Gods Are Made …To Be Crucified
I was crazy. Once. Still am. I think Donald Trump was prophesized in the Book of Revelation. But you didn’t hear that from me. I tell myselves: “Don’t start rumors about real people being magically turned into gods and resurrecting from the dea…
Read full storyTed’s Openly Gay for Being Anti-Gay
Ted Cruz thinks that when the Supreme Court voted to legalize same-sex marriage, they did bad! Is this ‘cuz the current Nazi SOTUS overturned Roe V Wade? Or is it because radical Republicans have become emboldened by the presidency of Trump tha…
Read full storyWhen A Haircut Is News
Justin Trudeau got a haircut, and he looks like Jim Carrey in ‘Dumb & Dumber’. How dare those who made this comparison speak ill of that wonderful movie! “Kick his ass, Seabass!” “You boys been suckin’ back on grandpa’s old cough medicin…
Read full storyHelp Ex-President Trump Fight Global Warming - Give To The 2024 Global Heatwave Fund
Pres. Trump has always fought Global Warming - and now needs your help to fight it in 2024 - a peak year for Global Heatwaves. Send all checks made out to Donald Trump at Mar a Lago, West Palm Beach Florida. (At bottom put in - 'For Global Warmi…
Read full storyThe Dallas Cowboys and The Los Angeles Rams Will Be Playing a Game In Ukraine
DNIPRO, Ukraine - (Sports Satire) - NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has just stated that the Dallas Cowboys and the Los Angeles Rams have agreed to play an exhibition game at Dnipro's Freedom Fighters Field. The game will benefit the Children of Uk…
Read full storyDonald "Rhino Ass" Trump's Approval Numbers Are Now In The Toilet
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - A magazine article on Trump's approval numbers, or more accurately unapproval numbers, shows that the Nazi Has Been's numbers are sitting in the toilet (and fittingly). According to a Mar-a-Lago maid, Trump cannot s…
Read full storyThe New York Yankees Are Tearing Up Major League Baseball Big Time!
NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - The New York Yankees, aka The Bronx Bombers are totally dominating the American League East, as well as all of baseball. They currently have the best record in all of MLB baseball with a won-loss record of 62-28.
Read full storyOzzy for PM!
Ozzy Osbourne has been thinking about his old country. Hollywood is a-buzz thinking that Ozzy may head back to the Merry Ole England to invade London and become the Prime Minister. His campaign world tour and slogan will be: “Hop On Ozzy’s Crazy T…
Read full storyPenny Mordaunt Takin’ It Off!
A source close to Penny Mordaunt has stated that if Penny doesn’t win the Conservative race and become the next shamed and Benny Hill-ed PM, she will start modeling. First bathing suits. Then lingerie. Then … ? (Tasteful nudes?) If you are a pr…
Read full storyLiz Truss is Trussin’ Up
Liz Truss wore the same clothes that Margaret Thatcher wore. Does Liz think she’s a dead Prime Minister? Does this count as mental illness? Should ANOTHER politician with mental problems lead Britain? To ‘truss’ is to bind closely or secure tightl…
Read full storyNorth Becomes South in a Heatwave
Martha and the Vandelles sang about a heatwave burning in their hearts. Now Europe and Texas and much of the rest of the world are burning up. And their hearts just aren’t in it. Do right-wingers who still think some kind of god is in charge of…
Read full storyAustralian Opposition Concerned Dutton’s Nickname Isn’t Wanky Enough
CANBERRA, AUSTRALIA: Leading members of Australia’s Liberal Party have expressed concern over party leader Peter Dutton’s prospects of becoming prime minister given his lack of a suitably wanky nickname for the media to use when referring to him. Dut…
Read full storySexy Tweets From The Mouth of Marjorie Taylor Greene
BALTIMORE - (Satire Tweets) - Marjorie Taylor Greene says that if her hooha could talk everyone, especially old, blue-haired GOP women, would be shocked as to what utterances would come out of her sexy, sweet beaver (muffin). MTG says that she lea…
Read full storyThe Pink Lives Matter Organization Demands That The Statue of Liberty Be Painted Pink
SAN FRANCISCO - (Satire News) - The Pink Lives Matter had their yearly convention in the city that is home to the 49ers, the Giants, and the Warriors. A spokesperson for the PLM organization said that the convention drew over 8,000 members from Ne…
Read full storyThe NRA's Goobergoob Family Reunion Goes Off Without Any Accidental Shootings
CRICKET BALLS, Mississippi - (Satire News) - The local newspaper is reporting that the 27th Annual Goobergoob Family Reunion, which is a 99% NRA family, was held at an old abandoned Dairy Queen parking lot for the seventh year in a row. Family pat…
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