The Madam's Revelations Tie Up Washington, DC

Written by Gail Farrelly

Tuesday, 10 July 2007

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Call Me Madam

Commerce came to a halt yesterday in the U.S. capital when the DC Madam was allowed to release her list of phone contacts to the public.

Roads had major traffic jams and the halls of Congress and government offices emptied as the accused rushed home to their spouses to provide answers and excuses for their behavior. Public relations strategists rejoiced, fielding numerous calls from clients, old and new, in need of their services to provide adequate preemptive strikes, should their phone numbers be "exposed." The most popular lines being heard around town were: It wasn't me, I didn't do it, I got a wrong number when I was trying to call my Aunt Sadie in Idaho, that was the day I lent the cellphone to my father-in-law, I do not know the woman, alcohol made me do it.

Rehab places all over the country are readying themselves for the onslaught of patients needing services for overcoming addictions to sex and alcohol as a result of the Madam's revelations.

Publishers confirm having received several book proposals from the Madam as well as those 'fingered' by her. So far the proposal titles generating the most buzz are: "If I Did It -- Here's How, Why, Where and With Whom" and "Text Message Me Madam."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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