Trump Arrested In Central Park For Allegedly Molesting One Of The Ducks
MANHATTAN - (Satire News) - The Vox Populi News Agency is reporting that Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump has been taken in to custody (yet again). This time several witnesses reporting see the Mar-a-Lago Liar engaging in what really looked like a ca…
Read full storyA 5-Foot-4-Inch Japanese Player Is The Shortest First Baseman In The History of Major League Baseball
NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - Baseball fans all over America are in amazement at the newly-signed first baseman with the New York Yankees. Sports Bet Gazette is reporting that the player, who hails from Osaka, Japan, is without a doubt the sho…
Read full storyAfter Receiving Thousands of Death Threats Because of Roe V Wade Chief Justice John Roberts Says He May Resign
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - The Daily Drama News Agency is reporting that Chief Justice John Roberts is totally devastated, depressed, and scared out of his black robe, because he has received over 29,719 death threats since he voted for Roe V…
Read full storyJohnny Depp Heading Back to Court TV and More Stardom
A Hollywood insider has leaked news from a major television studio head (who refuses to be named) that a new show is in the works starring ... Johnny Depp! Fans loved seeing Johnny every day in the courtroom fighting the good fight against the evi…
Read full storySupreme Court to Biden - No Regulation of CO2 At U.S. Power Plants - Goodbye Earth
The Ultraconservative Supreme Court Majority just did its Bit to Ruin the Planet - Earth - forever. Biden can't regulate CO2 at US power plants - it's not in the Constitution. The dysfunctional, squabbling states, half of them run by Anti-e…
Read full storyTrump Hires The Village People To Play At His Mar-a-Lago Hawaiiian Luau Party For Marjorie Taylor Greene
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida - (Satire News) - Donald Trump has just annonuced that he will be throwing a Hawaiian Luau party for his girlfriend Marjorie Taylor Greene. The Big Mac Gobbler, said that Ivanka was going to help him with all of the arrangement…
Read full storyAlabama Has Capped The State's Only Volcano
CHICKEN DUMPLINGS, Alabama - (Satire News) - The state of Alabama has gone to a great expense to cap the state's only known volcano. The volcano, which was first discovered by bird hunter Caleb "Shotgun" Shaugnessy and his 13-year-old Boudro, has…
Read full storyThe Big Dick Makes A Cum-Back
The Greek god of fertility is making a comeback in modern-day America ever since the enlightened Supreme Court has ruled that women have no control over their reproductive systems. Priapus is all about dick. He’s got an oversized, constantly-erect…
Read full storyThe Waters of West Virginia's Monongahela River Have Mysteriously Turned Royal Blue
HILLBILLY HILL, West Virginia - (Satire News) - River experts are puzzled as to the reason why West Virginia's Monongahela River has turned royal blue. Several residents have said that they were afraid to put their fishing boats in the water for f…
Read full storyPresident Biden Will Be Signing A Presidential Executive Order Which Will Give Him The Power To Remove The Six Supreme Court Judges Who Voted To Overturn Roe V Wade
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - President Biden stated that there is more than one way to skin a Supreme Court decision. POTUS said that he was very disappointed at the six wimpy Supreme Court justices who seem to think that they are the keeper…
Read full storyThe FCC is Keepin’ It Real, Fuckers!
The FCC warns that Apple and Google and others should immediately take down Tik Tok from their app platforms. The reason given is that China is watching! Every time someone posts something on Tik Tok, China is keeping record. Names, where you live…
Read full storyHong Kong Panda Stew
The fascist dick-tater of China known as Shi-Ding-Dong arrived in Hong Kong to avow his reign of terror over whatever remaining Hong Kong people are left. “I promise you I will never let you know democracy – as you did under British rule – ever ag…
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