BRILLIANT, Ohio - In front of a hometown live television audience, Illusionist/Contortionist, Mr. Winston Brevity, in a stellar reality performance, managed to contort himself into a pretzel and then disappear up his own butt.
As advertised in the weeks leading up to this feat, it was guaranteed to be a crowd-pleaser, not so much because of its uniqueness, but because Mr. Brevity was the local tax auditor for Internal Revenue as well as a used car dealer, and he was getting on people's nerves.
His agent, Mr. Roe-Bust, conceded that he too was a bit alarmed at the success, for he had been told by Mr. Brevity that it was merely an illusion, and had been persuaded to hand over the day's receipts, including his commission, to Mr. Brevity, which Mr. Brevity then pocketed inside the pants he would wear during the trick.
Mr. Roe-Bust stated that having foreshadowed such an outcome, prior to the event, he had decided to protect his interests by procuring some heavy duty laxatives which he had added to Mr. Brevity's last meal.
It is therefore hoped by Mr. Roe-Bust that Mr. Brevity may indeed fart himself back into existence at which time the agent will be able to finally claim the commission that is owed him and indeed the networks are currently negotiating over the rights to this event which may be more lucrative and spectacular than the recent Exploding Sperm Whale telecast on ustream.
