Pete Davidson Reveals The Real Reason Why He Dumped His Girlfriend Kim Kardashian

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 25 November 2022

image for Pete Davidson Reveals The Real Reason Why He Dumped His Girlfriend Kim Kardashian
Pete says he is definitely done boinking cougars.

NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - Pete Davidson was asked by Tittle Tattle Tonight writer Pico de Gallo why he dumped the sexy, sultry Kim Kardashian.

Davidson who is only 29, said that at first the thought that the idea of him being in love and having sexual relations with a 42-year-old cougar made him feel special.

But he added that after having sex with the lights on one night and seeing Kim's 42-year-old body with its cellulite, spider veins, stretch marks, and scars, he began having second thoughts.

He sat Kimmy down and told her that he had decided to put an end to his infatuation with cougars and to begin focusing on getting a girlfriend who is either his age or else younger than him.

Pete dated 30-year-old Miley Cyrus, but he noted that her labia majora had a good-sized blemish that sort of resembled the state of West Virginia, so he bid her a quick adieu.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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