America's Homeless Problem: The Final Solution
America's Homeless Problem: The Final Solution. By General Wolfgang Puck America Heritage Foundation. "We Offer Final Solutions To America's Problems." Every day there are over 3.5 million people in the United States that are homeless. Of course, many of them are hungry. As part of what is increasingly called the "war on the homeless" local governments and businesses are united in tryi...
Read full storyMerkel listened to US too!
Bonn, Bonn, somewhere in France: German chancellor, Angel Merkel, has admitted to listening to US because she just cannot stand the sound of her own voice. After having playbacks played back to her by her favourite minister, Herr Arschloch van Win...
Read full storyHeads of North Korea and Scientology Will Conduct Summit of Evil With Special Musical Guest Kanye West
Clearwater, FL - Kim Jong Un, despot of North Korea, and David Miscavige, dictator of Scientology, and Kanye West will meet on the Winter Solstice, December 21, to discuss how to increase the evil quotient in the world today. They have invited s...
Read full storyBlowing Hot & Cold
There's something Blowin in the Wind. Coming from the backside of that srilanking violet David Cameroon: It's a Blow for Freedom - Hot & Cold Chop Suey Maoist Style! 'I'm not just Blowin my nose, blowing my own trumpet. S'not the way I operate...
Read full storyIllusionist/Contortionist Disappears Up His Own Butt, Never To Be Seen From Again
BRILLIANT, Ohio - In front of a hometown live television audience, Illusionist/Contortionist, Mr. Winston Brevity, in a stellar reality performance, managed to contort himself into a pretzel and then disappear up his own butt. As advertised in th...
Read full storyMiley Cyrus: Dad Told Me The Facts of Life
Miley Cyrus has told a friend, who told us just as she planned, that Miley learned some about boys from her mom but it was her dad, who told her the rest. "Miley, Baby", you're growing up and one day you'll meet a guy and want to get married...or...
Read full storyPope-A-Dope Part 3: At Which Point You Know Who (Just For The Heaven And You Know Where Of It) Does What He Can To Further Prove That 1+2<3
VATICAN CITY - And so, to sum things up. "Wait! No…..huh?" Oh yeah. In other words, more or less, recklessly composed for just such an occasion, here's an otherwise additional supply from Pope Francis, as unleashed recently via his first offi...
Read full storyAndre Villas-Boas not paranoid
Tottenham Hotspurs manager Andre Villas-Boas yesterday announced that he was not paranoid. "After all, paranoia doesn't mean the whole world really isn't out to get you", he said. There is a sinister agenda to undermine me. Anyway where is this P...
Read full story10 most frightening sounds on Earth
The Phone votes are counted and the lines are now closed. The most blood curdling sounds known to man are as voted: 1) A Spanish woman accusing her husband of having an affair. 2) A bull elephant charging. 3) A tsunami alarm. 4) An earthquake. 6) A fast train approachin a stalled car. 7) Your wife coming back early from a hairdressing appointment. 8) An escaped lion roaring in your porc...
Read full storyM.O.D. shocks Chiefs of Staff by replacement of Warship guns with word processors
The Minister for Defence, Richard Hammond has sent out requests for contract tenders to supply state of the art deadly word processors capable of on the fly rapid deployment of emails. These new machines will take the place of torpedoes, guns and mis...
Read full storyBritain's PM Cameron Brokers New China Deal - Delivery charges dropped on orders within 20 mile radius
Prime Minister David Cameron has accidentally negotiated a super deal with China on free delivery of takeaway special meals for two within 20 miles. China has agreed to use its influence on British Chinese food takeaway outlets in a major concession...
Read full storyMiley Cyrus Case Study: Scientists Discover New Form of Tourette's Syndrome "Tongue Twerkettes"
Doctors nationwide in the last few months have received a flood of calls, walk ins, and email correspondence from parents expressing concern over their childrens behavior. The main cause for alarm is that these children are constantly sticking their...
Read full storyBack in all its glory!
The Spoof has returned and let us all hope that it will remain a place for fun, enjoyment, laughter, creativity and comradeship! This is world news, so let all spoof writers join together and celebrate with a bottle of pop! Party time once agai...
Read full storyTaco Bell Teaming With "Hello Kitty" in 2014
Taco Bell, anticipating a need to stay ahead of the game, has teamed up with "Hello Kitty" manufacturer to develop a HELLO KITTY HAPPY TIME PINK TACO/GRANDE MEAT BURRITO COMBO Taco Bell has been on a kick for awhile now adding new, unique taco fla...
Read full storyAnimal Rights Advocates Outraged Over Beaver Grooming Prank
Oregon - Animal rights advocates in the state of Oregon are outraged after a recent discovery in the Wilderness areas of their state. Ostensibly a group of hikers, during an expedition spotted an entire colony of SHAVED BEAVERS! "It's sickening.
Read full storyThe Rolling Stones Are Negotiating With Kanye West
NEW YORK CITY - A representative for the Rolling Stones recently met with Kanye West's business manager at New York's famed Trump Tower. The two met to discuss the British band acquiring the rights to Kanye's album titled Kanye West's Tribute To T...
Read full storyGermany Will Be Sending The Cannibal Cop To Lower Zamgola, Africa
DRESDEN, Germany - Local authorities in the German town of Dresden are reporting that there is so much hatred and animosity towards 55-Year-Old German cannibal police officer Detley G. that they are having to take him out of the city. An official...
Read full storyGary Busey Banned From Visiting The NASA Space Center
HOUSTON - Trent Timmelfarb, the official spokesperson for NASA's Lyndon B. Johnson Space Center, recently met with representatives of the news media. He discussed the topic of the land rover Curiosity, which is on the planet Mars gathering up an u...
Read full storyTed Nugent Says He Wants Sarah Palin To Run For President In 2016
DETROIT - NRA advocate and rock musician Ted Nugent has just stated that he wants Sarah Palin to run for President in 2016. Nugent said that he likes Palin and has mentioned on dozens of occasions that he thinks she has the nicest looking legs of...
Read full storyThe New England Patriots Defeat The Houston Texans But Only By 3 Points And Not By 32 Like Tom Brady Had Predicted
HOUSTON - The New England Patriots came from behind to beat the Houston Texans 34-31. And although it goes down as a "W" for the Pats, quarterback Tom Brady showed that he better stick to football and leave the point spread to the experts in Las V...
Read full storyKim Jong Un Sends A Very Strongly Worded Message To China
PYONGYANG, North Korea - Chung Duck Ho, a spokesperson for North Korea, has just stated that President Kim Jong Un has issued a very important message directed at the republic of China. The North Korean leader has said that he is ordering his mili...
Read full storyParis Hilton Loses $200,000 In A Bad Business Deal
BEVERLY HILLS - Paris Hilton, the Tinsel Town celebutante who is famous for doing nothing has just stated that she has lost $200,000 in a business deal that she was told was the greatest thing since sliced bread. Hilton speaking with Savannah Kett...
Read full storyHell's Kitchen Chef Gordon Ramsay Talks About His Brand New Unique Cooking Show
LOS ANGELES - British citizen Gordon Ramsay has proved to be a very successful businessman since coming to America from the other side of the pond. He has produced and starred in several cooking based shows and he will soon be appearing in a new o...
Read full storyNASA Reports That The Martian Land Rover Has Run Over A Possum
HOUSTON - NASA officials have just received a computer readout from the Martian land rover Curiosity which reports that it has run over what appeared to be a possum. One of the NASA executives who saw the computer message noted that a varmint type...
Read full storyComing Soon: The iCondom
NEW YORK CITY - National Focus Magazine is reporting that The Milky Way Prophylactic Company, which is based in Long Island, New York, has announced it newest product. Company spokesperson Richard "Dick" Tarsonberry spoke with NFM's Durango Tucker...
Read full storyLindsay Lohan Says She Has Said Sayonara To Her Party Girl Days
LOS ANGELES - The former number one party girl of LaLaLand, Lindsay Lohan has stated that she has mended her evil, wicked ways and her lips no longer touch alcohol. Lohan who spent three months in rehab told Tequila Tallyho with Left Coast Mirror...
Read full storyJustin Bieber's Career Is Heading South Fast
LOS ANGELES - It appears that with each new day, Justin Bieber learns that he has once again shot himself in the foot. Comedian Zydeco Dupree stated that the Biebs is going to run out of space on his feet if he keeps this rate up. Barbara Walte...
Read full storyThe Denver International Airport Baggage Thief Is Being Sent Down To Juarez, Mexico
DENVER - The officials at Denver International Airport are still very upset at John "Johnny" Papelbon, 52, who was caught stealing passenger's luggage from the airport baggage carousels. Two of the bags that Papelbon stole belonged to musician Pet...
Read full storyRush Limbaugh Announces What He's Getting Everyone On His Christmas List
NEW YORK CITY - Rush Limbaugh may look like Jolly Old Saint Nick but don't let the big old beer gut fool ya, deep down inside he is more like Ebenezer Scrooge. At least that is what his wife recently told Ellen DeGeneres on her talk show when she...
Read full storyHamlet Reframed
"2b or 1b? That is the question." - A drunk Hamlet, forgetting which apartment the after hour party is at. "To Agree or not to agree? That is the question." - Always a question Hamlet ponders during heated political debates. "To Bee or not to bee? That is the question." - A young hamlet, contemplating whether or not he will participate in a spelling contest. "To Bee or not to bee? That is...
Read full storyUS Congress Unanimously Passes 'Days of the Week' Bill
In unparalleled precedence, the US Congress passed the dubious 'Days of the Week' bill by a unanimous vote, the first such occurrence in the short history of the 113th Do-Nothing Congress. So thrilled were all 535 members at the outcome, that they h...
Read full storyN. Korea Kim Jong Un Nutty As Fruitcake
North Korean leader Kim Jong Un had an American tourist, Merrill Newman, captured and accused the 75-year-old man of being a spy. Then he placed Newman on TV to read what was written for him confessing to not only being a spy but eating children.
Read full storySecret Solved in Obamacare Breakdown. VP Knockout!
Someone in Washington has finally figured out exactly why the Obamacare telephone crashed for so many days. No one will say but look for the President to present this person with a great paying job in Washington or cozy overseas assignment during...
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