Naked Spears Mum as Rabbi Reverses Mormon Baptism of Dead Jews
WASHINGTON, DC -- Rabbi Jacob Baer stood before his congregation at Temple Sinai on Military Road yesterday morning, poised to perform a ritual that he had perfected just hours before. On a long table before him were a silver bowl, a small dark blue...
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Did Jesus Wear Socks and Sandals, or Did He Paint His Toenails?
It's the ultimate fashion faux pas, of course, but did the Lamb of God wear socks with his sandals? Was that part of the reason that Pontius Pilate agreed to crucify our saviour? What do you think? It's possible, as Nazareth's average January temper...
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Carolina Football's Jehovah Defends Hiring Son Jesus As Offensive Line Coach
CHAPEL HILL, N.C. - The new chief of the University of North Carolina's football program is under fire from team boosters for choosing his own son as offensive line coach.
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Authorities Called to Governor Pence's Mansion
A host of authorities were called to 4750 North Meridian Avenue, Indianapolis, the governor's mansion, after a neighbor grew concerned over a raging fire, excessive smoke and an odd scent of burning flesh and hair. "The governor (Vice President to...
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The Madonna Miffed With Popeparazzi
"What am I, a saint?" moans Mary, mother of Jesus of Nazareth. "Why do these sketch artists and sculptors keep stalking me, trying to reproduce my image on canvas and stone? Their flashing torches are half-blinding me!"...
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Crown of Thorns Lost After Notre Dame Fire
It was a week of tragedy for France as the Notre Dame Cathedral burned before the eyes of the world. Luckily, the cathedral was not entirely destroyed. And most of the cathedral’s collection of artifacts have been preserved. Unfortu...
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Jesus Burial Site Authenticated
Jesus' Sandals Found in Iraq Desert
F-35 Shoots Down Santa; U.S. Military Culture May Change
HHH vs Jesus: Who is the real "king of kings"
Jesus Appears at St Patrick's Cathedral in NYC during the Celebration of the Eucharist, Gets Eaten
Touchdown Jesus protests World Cup
Angel Experiences Unprecedented Acceptance in Nashville
Woman Sells Image of Jesus on Toast Disguised as Bin Laden for Ten Million
British Swimmer Claims Silver After Near-Death Experience
Ron & Fred on The Bible
With Much Fanfare, the NRA Releases Its Version of the New Testament
Report Suggest That Not All Zombies Flesh Eating
Trump: Birther Attack on Jesus
Donald Trump seems strong in the race for the Republican presidential nomination, but that doesn't mean he'll curb his more fringe tendencies. This week, Trump spoke at Liberty University in Lynchburg, Virginia, where he brought his brash viewpoi...
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Mysterious last page of Bible found
Cairo - Among the winding alleyways of Cairo's medieval old town, nestled between the coffee shops and spice stalls, sits the small souvenier shop of Mr Ali Mahmoud.
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Struggling Catholic Church Lays Off Holy Spirit
In the wake of continuing revelations regarding sexual abuse by priests and growing antipathy toward its pro-life/anti-choice stance on abortion, the struggling Catholic Church, unable to sustain a full staff, has laid off the Holy Spirit, long consi...
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Jesus to Replace Seinfeld in Superman Ad Campaign
UP--In an announcement earlier today, American Express revealed that after creative differences with current spokesperson Jerry Seinfeld, the comedian would be replaced in the current Superman advertising campaign. The company then shocked everyone b...
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God proclaims George Bush "Jesus Christ Almighty"
In a bold political move, the president formerly known as George W. Bush today announced that he had legally changed his name to Jesus Christ Almighty.
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George Bush Claims He is Descended from Jesus Christ and Akhnaten and is Not "Human Trash"
WASHINGTON (AP)-President George Bush returned from the fourth Summit of the Americas held in Mar del Plata, Argentina on Monday with his tail between his legs, stung at being called "human trash" by Argentine soccer legend Diego Maradona, and called...
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Jesus Stands by His People, Makes Sure Black Lives Matter in Birmingham
Jesus found himself in the news again, this time in Birmingham, Alabama, the cradle of the Civil Rights movement. The Savior vowed to stand by His "people" until the "White Devils," as he called them, stopped physically harassing them as they did at...
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Catholic Offended at Being Compared to Alien-Believer
Defending his faith in Jesus Christ and the Catholic Church, Chad Hanley took offense when an acquaintance, in passing, compared him to a person believing in aliens from outer space. “I’ve never in my life worn a tin-foil hat,” said Hanley. “Nor w...
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The Increased Use Of The 'More Money Than God' Adage Prompts Jesus To Reveal His Net Worth
You've heard the slogan a million times - 'He's got more money than God'. And every time you listened to the saying, there was never any documented funds to refer upon to support the outlandish claim. Well, now there is, thanks to Jesus officiall...
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Trump Condemns Flaunting White Supremacy
In a national address following the latest racially motivated mass shooting by a man who claimed to be protecting his country from an ethnic invasion by Hispanics, United States President Donald Trump strongly condemned violently flaunting white supr...
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Religious Order of the Divine Will and Testament Collects Corpses' Social Security Checks until the Second Coming
Christian fundamentalist and pyramid scheme, Order of the Divine Will and Testament professes that its belief in the resurrection of the dead at the Imminent Second coming of Christ entitles them to continue collecting the social securities checks of...
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Jesus Not to Return
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Jesus Christ Choked On Easter Egg - Claim
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New Religious Movement In Jerusalem
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Jesus For President 2016 - Conservatives Have A Hemorrhage
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Story of Baby Jesus Rewritten to Fit in With Modern Consumerism
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Zombie Apocalypse is actually the Second Coming, Jesus reveals
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Jesus Cancels Second Coming Due To Lack Of Interest
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Cubs Win World Series; Christ Returns to Earth
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Review of Bethlehem Motel 24th December by Joseph
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Mary Magdalene Tell-all: "Jesus Was a Lousy Lay, But a Pretty Good Talker."
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Gibson Denies Jesus was Fetishist
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Chocolate Jesus Offends Lactose Intolerant Catholics
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He Has Risen: Pillsbury Doughboy, The New Messiah
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Jesus returns, arrested following sermon
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Spoof Super Heroes Chapter 5: Return of the Black Squirrel
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Is the Bible about to be made more factual?
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Pacifist priests have broom battle in Bethlehem!
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Jesus Hangs Up His Crown of Thorns, Looks Forward To Retirement
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Drinking with Jesus
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Jesus bans chrissy chocolate sales in August in UK supermarkets!
