Sharpton, Jackson, Christ Defend Imus

Funny story written by KEN RYNNE

Tuesday, 10 April 2007

image for Sharpton, Jackson, Christ Defend Imus
A Contrite Don Imus

(SEACAUCUS, NJ) --Syndicated MSNBC shock jock Dom Imus, recently suspended two weeks for a controversial on-air description of female African American student basketball players at Rutgers University as "nappy headed ho's," today received support from surprising sources. After apologizing to the student athletes and the community in a two-hour interview on Rev. Al Sharpton's radio show, admitting his remarkes were "stupid and insensitive," Imus sought forgiveness and pledged to do better.

In 30 years Imus's show has become a political salon as well as a comedy show poking fun by the powerful at the powerful in media, politics, and business - and everyone else - attracting powerful guests and regular callers alike.

Presidential candidate Al Sharpton urged that Mr Imus's 30-year career not be judged by just three words - "I am grateful that people have not judged my whole life's work by the 15-minutes of Tawana Brawley," referring to the cause celebe of racially motivated sexual assault charges championed by Rev. Sharpton later disclosed as a hoax. Rev. Sharpton later ran for the Democratic nomination for President and emerged as a leading political voice in the African American community.

Similarly, Rev. Jesse Jackson remarked that "This is Imus's Good Friday - but surely there will be an Easter Sunday," as he recalled his own resurrection after offensive remarks calling heavily-Jewish New York City as "Hymietown" during Jackson's bid for the Democratic nomination for President. Jackson's statement did not preclude him from his continued leadership in the civil rights movement.

Also, Jesus of Nazareth whose infamously violent outburst in the temple and upending the "money changers" led several to call for his dismissal. In an exclusive interview with, the Galilean stated humbly: "Judge not, lest you be judged," and cited a man he identified only as "Francis" from Assisi, Italy, as teaching: "It is better to forgive, than to be forgiven." Although he did not go on to run for the Democratic nomination for President, Jesus the Christ did go on to initiate a worldwide spiritual movement (that spawned several religious sects) that today bears his name (and sometimes follows his teachings).

Mr. Imus's two-week suspension from his comedy show begins April 17. Race in America has been a sensitive or insensitive issue more often ignored than discussed since 1619. Christianity has taught forgiveness and redemption since 30 A.D. "But Don, I mean really. You're forgiven but your 15 minutes is officially over. Someone else's turn now." God said.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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