Cant Manage This
Ex-England striker, Manchester United forward and convicted drunk driver, Wayne Rooney, has sensationally revealed that he has had “managerial offers” even before he hangs up his boots. The revelations were discovered by Back and to the Left news two...
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England win World cup!
After 48 years of misery, upsets, lousy performances and overpaid Rooney, England have just finished first in the World Cup! The news has just seeped through after a donkey ridden by a Himalayan Sherpa, his five children and wife rode into Kathman...
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Thousands gather in Chicago to watch live twitter news feed of USA vs Belgium World Cup game
They travelled from all over the state to gather in Chicago town square. Draped in red, white and blue flags, these US team football fans stared up to watch the big screen in the centre of the square. On the giant TV was a live twitter news feed pa...
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Vuvuzela Found Stuck Up Man's Arse
Medical staff have told how a man was admitted to a Johannesburg hospital this morning with a vuvuzela protruding out of his arse. The local man, who had been blowing his 'horn' at the South Africa v. Uruguay game, had, apparently, been attacked b...
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Deutschland prove that England weren't so bad after all!
The Germans have done England a massive favour by powering Maradona's "Argie Bargies" out of the World Cup. In fact England can be quite proud of themselves, they scored twice against the Krauts, Messi & Co didn't even bother the German goalke...
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Man Stubs Toe As He Tries To Get A Better View
A man in the Cambodian second-city of Battambang was in agony on Saturday evening after he stubbed his toe. The incident happened around 10:13pm as Moys Kenwood watched the World Cup match between France and Argentina. Excited after the second Fre...
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Tevez Missing World Cup: His Choice!
ITV HD Viewers still think the USA won
National Crisis - England Fever
Barçelona's Lionel Messi Leaves Fan In Tears
'FIFA inserted 45-minute claim into dodgy dossier' - Campbell
Brazilian Masterchef Garners Low Ratings
The Secret England Footballer's Countdown to Brazil 2014: Part 6, Holiday in Miami
The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Call Up
Lionel Messi Spotted Souvenir-hunting
Paris Hilton Follows Brazilian Team to Rio after Loss, Told to Go Home
Concern As Football Supporter Defections Reach New High
Mrs Thatcher 'Rooting For Germans'
England: Fourth Place Is Coming Home!
Let the celebrations begin! The England football team, so often derided in the past and labelled 'disappointing' at major tournaments, have at last 'completed the job', 'delivered the goods', and, in one last pathetic strain for a brilliant flower...
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The World's Noise Experts Claim That The Sound of The World Cup Vuvuzela Is Worse Than Water Boarding
TOKYO - Dr. Choofi Hirocheeto, one of the world's foremost experts on noise, has commented in several publications including the highly prestigious Hey What The Hell Was That Noise Illustrated Monthly, that the sound of the African trumpets known as...
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World Cup 2010 News: Loin Cloth Ban Enforced
With only days left before the start of the 2010 World Cup in South Africa, a storm has broken over the tricky issue of 'traditional kits'. Some African teams have decided to exercise their right as Human Beings to choose to wear their traditional...
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World Cup 'Mystake'
I reported Mystic Meg's prediction that the World Cup final between Spain and the Netherlands would end in disaster. So many red cards were predicted, the game would be abandoned for lack of players. The fact that referee Howard Webb, is colour bl...
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Zimbabwe's World Cup Team
Here is the Zimbabwe World Cup team for its qualifying matches:...
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USA Fury As Prince Harry of England Scores In Extra Time
American soccer fans are furious after being knocked out of the World Cup thanks to a goal from third in line to the British throne, Prince Harry. Despite the scoreboard showing the goal, scored in the seventh minute of extra time, being credited...
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Britain defeated by Compare the Meerkat in World Cup bid
Aleksandr Orlov. The funny little meerkat every British household wants a doll of, just to have him given to your dog as a Christmas present. Now the proud mascot of Moscow as he was the first to celebrate the Russian success. In a fixed vote,...
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Arsenal Faces TV and Radio Blackout as Commentators Threaten Boycott
"We've had enough of this bollocks" so said national treasure and football hero, John "Motty" Motson in his capacity as the newly anointed chair of campaign group Football UK Commentators (FUKC). Motty came out fighting today as Arsenal FC announced...
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1966 World Cup Final Footage Was Doctored By BBC Technicians - England Have Never Won The World Cup!
Following the BBC Frozen Planet polar bear scenes - which were actually filmed in a zoo - controversy, a probably even more profoundly shocking revelation is about to rock the nation to its very foundations. Former BBC special effects wizard, Keit...
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No Comment Offered On England World Cup Squad Internal Warfare
Following the publication of certain 'rumours' alleging that the England World Cup squad was a party divided by loyalties relating to one side or another of the allegedly warring factions, centred around two prominent squad members, Skoob News set ou...
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Shakira's World Cup Song "Waka Waka" Has Just Surpassed Justin Biebers #1 Hit "Scratch My Little Nads"
JOHANNESBURG, South Africa - A spokesperson for Global Records has just stated that the official World Cup Games song "Waka Waka" has just made it to number one. Shakira sings the song which was co-written by American Idol's Kara DioGuardi and 50s...
Read full storyFunny World Cup Headlines
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Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Love The World Cup Bees
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Robert Green Has World Cup Nightmare
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Superb England Crush Algeria
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England fail to beat Algeria due to Magic Pigeon
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Fabio 'Where's my Cap'-ello
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Russia Wins the World Cup in 2018
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Two headed python found living in Germany may be in training to take over from Paul the Psychic Octopus ready for the next World Cup of football
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England Win World Cup Of Smugness!
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World Cup Shock: NO ONE WINS!
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Unclear on the Concept, Trump Offers to Host Next Year's World Cup
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EU considering vuvu ban
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Vuvuzelas Can Be Heard 'Even After TV Has Been Switched Off'
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Spain v Holland disaster predicted
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French Football Code Of Conduct Revealed
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£460 Million spent for TWO votes at the FIFA World Cup bid.
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Vuvuzela Found Under Boy's Bed
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England's Great Sacrifice
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Illegal Immigrants Admit They Came to U.S. for Glenn Beck's Free Soccer Balls
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Heatwave Causes Mass Delusions
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Owen Gole Favourite To Win Golden Boot
