Upside to Covid-19: Pension Funds Solvent!
Social Security Administration, Washington, D. C. Exclusive to The Spoof. The bean counters at the Social Security HQ quietly announced today that the retirement fund, expected to be bankrupt by 2035, will remain solvent for decades beyond that date.
Read full storyU.S. Held Hostage By Trump And His Gang
Yes, the United States is being held hostage by an incompetent Donald Trump, who illegitimately secured the White House in collaboration with Russia’s Vladimir Putin, whose middle finger was heavily placed on the election scale of 2016. The gang…
Read full storyLocal Housewife Comforted That Homeowners’ Association Will Support Her in These "Unprecedented Times"
(Carbondale, Illinois) In these times of uncertainty that surround the Coronavirus pandemic sweeping the globe, many people feel isolated, with few physical and social links to keep them grounded. To help understand this, we called Illinois resident...
Read full storyCare Home Owner Does Rounds Of Bedrooms Before Breakfast Checking For ' Dead Uns'
Care home owner, John 'Greedy Bastard' Mullett, has altered his morning routine due to the COVID-19 virus, and now does a quick sweep of bedrooms BEFORE breakfast checking for residents who may have passed away during the night. “The first thing I...
Read full storyDog With Two Assholes Rips Biden A New One
BILLINGSGATE POST: Joe Biden invited Pocahontas and Kamala (Breath) Harris to meet with him at Democrat Election Headquarters so that he might interview them, side-by-side, for the job of Vice-President. As usual, he had his adopted rescue dog, Majo...
Read full storyYour Problems Answered: IV
With This Week's Guest Editor: French Symbolist Writer and inventor of Pataphysics ALFRED JARRY Alfred Jarry didn't bottle things up. He expressed himself with abandon, especially in his ludicrous farcical play Ubu Roi, which prefigured the Theatr...
Read full storyIvanka Trump Reboots Her Clothing Line to do Her Part in Coronavirus War
Like distilleries now making hand sanitizer and the big three automakers converting assembly lines from automobiles to make ventilators, Ivanka Trump has restarted her clothing business to do her part in helping America get through this pandemic (all...
Read full storyMeghan McCain, Daughter of Senator John McCain, Says She Will Be Voting for Joe Biden
MANHATTAN – One of the hosts of The View, Meghan McCain, has surprised many Republicans with her recent political revelation. Meghan McCain, a life-long, dyed-in-the-wool, Republican, was asked if she is planning on voting for President Trump in N...
Read full storyThe Atlanta Falcons Organization is Considering Moving the Team out of Georgia
ATLANTA – In spite of the ongoing Coronavirus pandemic, the state of Georgia has decided to open up for business. But, although stores are opening up, customers are not exactly flocking back. One Atlanta shop owner, who sells crackers, reported...
Read full storyPresident Trump’s Long-Time Lawyer, Michael Cohen Caught Digging a Hole in His Prison Cell
MADRID, New York – President Trump’s former attorney and well-documented ‘fixer,’ recently said that he is going stir-crazy sitting in his tiny prison cell at New York state's infamous Sang Sung Prison. Michael Cohen (aka #7803219) is so desperate...
Read full storyFree Agent Nick Folk Says He Wants to Join Ex-Teammates Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski Down in Tampa Bay
FOXBOROUGH, Massachusetts – Nick Folk has been an NFL kicker for 12 years, and he is currently a free agent, having been released by the New England Patriots. Folk has expressed a strong desire to join ex-teammates Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski wit...
Read full storyBernie Sanders Insists His Endorsement of Joe Biden Almost as Enthusiastic as His 2016 Endorsement of Hillary Clinton
Weeks after suspending his own run for the Democratic presidential nomination, Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders issued a statement officially backing presumptive Democratic nominee Joe Biden, stating that his endorsement of Biden was almost as enthusia...
Read full storyThe City Where Coronavirus Cannot Penetrate
The Coronavirus has spread far and wide since it first sprang up out of a market in the Chinese city of Wuhan in January, and there isn't a country on the planet that has escaped its ravages, but one place, at least, has remained unaffected - Legola...
Read full storyRemote Scottish island misses visitors during lockdown
The remote Scottish island of Bunn receives few visitors, but those who do come are guaranteed a warm welcome. Many such island communities depend on tourism, and are struggling under the current coronavirus lockdown. "The government has told us...
Read full storyDisinfectant Out Of Stock In Many US Supermarkets
There were more scenes of panic-buying in many supermarkets and stores across ctantthe US yesterday, as customers forgot about the toilet paper, and made beelines, instead, for the aisles housing cleaning products, and more especially, disinfectant.
Read full storyIt Wasn’t Sarcasm But It Begins With An S
After being blasted by the world following Donald Trump’s suggestion of Clorox enemas and radiation gargle wash to fight coronavirus, the Trumper claimed he wasn’t stupid, no, no, be was only being sarcastic! Good try, Dopey. At least he didn’...
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