'Stallion Of The South' - At Last, Art With Balls
It will stand proudly in the Kent countryside, near the New Town Of Ebbsfleet Valley. It will be 164 feet tall, and probably made of concrete and fibreglass. It is the South's answer to 'The Angel Of The North' - a huge statue of a horse which will b...
Read full storyMan gives up hope of not having to clean shit up
Adam Booth finally succumbed to the realisation that he is never going to be called to isle 32 because there is an old friend to see him or to the fish counter just because they like his face. No, it will be as it always is, to clean up someone else'...
Read full storyVAT to be removed completely
Gordon Brown has today announced that VAT is to go from 15% to zero from the beginning of the the new tax year in April. In a bid to kick-start the economy the cut, which comes after a smaller one of 2.5%, is hoped to ensure that a recession is qu...
Read full storySven admits the shags are better in Mexico
Sven Go On Love-somehedson, the former Lazio coach the former England manager the former Man City manager, has admitted to the real reason he wants to continue managing Mexico, despite being linked to Portsmouth. Draped across silken bed sheets an...
Read full storyJolie To Star in "The Octuplet's Mom" Movie
LOS ANGELES, California - Angelina Jolie has been signed to star in the new movie "The Octuplet's Mom." Jolie will portray the California Super Mom who recently gave birth to octuplets in Kaiser Permanente Hospital in Bellflower, California. T...
Read full storyTwilight: The Epidemic
Results have been gathered from the 2008 survey. They reveal that 99.99% of all adolescent girls' lives have been changed by the Twilight Saga, written by Stephenie Meyer. It has been proved that many teenagers care more about their twilight books th...
Read full storyCruise's step ladder uproar
Tom Cruise caused quite and uproar when he unexpectedly chucked a bottle of conditioner at a shop assistant when she failed to give him a step ladder. The shop assistant was questioned and revealed: "I was asked by Cruise if he could use a step l...
Read full story"When the Fires Stopped"
When the Fires Stopped" the first post apocalyptic serial drama When the fires stopped, the screaming began. At first I was disoriented, my head hurt, but it was still there thanks to the Asteroid Armor. I purchased it from leper wandering the streets pre impact. "Pre-impact" - now I knew nothing would be the same. Back to the screaming. It was loud, but thankfully distant. I f...
Read full storyObama Delivers Fiery Speach, Waking Up Congress
Moving with remarkable speed, key lawmakers and the White House reached for final agreement Wednesday on a $789 billion economic stimulus measure designed to create millions and millions of jobs in a nation reeling from recession. "Time's a-wast...
Read full storyIf Britney Can Go Without Underwear, So Can I?
Peter Showman (Not his real name), 51, was "adamant," according to England's Kettering Evening Telegraph, that he had the right to wear whatever outfits he wanted, even though his favorite hangout was in front of Woodville Primary school in the morni...
Read full storyMona Lisa Stops Smiling
Paris-- The famous grin is gone. The Mona Lisa finally stopped smiling after over 500 years. Art lovers left the Lube Museum in tears this morning after the discovery. The museum was briefly closed 'for security reasons' but opened later, minus th...
Read full storyNew Negative Interest Rate Shock
The Bank of England has again cut interest rates to a new record figure. At minus 1.5%, it means that money will, for the first time in banking history, be deducted from savings and investment accounts. Although savers will be adversely affected, t...
Read full storyMichelle Obama makes Rogue magazine
Washington AC/DC - (Story of O Ass Mess): US President's wife Michelle Obama has made the front cover of the iconic Rogue magazine, formerly known as BigOilShagger! She is the latest First Lady to pose stark naked for the publication and follows...
Read full storyGerman man builds his own wall
A unemployed German man from Upper Saxony has declared he has had enough of the united federal government in Berlin and wants to build his own wall. Mr Gunther Stockhausen, a resident under the former German Democratic Republic (East Germany), is...
Read full storyMasturbation Linked To Global Warming
(New Yawk, NY)-- New scientific data indicates most global warming can be blamed on the common practice of masturbation. The disgusting habit is responsible for raising world-wide temperatures by at least 5 degrees. Only male masturbation was studi...
Read full storyGod Quits! Who next for the Hot Seat?
In a sensational move yesterday, God, omnipotent creator of all things bright and beautiful etc. etc. threw in the towel and resigned with immediate effect. "I've had it up to here", said a clearly upset God. "I thought I'd have had a lot more fun...
Read full storyPotential Ecstasy Reclassification "Worrying"
Government officials have spoken out about their worry of the possible effects of reclassifying ecstacy to a Class B controlled substance. As a result The Home Office has stated that, despite the recommendations of the government's top drug advisors...
Read full storyGiant White Whores to Greet Cross-Channel Travellers
Residents of Kent were up in arms last night as the latest news on the proposed "Gateway to the South" installation art project became clear. In an attempt to compete with the rusty half-man-half-glider statue (situated just off the A1, somewhere...
Read full storyPirates strike
Shipping companies across the world are rocking at the news that Somali Pirates are to hold a series of one day strikes over pay and conditions. The Somalian Pirates are appalled at the conditions that they find on-board the ships that they steal,...
Read full storyThe ATNIC Pandemic
At first, there was no money. Then gold, silver, and precious metals were made into coins, for convenience. Then somebody came up with a "get-rich-quick" scheme, and invented paper money, because precious metals (henceforth called gold) were too heavy and inconvenient. Of course, there was no limit to the supply of paper money, other than the speed at which trees could be turned into paper. So...
Read full storyChurch of England to ordain Rabbis
In their continuing efforts to appear non-discriminatory and anti-racist, the Synod of the Church of England has decided to allow the ordination of Rabbis for the first time. Continuing on from the banning of churchmen who might be members of the...
Read full storySquirrel - The Healthy Option
I have just had a brilliant idea. A brainwave, if you will. You see, I was reading this piece about the outcry over plans to slaughter Grey Squirrels - how they are to be bludgeoned to dGeath in order to save the poor, endangered little Red Squirrel from extinction (or worse, only being able to live in Scotland), and it got me thinking. Don't get me wrong, I've never really been a big fan of...
Read full storyBoth Israeli parties claim victory
The leaders of Israel's two main parties have claimed victory in the country's general election. With most of the votes counted, both the ruling Nazima party and the right-wing Fascistkud opposition party say they have won, though there was some conf...
Read full story'Tevez never a Soccervestite' - Izzard speaks out about United star
'He can never be one of us'. Harsh words indeed. But when delivered by comedian and self-celebrated transvestite Eddie Izzard, then you better listen. Who was he referring too? None other than Manchester United's all-action Argentinian striker Carlos...
Read full storyHunting Ban to be Lifted
The Government has announced a lifting of the ban on hunting with hounds, just five years after it's much-vaunted Hunting Act was introduced. In an Early Day Motion tabled today by Chancellor Alistair Slugbalancer, the Government is to reintroduce...
Read full storyThe frenzy over aspartame at FDA is ended
WASHINGTON DC - Food expert, and FDA spokesperson, Dr. Strangedeath issued the following press release in response to speculation that the FDA would soon take on a less menacing stance. This press release was issued at noon, February 9, 2009, and is reproduced here in part, starting with the section on aspartame. Methanol - Aspartame is the most searched for item on food packages around th...
Read full storyIf "Dear Abby" were "Dear Karl"
Dear Karl, I hope you can help me here. The other day, I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't driven more than a mile down the road when the engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband's help. When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes! He was in our bedroom with the neighbors' daughter. I'm 32, my hus...
Read full storyLove Filled Chocolates On Sale Wordwide
In order to reduce the shock of being dropped from Cupid's arrows late last month, the World WitchCraft Federation (WWCF) has partnered with leading chocolatiers all over the world to release a wonderful new concoction known as a "Love Filled Chocol...
Read full storyChurch of England Bans Carol Thatcher, Most of Royal Family Along with the BNP, almost
When the Association of Chiefs and Police, an odd combination of British Bobbies and Native American tribal Leaders decided to ostracize the British National Perverts for twisting and distorting England's noble tradition of racial tolerance, the Chur...
Read full storyDevils on the march Part V
o Because daddy at my age had strong conviction that he should not serve in the army of the faithless. Therefore, he became a draft dodger. Then, when time came, he took to the streets and shouted, "Down with the faithless." Later, he joined the forces that brought the faithless regime down. Upon victory, he hanged his former boss from the tallest tree in company yard, and sat at his desk, as the...
Read full storyBush Blamed for Aussie Bush Fires
Hardly anyone denies that former (Thank God!) President W is to blame for dozens of catastrophes from the world economy to hundreds of thousands of corpses that used to be live mothers and fathers and children. But few suspected that the mass murderi...
Read full storyTzipi and Pinhead Tied in Israeli Election
Tzipi Livini, a rising star in the davidic constellation of the state of Israel looked like the early favorite among Yahweh's chosen people. But in the latter days leading up to the people's choice a certain Pinhead from the tribe of Benhamin, a yaho...
Read full storyObama Promises to Rescue Failing Sperm Banks
As world banks collapse like New Orlean levys under the stress of Katrina and the neglect of Bush, many economic experts have overlooked the desperate plight of the nation's sperm banks. Billions of dollars have been poured out to rescued the mon...
Read full storyNew Line of Fashion Dolls: Golliwog, Sootie and Paki
In these dark days of economic collapse and calamity, crisis and near catastrophe, there will be a fresh and funky new line of brown fashion dolls to stem the problem. Inspired by the noble English nobility's recent outburst of love for their and...
Read full storySteingrabber Twins Offer to Pay A-Roid in Testosterone
Since acquiring baseball's greatest prospect and believing that that would insure the return of the greatest sports franchise in history to its championship ways, the Steingrabber family has been disappointed. Baron George after all had a stroke ove...
Read full storyAddicted to TheSpoof.com?
'You might as well accept it.' as wrinkly rocker Robert Palmer used to suggest, "You're addicted to…" TheSpoof.com. Well… he used to suggest it to our parents anyway - eh kids? But being addicted to TheSpoof.com is no laughing matter. In the last few years the incidence of TheSpoof.com addiction has gone through the roofies. And what about the peripheral damage with such a disease? How many...
Read full storyPeople Googling "Miley Cyrus nude" in vain
According to Google, Inc., despite the ongoing world financial crisis, rising unemployment, the housing market crash, and other more personal troubles, people throughout the world are googling for nude pictures of pop sensation and Hannah Montana sta...
Read full storyCorruption rukus at TheSpoof.com Online
Editors at TheSpoof.com, the top online comedy magazine, were today embroiled in a corruption scandal when it was revealed that the top writers all mark their own writing up. One writer, who refused to be named, said that he regularly gives his own s...
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