Since Being Cut Out of Her Daddy's Will Ivanka Trump Has Become Very Depressed - And She Is Now On Suicide Watch
MANHATTAN - (Satire News) - Jared Kushner recently told one of his cousins that his wife, Ivanka has become more and more depressed. Kushner stated that the reason for her hard-core depression is due to the fact that the Trumptard got furious as h…
Read full storyEvery Secret Service Agent That Protected Him Said That He Reminded Them of An Orange-Looking Hitler
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - One Secret Service agent who was assigned to Trump has just come out with a new book on the Trumptard. The book is called, "I Protected Trump - But I Felt As If I Was Actually Protecting Hitler." The tell-all…
Read full storyQueen Elizabeth Explains Why She Is So Darn Depressed
LONDON - (Satire News) - Her majesty has finally revealed why lately she has been feeling extremely depressed. The 96-year-old monarch told Loretta Piffinshaw, with Ta Ta For Now News, that her depression is not due to her age, which yes, everyone…
Read full storyA Thief Breaks Into Marjorie Taylor Greene's Appartment and Steals All Of Her Panties
BALTIMORE - (Satire News) - Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene has a home in Washington D.C. and she has an apartment in Baltimore. Recently after arriving back in Baltimore from D.C. Marjorie noticed that someone has broken into her apartment. She c…
Read full storyCalifornia Is So Damn Hot That The Disneyland Statue of Mickey Mouse Has Melted
ANAHEIM, California - (Satire News) - Dozens and dozens of cities in California are setting summertime temperature records. Oakland reports that the San Francisco Bay is actually boiling. San Diego reports that horned toads are spitting on each ot…
Read full story80,000 Cubans Who Came to U.S. To Visit Relatives Are Staying
Last year 80, 000 plus Cubans came to America, because we have a total economic embargo Of Cuba. This is how we foster Democracy in Latin America and the Caribbean. We are famous for encouraging Democracy - right? Trump was a Cuba Commie Hater whi…
Read full storyPresident Biden Has Just Cancelled Donald Trump's Secret Service Protection
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - President Biden has decided that Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump is no longer entitled to have the American taxpayer pay for his Secret Service protection. POTUS has decided to invoke the Presidential Secret Servic…
Read full storyNASCAR Driver Toby Tarbinski Is Suspended For Two Weeks For Using Illegal Windshield Wiper Fluid
CHARLOTTE, North Carolina - (Sports Satire) - NASCAR regrets having to suspend one of their drivers for a violation regarding windshield wiper fluid, A rep for NASCAR stated to Sports Territory Magazine's Tango Brisket, that after an extensive inv…
Read full storyThe Once Neutral Country of Switizerland Sends a PT Boat To Aid The Ukraine In The Fight Against The Russian Invaders
BERN, Switizerland - (World Satire) - President Ignazio Cassis, has just told his fellow countrymen that in the interest of wiping out tyranny in the world, he will be sending Switzerland's lone patrol torpedo boat to the Ukraine to help in the Ukrai…
Read full storyThousands of Undocumented Individuals Either Climb Over or Dig Under Trump's Totally Useless Wall Every Day
EL PASO, Texas - (Satire News) - The Daily Max News Agency has just revealed that a recent QuinniPinni Poll has shown that every single day thousands and thousands of undocumented individuals from Guatemala, Costa Rica, Mexico, the Ukraine, and the D…
Read full storyTrump Tells Melania He'll Give Her $2 Million To Drop The Divorce Proceedings
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida - (Satire News) - There are literally hundreds and hundreds of people who have made Trump see red. Individuals from Nancy Pelosi to Robert DeNiro, and Celion Dion to Rosie O'Donnell, but no one has ever made him madder that his…
Read full storyBillionaire Rupert Murdoch Divorces Jerry Hall And Quickly Marries a Gorgeously Sexy 24-Year-Old Woman
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - Rupert Murdoch has always said that he loves the idea of being married to hot, sexy, blonde woman. And so after divorcing Texas-born model Jerry Hall, who was once married to Rolling Stones singer, Mick Jagger, the…
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