Written by Stiff Writer

Thursday, 17 February 2011

image for Big Cat to Clear Downing Street of Vermin
Hungry Tiger to "Clean up" Downing St

London, UK: After a number of complaints that Downing Street has become overrun with vermin, a big cat is to be brought in to remedy the situation.

"We first started to see them around May of last year, skulking around in the shadows, but now they march around like they own the place." Explains news reporter Sally MacLennane.

"Just last week we were broadcasting a live link in Downing Street when a particularly slimy rat could be seen in the background, emerging from number eleven. It seemed to grin smarmily at the camera before it sloped off. A number of our viewers caught sight of the dreadful thing and phoned in to complain of nausea. I must admit that I felt a little queasy myself."

Civil servant David Watts adds: "Its not just rats, there are mice as well. I used to think that mice were harmless and kind of cute, but my opinion changed when they formed a coalition with the rats. Now they seem to lost all respect for the British people and themselves, and just spend their days defecating over everything."

Handlers will be releasing a hungry Bengal Tiger into Downing Street on Friday afternoon, and recommend that the public avoid the area for their own safety.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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