Enjoy a Steaming Cup of Fetus to Start Your Morning Right … Wing
Abortion rarely gets to be legal in Catholic countries. Some of the smarter, modern ones, like Ireland, grew up (in 2018, so not ancient history) and told their fecking priests to feck off and stop fecking telling a woman what to fecking do with her…
Read full storyScum Travels Around the World like Daft Punk
Oh those wacky Brazilians! They wanna be just like American scum! Will they take the long trek north to climb over the big wall? Hell no, they got their own country and they want it back! Storm the Bastille! Is everybody gonna try to overthrow…
Read full storyNever Trust Anybody Named George
I never trust anybody named George. George Washington was a terrorist insurgent with wooden teeth and an axe behind his back, ready and waiting to kill, kill, KILL! George HW Bush started the First Gulf War to make himself not look like a wimp,…
Read full storyA Sexy Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader Will Soon Become The Bride of A Multi-Billionaire Egyptian Prince
DALLAS - (Sports Satire) - Reporter Tortilla Torres with The Sports Mirror has just revealed that a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader, just spoke with her and informed her that she has resigned from the world-famous cheerleading squad. Madison Powergate,…
Read full storyThree men in a pub are discussing In the Night Garden
Fathers Shane Worthington, and Gary Johnson and single friend Martin Kipper spent some of their evening in The Ferret's Indecision in Chutney on the Fritz discussing the myriad charms of Children's television In The Night Garden. 'Do you remember…
Read full storyTampa Bay Buccaneers QB Tom Brady Says If The Bucs Do Not Win The Super Bowl He Will Join The Dallas Cowboys
TAMPA BAY, Florida - (Sports Satire) - Sportsapalooza writer Pia Confetti, spoke with Bucs quarterback Tom Brady, and he revealed a very interesting observation. Even though his team finished the NFL season with a lowly 8-9 regular season record,…
Read full storyTrump is the Biggest Corporate Crook in America
Trump is literally the Biggest Corporate Crook in America. Trump is 6ft., 3 inches and over 250 pounds. (His official Weight is a Coy 243 pounds.) Elon Musk is a trim 5 ft., 11 inches and 180 pounds. Jeff Bezos (with his 'Slumlord' Emplo…
Read full storyNew Robotic Surgery is the Wave of the Future - Penile Surgery To Be First
Robot Surgery is very close to commercial development. Corporations feel Penile Exchange surgery will be where the big Money is. It hasn't been done before because Human hands are not surgically precise enough. Soon men in London, Paris…
Read full storyIt’s Lonely Being An Old Terrorist
Strange news coming out of Iraq and Afghanistan on the terrorism front … A Spokesman for ISIS, the ever-popular terrorism organization, has said: “No one cares anymore. Remember the good old days, at the beginning of this century, when everybody…
Read full storyLondon's 'Daily Slander' - Prince Willie Tore a Necklace off Harry and Knocked Him Down
Another Bang-Up over the Palace. We paid a maid $20,000 pounds and got the whole story of how she heard the whole thing through a Keyhole. (Also got one of the Under Footman drunk and he corroborated her story. ) Harry clearly stated Willie tore…
Read full storyTrump Is Shocked As He Is Told That Florida Wants Him To Move Out of The State
TALLALHASSEE, Florida - (Satire News) - Word coming out of The Plywood State is that Gov. Ron DeSantis has just issued a mandate stating that he wants the twice impeached, presidential election "Loser" to vacate Mar-a-Lago and leave the state as soon…
Read full storyDeath to Antifa’s Apple Pie!
Good old-fashion American apple pie is dead – and you’re a scumbag for liking it! Apple pies will no longer be allowed to be made in America, largely due to protests by those who do not like apples and who are enraged that other people demand they…
Read full storyBurning Books is Good 4 You, Dummy
Books are evil. Every illiterate person knows this, but now those who can read will know it too. Soon there will be subtle commercials, in print and on TV and in product placements in movies, showing you all how evil it is to read. Reading may…
Read full storyCancelling the Dick
Cancel culture has filtered into all aspects of life. Some say this is a good thing, others not so much. Now pediatric hospitals around the cancelled world have decided that the old Judeo-Christian traditional of circumcising an infant male’s peni…
Read full storyMexico's Warship 'The Pancho Villa' Sinks One of Russia's Biggest Battleships
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre has informed the US news media that Mexico is reporting that their destroyer, The Pancho Villa, has attacked and sunk one of Russia's largest battleships, The Siberian…
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