Cancel culture has filtered into all aspects of life. Some say this is a good thing, others not so much.
Now pediatric hospitals around the cancelled world have decided that the old Judeo-Christian traditional of circumcising an infant male’s penis is actually … [cue horror movie music] … child mutilation!
Yes, that’s right, you are no longer allowed to have your doctor cut off your newborn boy’s foreskin. Would you cut off the kid’s fingers or toes? Of course not, that would be evil and cruel and twisted and sick.
But circumcision is okay … well, it was, in your father’s, and father’s father’s, and father’s father’s father’s … well, you get the gist … in the old time before cancelling, it was okay to hack and slash your own child’s body, or allow a professionally trained medical psychopath to do it for you.
It’s not known if the Muslim world will follow suit, or anyone else, whether through religion or traditional or just ‘cuz “everybody else is doing it, so we’ll keep doing it too” … what did your mama used to say? If your friends jumped off a bridge …
So in the future, all males will be uncut. Of course, those who were spanked when they were born, as a way of getting them to take their first breath, are also victims, and lawyers are standing by to take your call.
Join the class action lawsuit and sue every last asshole doctor – even if they’re old men or women, long retired, working on fly fishing or model trains – sorry, grandpa, you’re going to Alcatraz for mutilating 1000s of kids – just call yourself Doctor Mengele – you’re worse than Schwab, for foreskin’s sake!
