Vice President Mike Pence Takes Steps To Quash Donald Trump
The telephone operators at the Vice President’s residence listened to the conversations between Pence and the rest of the Cabinet. If the conversation was saleable, it pointed toward early retirement. “Time to send Trump back to Trump Tower. He’s…
Read full storyDVD Player Keeps 'Sticking' Halfway Through Films
There's nothing like settling back on the settee with the wife, a nice drink, and a packet of salt 'n' vinegar crisps, and watching a DVD, but one man has told how his enjoyment of these televisual feasts has been ruined recently, after his DVD playe…
Read full storyThe Latest Right Coast Revue Poll Shows Most Americans Consider Trump, McConnell, and Graham Low-Life Skum
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Ashburn Wasabi, with The Right Coast Revue, writes that the political phrase “Playing Politics” has never been more appropriate than it is today with the undisputed “King of Hatred” who sits in the White House, at lea…
Read full storyGinsberg’s Death Spurs Two Congressional Investigations.
Judge Ruth Bader Ginsberg’s death within just weeks of the presidential election is spurring two expedited congressional investigations. Adam Schiff, Chair of the House Intelligence Committee, is investigating whether the Russians, with Trump’s know…
Read full storyGinsburg To Be Stuffed And Mounted On Trigger In Branson Museum
BILLINGSGATE POST: The most famous dead horse in the world will be joined by Ruth Bader Ginsburg at a museum in Branson, Missouri, where Roy Rogers’ faithful steed Trigger is displayed. Trigger was a horse, of course. Like Ginsburg, who graduated…
Read full storyManchester United Set To Sign Player With Foreign Name
There's been frantic activity in the football transfer market this afternnon, with several of the top Premier League clubs swelling their ranks with a whole host of skilful, talented, overpaid primadonnas, who will, no doubt, take those clubs for eve…
Read full storyDallas Cowboys Players 'Snorted Cocaine' At Halftime, Claims Fan
The Dallas Cowboys like to do it the hard way, and they did it the hard way against Atlanta last night, after coming back from a huge first quarter deficit of 20 points, and a 29-10 halftime reverse, to steal the game away from the Falcons 'at the de…
Read full storyPhiladelphia Eagles' Wentz Booed Off the Field By Cardboard Fans
In Sunday’s game between the Philadelphia Eagles and the Los Angeles Rams, Eagles’ quarterback, Carson Wentz, was booed off the field after throwing his second interception of the game. While this was surprising, even more surprising was the fact th…
Read full storyGlobal bank purchases 5000 washing machines to launder their filthy money!
(NOT EDITED) German electro giants, Miele, have just done a mega-deal with a giant, global bank. They've flogged and delivered one of their most sufficient washing machines to locations all over the planet. The bank who purchased the machines, req…
Read full storyDak Prescott and The Dallas Cowboys Silence The Boo Birds
DALLAS – (Sports Satire) – The Dallas Cowboys started the game looking more like the Dallas Cowgirls as they fumbled, jumbled, and stumbled as if they were playing on ice. Jerry Jones’ Cowboys acted as if the ball was covered with 30 weight motor…
Read full storyA Kentucky Thoroughbred Race Horse Amazingly Gives Birth to Triplets
LOUISVILLE, Kentucky – (Sports Satire) – The world of thoroughbred racing has been turned upside down as news out of Louisville says that a race horse has given birth to triplets. The odds of a mare having twins is amazing, but giving birth to tri…
Read full storyNew York City Prostitutes Are Angry That President Trump Has Cut Off Their Unemployment Benefits
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) - Fox News is reporting that there are lots of unhappy, unemployed streetwalkers in the Big Apple. It seems that all of the city’s prostitutes are no longer receiving their unemployment benefits, since President Trump…
Read full storyTrump Moves To Create Tik Tok History Academies in Each State
Donald Trump announced today, with Bitsy Devoss by his side, a plan to create nationwide academies funded by Tik Tok, to teach what he claims to be "correct" American History. "Today, with the help of a Chinese-owned digital giant, we are announci…
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