Barack Obama Supports Fruit Salad

Funny story written by Warren Redlich

Tuesday, 10 July 2007

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Barack Obama's Iraq Solution

Barack Obama offered his own take on Iraq today with his "Fruit Salad" plan. Obama said he felt the need to come forward after so many other ideas had come out in the past couple of days.

The candidate stressed that Fruit Salad is completely different all the other recent proposals, including President Bush's Waffle, and the Giuliani-McCain-Romney Pancake. Asked about Hillary Clinton's Combo, Obama said he had not yet had an opportunity to review it and declined to comment. He did denounce John Kerry's French Toast proposal and offered to "personally kick Kerry in his French cuffs."

Obama's Fruit Salad proposal involves a gradual withdrawal of US troops from Iraq, with all troops home by Christmas. The troops would be replaced by sending fruit baskets to Iraqi leaders as well as to insurgent groups "to show our good faith." The selection of fruit would be based on research by the CIA and State Department diplomats, with assistance from Martha Stewart.

In related news, Rush Limbaugh apologized for suggesting that Obama should include watermelon in his fruit salad. Prominent black activist Al Sharpton had called Limbaugh a racist for the 973rd time, and the radio talk show host said that was "the straw that broke this white man's back."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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