blair, Queen Elizabeth II and the British people over the knighthood of Salman Rushdie, an unlikely hero has come to...
Read full story"Suicide bummers" arrested
Two "suicide bummers" have been arrested after they attempted an illegal act on board a US-bound flight shortly after departure from London Heathrow airport.
Read full storyPresident Bans 'Toilet Targets'
WASHINGTON - President Bush signed another dictatorial 'Executive Directive' this morning banning the sale and possession of the trendy 'Toilet Targets' that have been popping-up in public bathrooms, sports bars, and homes across the...
Read full story"English" wine to be produced in France
After a disastrous growing season, the English wine industry has taken the decision to re-locate to Southern France, in a bid to ensure decent crops for the future.
Read full storyFlopped Fopp now Flip-Flop Shop
GLASGOW - Failed music store 'Fopp', who so candidly went into administration, closed down all their shops and left hundreds of workers unpaid - has now been demoted to making flip-flops (sandals for you Americans, or is it the other way roun...
Read full storyTour de Force - It's a knockout, on wheels!
Flushed with the recent success of London's hosting of the opening stages of the Tour De France, event organisers have concocted an ambitious plan for the Tour's likely return in 2012. Acutely aware that many jaded cockneys shunned the specta...
Read full storyArsène Wenger to move to Newcastle, forced to change name
Football manager Arsène Wenger has today signed for Newcastle in a deal said to be worth over £300m. The Magpies had been hoping to entice a top manager from either Arsenal or Manchester United in the hope of reviving their flagging fortunes, after c...
Read full storyFugitive child molestor appointed Solomons' Attorney General
Honiara - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): A fugitive child molesting lawyer wanted in Australia on an array of serious charges has been sworn in as the Solomon Islands' new Attorney General.
Read full storyJudge bans bare buttocks billboard erection at NY church
New York - (Ass Mess): Official: bare buttock billboards are now banned in New York after a judge upheld a minister's complaint that a bidet company cannot advertise its wares with such blanantly bare-assed cheek.
Read full storySenator Vitter apologises to GOP for 'failing to get away with it'
Washington DC - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): Louisiana Senator David Vitter has apologised to GOP grandees after being outed as a client of DC madam Deborah Jeane Palfrey.
Read full storyPoland's very own Pat Robertson in Nazi jibe row
Warszawa - (Ass Mess): As every leading fundamentalist dictatorship knows, you need a wingnut preacher to promote state fascism via radio, tv and internet.
Read full storyBad Loser Lewis Blames Wrong Car
Moaning Formula 1 rookie driver Lewis Hamilton blamed the WRONG SET-UP of his car after he FAILED TO WIN the British Grand Prix and settled for yet another disappointing podium finish even though it was HIS MISTAKE that cost him the...
Read full storyTories unveil new policy direction
The Conservatives will put tea and biscuits at the heart of their campaign to win the next general election.
Read full storySacked for blowing nose
A former employee of South England Trains is taking legal action against the company following his sacking for "gross misuse of company property".
Read full storyNY Times Might Mention Ron Paul; Internet Collapses
The New York Times announced today that it might mention Ron Paul in a story sometime before the end of 2007. Supporters of the candidate engaged in a blizzard of blogs, e-mails, and YouTube videos so intense that th...
Read full storyBarack Obama Supports Fruit Salad
Barack Obama offered his own take on Iraq today with his "Fruit Salad" plan. Obama said he felt the need to come forward after so many other ideas had come out in the past couple of days.
Read full storyHillary Clinton Calls for Iraq "Combo" Strategy
Hillary Clinton responded today to a series of proposals by others on Iraq with a strategy she described as "Combo." Her strategy would include some aspects of other strategies, along with other new ideas.
Read full storyLiverpool Cabbies Fight Council Over "Twenty's Plenty"
Local Government officials today clashed with taxi drivers over the imposition of a 20mph speed limit on an estate in Liverpool.
Read full storyTetchy Tevez Says "No" To United
Manchester United have failed to entice Argentine striker Carlos Tevez to Old Trafford due to "irreconcilable differences", it has been announced on the club's website.
Read full storyPrince Charles' Real Teeth Found
Prince Charles' real teeth were found today in Buckingham Palace. This was the first time the royal family admitted the prince has been wearing false teeth.
Read full storyThe Spoof writer causes Internet to crash
The famous Google Internet search engine crashed yesterday under pressure from millions of researchers searching for a picture of new bombshell British Home Secretary Jacqui Smith.
Read full storySmoking Ban: Government Hails Success: Bullshit, Say Landlords
The government today released statistics which reveal that the smoking ban is an overwhelming success, increasing business by over 500% in some parts of the country. Smokers all around the land are giving up in their thousands, and 320,000 lives have...
Read full storySir Elton John Loses nearly 90 Pounds! Head Practically Disappears!
Sir Elton John, who very recently headlined the Concert For Diana's Gerbil Fund, shocked fans with his sleek new slender look. What they might not have recognised is his head, which some estimate may have accounted for as much as 40% of the weigh...
Read full storyLooking for Ron Paul
After seeing Ron Paul mentioned often on the web, I decided to research the candidate by checking more reliable sources. First I watched the network news, starting with CBS, then NBC, and ABC too.
Read full storyTheSpoof.com Writer Settles with Labor Docs during Arbitration Process, Wins a Baby Girl!
US and A - The SpaceElevator family tree sprouted a new bud over the weekend, as the young couple accepted the Labor and Delivery doctors' offer of a new baby girl during intense 24-hour negotiations in which the participants were locked together...
Read full storyBig Brother Antipodean Pauline Makes Entrance
Big Brother 'contestant' Pauline made her entry into the House last night, with some of the current housemates frothing at the gills over her stunning good looks.
Read full storyNicole Richie Tries Pregnancy to Avoid Prosecution
In a desperate move Nicole Richie has opted for getting knocked up to try and tickle the sensibilities of the judge hearing her drunk driving/under the influence case, today.
Read full storyBush takes another step back to returning America to a parliamentary monarchy by defying Congressional subpoenas
Washington, D.C. - In the latest move to strengthen executive powers beyond their intended Constitutional limit, thus further weakening the Republic, Bush directed former White House aides to defy congressional subpoenas today, effectively reducing t...
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