Mechanic Claims To Have Seen The Face Of Christ On Apprentice’s Buttocks
A mechanic from East London claims to have seen the face of Christ on the buttocks of his 17-year-old apprentice, after a bizarre workplace incident left the youngster naked in front of him last week. Toby Dell, aged 32, from Shoreditch East Lond...
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Passive-Aggressive Priest Turns to Zionism
In a passive-aggressive move against Jesus, whom he'd codependently expected to somehow "save" him, the Reverend Father Kenneth O'Hara turned to Judaism and became a Zionist. O'Hara explained the thought process behind hs bold move against Jesus C...
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Angel Experiences Unprecedented Acceptance in Nashville
For her whole life, Lucinda Carlile, an angel, struggled to find people willing to trust and accept her - until she found her way to Music City, Tennessee, where she says she's experienced heretofore unimaginable levels of credibility. "We all cra...
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Trump Condemns Flaunting White Supremacy
In a national address following the latest racially motivated mass shooting by a man who claimed to be protecting his country from an ethnic invasion by Hispanics, United States President Donald Trump strongly condemned violently flaunting white supr...
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Naked Spears Mum as Rabbi Reverses Mormon Baptism of Dead Jews
WASHINGTON, DC -- Rabbi Jacob Baer stood before his congregation at Temple Sinai on Military Road yesterday morning, poised to perform a ritual that he had perfected just hours before. On a long table before him were a silver bowl, a small dark blue...
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Struggling Catholic Church Lays Off Holy Spirit
In the wake of continuing revelations regarding sexual abuse by priests and growing antipathy toward its pro-life/anti-choice stance on abortion, the struggling Catholic Church, unable to sustain a full staff, has laid off the Holy Spirit, long consi...
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The Madonna Miffed With Popeparazzi
Jesus H. Crikey to host new reality show!
Zombie Apocalypse is actually the Second Coming, Jesus reveals
Ronald Weinland - One of two of God's prophets - tells of Jesus returning
Christine O'Donnell To Lead Anti-masturbation Effort Under President Trump
Jesus Christ Shows Up for New Years
Jesus Christ has returned
New Revelations
Jesus Christ Returns to Earth; As Second Coming Actually Occurs, TV Evangelists Offer Insight
Donald Trump: "Jesus was born in Weirton, West Virginia!"
Yeezus One Step Closer To Becoming Jesus
Democracy Indicted for the Crucifixion
Did Jesus Wear Socks and Sandals, or Did He Paint His Toenails?
It's the ultimate fashion faux pas, of course, but did the Lamb of God wear socks with his sandals? Was that part of the reason that Pontius Pilate agreed to crucify our saviour? What do you think? It's possible, as Nazareth's average January temper...
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Jesus comes back to reteach America the Golden Rule. President Trump declares message "Fake News"
After getting sick of his Facebook feed being flooded with decisive rhetoric and partisan clickbait Jesus, the Son of God, decided to come back to earth early. He originally attempted to just post the Golden Rule on His Facebook page, but it ended u...
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Archaeologists Find Letter from Pontius Pilate
Archaeologists excavating along the North West coast of Palestine close to where Pontius Pilate had his palace have made a remarkable find. It is a letter written on papyrus. Experts are not sure if it is a copy or not. Was it ever sent? Did Tiberius Caesar read it and respond? If not, we could well be living now in a very different world indeed. Because what they unearthed is a letter from Po...
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Jesus Wants Cage Fighting Of MMA
Violence and religion have been one of the primary forces in human history. Now there is a fusion of the two with a new craze for 700 cage-fighting church ministeries across the U.S. "God loves cage fighting," says pastor John Richards of Colu...
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Schoolgirl's Snatch Thatch Bears Face of Christ
Chantelle Slutrunt, a seventeen year old Smegmadale schoolgirl studying for her A levels in Shoplifting and Knife Fighting at the town's Asbo Central Education Trust, has set the Christian and Judaic religious worlds afire after her younger brother W...
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An Achievment for the Ages: Elderly Woman Proud to Have Written ‘New York Times Bestselling Will’
Stating that she couldn’t have gotten this far without the love and support from her wonderful family, 93-year-old Esther Hammons reported, Tuesday, being “proud to be the authoress of a New York Times Bestselling Will”. “I’m a sim...
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Jesus Appears at St Patrick's Cathedral in NYC during the Celebration of the Eucharist, Gets Eaten
Jesus Christ shocked the congregation at New Your City's St. Patrick's Cathedral by showing up during the celebration of the Eucharist this past Sunday. Unfortunately for Jesus Christ, the congregation shocked Jesus Christ back, by eating him. "B...
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Jesus Comes Out of the Closet … Or Does He?
What a week it has been for the Son of the Almighty. Tuesday, Jesus himself was seen at the Tampa's infamous The Honey Pot night club, a night spot known for its super-hot drag show. A copy of Jesus's bar tab reveals he and his "posse" of Lucif...
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Nashville Man Who Decides to Follow Jesus Ends Up Sitting in One Place for Really Long Time
After much soul-searching, Michael Ford of Nashville, Tennessee, a Christian, decided to completely turn over his will and life and follow Jesus, only to wind up sitting in one place for a really long time.. As Mike tells it, the decision to follo...
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Jesus For President 2016 - Conservatives Have A Hemorrhage
Jesus Christ Himself announced His candidacy for the President of the United States in 2016. Rather than commencing with the long awaited Second Coming, the Big Three (Father, Son and Holy Ghost) changed game plans and decided that the political...
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21 proofs to the question "Who really was Jesus"?
Jesus was Black: 1. He called everyone Brother 2. He liked Gospel 3. He didn't get a fair trial Jesus was Jewish: 4. He lived at home till he was 33 5. He went into his father's business 6. He was sure his mother was a virgin and his mother was sure he was a God Jesus was Italian: 7. He talked with his hands 8. He had wine with his meals 9. He used a lot of olive oil Jes...
Read full storyFunny Jesus Headlines
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Pat Robertson calls on God to "Take Jesus Out !"
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Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Pamela Anderson Wed Christ After He KOs Boxing Champ
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Cup with earliest reference to Christ discovered
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Controversial Study Finds Jews Did Not Kill Jesus, Crucifixion Did
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The Gospel According To St Elton
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Jesus Christ was a fag and a communist
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Man Spills Soup and Finds Jesus
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God Speaks to Earth from Heaven
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The Case Against Jesus...Find of the Century
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Jesus Makes a Confession: " I messed up…"
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God proclaims George Bush "Jesus Christ Almighty"
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Mel Gibson Time Travel Goes Awry
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Jesus The Midnight Cowboy Papa's Got A Brand New Bag
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He Has Risen: Pillsbury Doughboy, The New Messiah
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Bush Administration Bible Blunder
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Da Vinci's Last Supper conspiracy theory: is woman holding a condom?
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Jesus Christ: The Final Interview... (Part 2)
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Christ the King of the Universe
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Jesus Tasered After Walking Into Church
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Drinking with Jesus
