A Hyena Carves A Turkey
Ah, look at that turkey! And the hyena with the carving knife. See the homicidal glare in her eye, wondering if her husband is coming downstairs to join the family or is he with his mistress right now, having a turkey not filled with poison and Q…
Read full storyWorld Cup of Politics
Hello and welcome to the 2millionth Annual Political Football Match for World Supremacy. And we have the Fascists versus Antifa. The North Korean and the American Republicans are going up against British Labour and the Taiwanese Environmentalis…
Read full storySex With A Turkey: “Don’t Do It, Joe,” Warns Elmer Smuckmeister
BILLINGSGATE POST: After watching President Biden getting a little too friendly with one of the turkeys he pardoned before Thanksgiving, Elmer Smuckmeister, no stranger to his own sheep, admonished Joe Biden: “Don’t do it, Joe. Those rascals will…
Read full storyNancy’s Retirement Podcast Show
What will Nancy Pelosi do now that she’s retired? Spend time with her kids and grandkids? Of course. Maybe do a little shopping, go on a cruise, travel to destinations far and wide without needing to answer any political questions from every ponce…
Read full storyAn Important Announcement Concerning POETRY
Hello, this is Nigel Frickenhoffenpeppergotliceinmejeans, the world authority on all things poetry. During the pandemic, which some feel is still not over but no one wants to breathe their own garlic breath through a fucking mask anymore, so bring…
Read full storyQuestions Without Answers for the NRA and their Spawn
Do they know it’s Christmas … wasn’t that a song once? Well, the NRA and other guns whackos want America to know that Black Friday is here and Christmas is coming! So what do millions of Americans get for mom, dad and the 2.5 kids (or a litter of…
Read full storyFox News Reports That Trump Is No Longer Relevant - He's Just An Ugly-As-Shit Has Been!
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - The Fox News Network has just put out a memo stating to all Fox employees that Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump is no longer relevant. The Corporation wants everyone to know that the "Pussy Grabber" has just simply bec…
Read full storyPete Davidson Reveals The Real Reason Why He Dumped His Girlfriend Kim Kardashian
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - Pete Davidson was asked by Tittle Tattle Tonight writer Pico de Gallo why he dumped the sexy, sultry Kim Kardashian. Davidson who is only 29, said that at first the thought that the idea of him being in love and hav…
Read full storyThings getting exciting in the Archers
Things are getting exciting in the Archers, with not one, but two choirs in the offing. One is aimed at the youth, and the other is aimed at the older bods, and you just know that come Christmas, there will be either blood-shed or a sing-along for…
Read full storyInfluencer wants to be the next Prime Minister
Spencer Louis, an influencer has told his social media followers (all 15 of them) that he wants to be the next Prime Minister. 'I think I would have a few good, workable ideas. I would invest the money well, take an interest in the lives of people…
Read full storyLondon's Infamous Streetwalkers Union Endorses Cheryl Cole For Prime Minister
LONDON - (Satire News) - London's Hussies Union #169 has just endorsed singer/actress Cheryl Cole to be the next prime minister of the United Kingdom. The whore union has 903 members, including one who was voted London's Best Fucking Whore of 2022…
Read full storyBook that no-one wanted a full price still not selling at half price in Black Friday sale
Walter the Fungus, an uplifting children's book written by a former children's television presenter which only sold 129 copies at £9.99 hasn't sold any copies at £4.99 in the Black Friday Sale. Walter is rejected by everyone, until he finds a coll…
Read full storyBuckingham Palace Has Termites
LONDON - (Satire News) - Buckingham Palace spokesperson Nigel Foote has just told the British news media that Buck House was recently checked out by an insect spraying firm, and it was found to have an infestation of the dreaded Tanganyikan Trifling…
Read full storyJason Aldean's Wife Named The Most Hateful Wife In Country Music
SHIT CREEK, Georgia - (Satire News) - Yippee-Ki-Yay Magazine has just named Brittany Kerr Aldean as "The Most Evil, Hateful Country Singer's Wife In Country Music." Brittany Kerr Aldean, who flopped on American Idol several seasons ago, is regarde…
Read full storyNew Winter Fashions Spotted at Walmart - Nude-Look Ski Togs
Those super clinging yoga tights - the trendy Street Clothing showing every woman Ass Crack - are now considered Old Fashioned. The Look is also on its way out for the 200- and 300-pound women who usually looked like gargantuan hippos in those ti…
Read full storyWhen can we watch the family film about the phsycopath?
Hello, Mr Ray Ving here again. It is getting to deep winter, and we have to ask a few questions. When can we watch the family film about the psychopath? You know the one, where the young child sets booby traps in his home so that Joe Pesci and…
Read full storyKim Kardashian Who Was Dumped By Pete Davidson Calls Kanye West - And K.W. Tells Her To Go Fuck Herself
HIDDEN HILLS, California - (Satire News) - Hollywood Hors D'oeuvres reporter Tahiti Zeppelin says that Kim Kardashian is still very heartbroken at being dumped by her boyfriend of 10 months Pete Davidson. Miss Zeppelin said that Kimmy even lowered…
Read full storyThe New Republican Party - the Trump 'Pit Bull' Republicans
I have been watching with alarm as democratic America slides downhill toward Republican Fascism - said British Journalist Basil Blathering. I have been blathering about it for years. Mussolini had his brown shirts - Trump has his orange hats.
Read full storyTrump Has Become Addicted To Preparation H
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida - (Satire News) - One of the Mar-a-Lago maids has told a reporter with the iNews News Agency that Mr. Trump has become addicted to Preparation H. The maid, identified as Ling Ling Ching told iNNA reporter Kitty Segovia that she…
Read full storySkyscapers Full of Pigs are Opening in China
There is a new high-tech way of raising pigs - and China is pioneering it. China now has a 26-story skyscraper that holds 300, 00 pigs - sort of pig condos in the sky. It has computer controlled light and heat - and the pigs are fed by robots.
Read full story97 year old reading 100 things to do before you die book
97-year-old William Wilberforce is reading a book given to him on his 93rd birthday, called 100 things to do before you die. William, a father of four, mother of none, and grandfather of 11 has decided to do something about it. 'Yes, I thought…
Read full storyMiley Cyrus Confesses That She Had G-Spot Enhancement Surgery
HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - Miley Cyrus has let the pussy (cat) out of the bag, as she has revealed that she recently had G-Spot Enhancement Surgery. Miley told Carolina Chipotle with Bedroom Pillow Talk that she has been wanting to get the proced…
Read full storyKhloe Kardashian Says That Her Big Sister Kim Is Devastated at Being Dumped By SNL's Pete Davidson
HIDDEN HILLS, California - (Satire News) - Khloe Kardashian says that her big sister (in age - not size) is extremely depressed after being dumped by her boyfriend (Pete Davidson) after being together for 10 months. Khloe said that since the break…
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