Funny story: Pro-Cannabis MP Forgets To Attend Legalisation Debate

Pro-Cannabis MP Forgets To Attend Legalisation Debate

A Liberal Democrat MP was heavily criticised by party rank and file yesterday after failing to attend the first reading of his own private member's bill in which he calls for the legalisation of cannabis in certain exceptional cases. Called upon...

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Funny story: The Plots of Dominic Cummings

The Plots of Dominic Cummings

In a basement in Downing Street, Dominic Cummings sits at a desk swigging from a bottle of wine and smoking a cigarette. He is on the phone. "What's that? Shagger lost another vote? Fahkin' hell! "Sack the lot o' them! Shit, we need to get into...

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Funny story: King Boris Dismisses Parliament

King Boris Dismisses Parliament

New UK PM, Boris Johnson, has asked Parliament to dissolve, calling it "undemocratic and inconvenient". Instead he will rule as a new monarch, having also dissolved Queen Elizabeth II in a vat of acid. From now on, the PM will be known as King Bo...

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Funny story: Parliament Seizes Control of Michael Caine

Parliament Seizes Control of Michael Caine

In an unprecedented move, Parliament last night voted to take control of veteran British actor, Michael Caine, and has now occupied his swish home in Beverly Hills. Caine, 108, told newsmen last night: “I got up this morning and went downstairs to...

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Funny story: New Prime Minister Boris Johnson Pledges to Nationalise Wetherspoons

New Prime Minister Boris Johnson Pledges to Nationalise Wetherspoons

Bombast, bullshit and bollocks were the order of the day in Parliament today, as so-called Prime Minister Boris Johnson outlined his plans for the future of the not-so-United Kingdom. After a dressing-down from Her Majesty the Queen on Wednesday a...

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Funny story: Boris Johnson Suspends Parliament In 'Clamping' Exercise

Boris Johnson Suspends Parliament In 'Clamping' Exercise

With just over two months to go before the October 31 deadline, when Britain will walk away from the EU, most likely on a 'no-deal' basis, Prime Minister Boris Johnson has thrown a giant spanner into the works of government, by deciding to suspend pa...

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Funny story: Damian McBride signs for "Fake News" Website

Damian McBride signs for "Fake News" Website

Infamous former advisor to the British Prime Minister, Damian McBride has allegedly signed a high paid contract with an unnamed fake news website. The credentials of Mr McBride are undeniable given his recent phenomenal work in "spoofing" members...

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Funny story: Wee Jock Poo Pong McPlop In It

Wee Jock Poo Pong McPlop In It

The man who used to clean the toilets at Aberdeen station, Wee Jock Poo Pong Mcplop is in it up to his eyeballs. He is the joker responsible for the cost overruns involved in the building of the Scottish Parliament at Holyrood. Great shame too what w...

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Funny story: Alastair Campbell in Shock Return to Downing Street

Alastair Campbell in Shock Return to Downing Street

Prime Minister David Cameron emerged blinking from his Downing Street bunker today accompanied by a scowling chancellor George Osborne and a smirking Alastair Campbell, Tony Blair's former press secretary. He announced that Mr. Campbell would be res...

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Funny story: What is true coalition government?

What is true coalition government?

In current times, political parties and other pressure groups are more concerned with obtaining power, holding on to that power at all costs and protecting their own vested interests. They are less concerned with serving the very people who elected them and handed them that power. Add to this, the influence of big business and the flow of targeted donations into the coffers of the political par...

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Funny story: UK Politician's Suitable Anagrams - 2011

UK Politician's Suitable Anagrams - 2011

We present to you, anagrams of some of the crooks... I mean MP's of this wonderfully riot torn, nepotistic, and crumbling Nation. You will find some members of the Conservative Party (Anag: Vast carnivore type), New Labour Party (Anag: An we bar poultry), and the Liberal-Democrat Party (Anag: Cry bedlam Proletariat) David Cameron: Prime Minister (Tory-Coalition) 'Odd, I crave man' Nicola...

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Funny story: Meddlesome writes memoir: The Turd Man

Meddlesome writes memoir: The Turd Man

Once more a politician pours oil onto the burning facade of his own creation and cries out,'It wasn't my fault guv, it was his. Poor Gawd Blimey, he never realised the fundamental truth, your SCOTTISH man! Did you really think you could be P.M. fo...

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Funny story: Danny Dyer Appointed as Brexit Secretary

Danny Dyer Appointed as Brexit Secretary

"Prime Minister" Theresa May surprised both Brexiteer and Remainer members of her party today when she appointed EastEnders on-screen hard man Danny Dyer as Secretary of State for Exiting the European Union following the resignation of the previous s...

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Funny story: Plan to export human legs being considered

Plan to export human legs being considered

In a complex statement today, the foreign office has announced plans to look into exporting human legs, initially by way of cadavers but eventually by force from living, breathing human beings. The emerging Asian markets are demanding increasing...

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Funny story: Unexploded WWII Bomb Found Under Houses Of Parliament

Unexploded WWII Bomb Found Under Houses Of Parliament

Army bomb disposal units were called out to an address in Westminster last night, after an enormous unexploded World War II bomb was discovered at the Houses of Parliament. The bomb, estimated to be a 1,000ib device, is thought to have been fitted...

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Funny story: Government Fear Mongering Costs British Economy £30bn A Year

Government Fear Mongering Costs British Economy £30bn A Year

Government Fear Mongering costs the UK £30bn every year - more than twice as much as previously thought. Propaganda evasion has risen to £15.2bn a year with waking up to reality costing £1.1bn annually. In fact the public sector is the worst hi...

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Funny story: Guy Fawkes arrested in rat-infested catacombs of Parliament

Guy Fawkes arrested in rat-infested catacombs of Parliament

After failing to blow up parliament on November 5th, another attempt to cause anarchy in the Houses of Parliament has been thwarted today! Guy Fawkes was spotted entering a portcullis below water level in the Thames normally used to ship governmen...

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Funny story: Expenses Scandal Takes On A New Twist

Expenses Scandal Takes On A New Twist

Unnamed sources in Whitehall have revealed a loophole in parliamentary procedure covering conditions of service. Thanks to this flaw, MP's who are currently serving prison sentences for dishonestly claiming expenses can continue to claim expenses...

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Funny story: Sally Bercow's Love Life Too Public, Say Neighbours

Sally Bercow's Love Life Too Public, Say Neighbours

Revelations that John and Helen Bercow's love life has been boosted by living in their official apartment are no surprise to embarrassed neighbours. House of Commons' Speaker's wife Helen has astonished Parliament by taking part in a photo shoot,...

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Funny story: Burnley MP's pedal power message

Burnley MP's pedal power message

BURNLEY MP Gordon Birtwistle took advantage of a photo opportunity and used pedal power to support an energy saving campaign. He is backing "Earth Hour", when people across the world will switch off their lights on March 26 between 8.30pm and 9.3...

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