Nominated short film called 2 Girls 1 Cup for a Nobel Peace Prize
Berkley CA. USA - Professor Jillian Madison of University of California at Berkley has nominated short film called 2 Girls 1 Cup for a Nobel Peace Prize. "This is a very important find for Global Warming," Jillian Said, "It's em...
Read full storyKyla Ebbert New Employer is Bill Clinton
Kyla Ebbert was embarrassed last month when a jealous Southwest flight attendant from a San Diego flight told her to change her clothes so that her crotch would not be displayed. Since then she has been featured in Playboy and also was headlined wit...
Read full story2 Weeks - Just another conspiracy?
Today, Spoofmeister Mark Lowton announced that TheSpoof.com will suffer a loss of service for two weeks and claims that it is because of his honeymoon.
Read full storyHuckabee Discusses Creationism
Washington, USA -- Candidate Mike Huckabee is running full steam ahead toward the first January Primaries. The former baptist preacher sat down with me to discuss his beliefs about creation and evolution in light of recent reports about how his beliefs may hurt him in the upcoming election.
Read full storyChurch of England to Reinstitute Blood Sacrifice
Canterbury -- The Most Reverend and Right Honourable Dr. Rowan Williams, Archbishop of Canterbury, is taking the Church of England in a bold new direction. "It is time," he said, "and I feel it is right that religious worship return t...
Read full storyLicking Lindsay Lohan is Hottest New Thrill for Teens
Malibu, California -- In what is becoming an increasingly distressing and common trend for over privileged rich kids, Lindsay Lohan highs are leading to numerous hospitalizations and in some cases death.
Read full storyBeatles Cavern Club Just A Toilet
A leading British archaeologist said that the grotto whose discovery was announced this week in Liverpool was not the sacred cave linked to the legendary founding of the Mersey Sound spearheaded by the Beatles.
Read full storyFucking Residents Enjoy Fucking
VIENNA - A survey conducted by the Austrian government has revealed that residents of the village of Fucking, commonly referred to as Fuckers, are extremely satisfied with their place of residence.
Read full storyJudge orders Britney not to drive with her kids in the car; also, orders her not to chew bubble gum and walk at the same time
Los Angeles, California - After the judge saw the video tape of Britney running a red light with her kids in the car with her, he ordered Britney not to drive her kids around anymore, although she maybe present in the same vehicle with them. Britney...
Read full storyOral Roberts University president really sux say students
Tulsa, Oklahoma - (Ass Mess & Reuterus): Scholars at the beleaguered Oral Roberts University have voiced approval of their president finally getting booted off the campus after months of complaining about him being a snide little crook.
Read full storyCops probe Bush links to Prince Jefri UK assets heist
London - (Ass mess): The serial fraudster, former KGB agent, psychopathic fantasist and impersonator of the Sultan of Brunei's missing brother Prince Jefri is being probed for links to George W Bush after police found evidence his criminal rampag...
Read full storyO.J. Simpson: "If You're On The Strip..."
Former football star turned criminal O.J. Simpson could spend the rest of his life behind bars if he is found guilty of kidnapping, armed robbery and eight other counts. However, Simpson has other plans, and is suing Las Vegas for false advertising.
Read full storyBritney goes cold turkey for Thanksgiving: her and the kids have a Charlie Brown Thanksgiving dinner of buttered toast, popped corn, chips, pretzels and jelly beans
Hollywood, California - As per her court order, Britney spent Thanksgiving morning with her kids. However, not having the time to prepare and cook the traditional bird for Thanksgiving dinner, having only a few hours to spend with them, Britney turne...
Read full storyFormer SCHIP Recipients Form Paper Routes
Do you remember when you were young and needed a little extra cash to pay for that critical operation? Well, now that children that are no longer receiving SCHIP, they are finding it easier and easier to earn a little extra money to pay their health...
Read full storyPope trolls Hellfire Club chatrooms, appoints Archbishop Fergus McShergar as Cardinal
Vatican Shitty - (Ass Mess): "And I will make you fissures (sic) of men!" were the immortal words of the P2 Lodge grand wizard and Bishop of Rome as he deftly anointed the trembling lips, foreheads, breasts and bodily orifices of...
Read full storyNew missing data disc launched as mobile ringtone
Washington, Tyne/Wear - (Horrendous Mess): Following today's news that Revenue & Customs has lost six more child benefit data discs the Treasury is keeping mum about reports that the contents of one, containing a recorded tirade between HMRC sta...
Read full storyAustralia Boots Out Bush Ally John Howard
MELBOURNE (FMLiveWire) -- Conservative Prime Minister John Howard was humiliatingly defeated on Saturday at the hands of Labor's Kevin Rudd, who has promised to sign the Kyoto Protocol on global warming and withdraw Australia's combat troops...
Read full storyNobody Wants England Job
There was real drama at Football Association headquarters today when it emerged that NOBODY wants to manage the England national team.
Read full storyAre Hollywood Writers On Strike Or On Vacation?
(Hollywood) - As reported earlier, Hollywood's striking writers were not picketing the day before Thanksgiving. Now, it seems that the striking writers have taken a whopping 5 days off ...
Read full storyBreakfast Cereal Mascots Encourage Drug Use
GOLDEN VALLEY, MN - For years, parents have believed what they were giving their children for breakfast were completely innocent, nutritious, and healthy, sugar-laden cereals. Anti-drug activists, however, have revealed that those naive parents were...
Read full storySaudi Murder Victim To Be Executed
RIYADH - A 40-year-old Saudi businessman has been sentenced to death by the Saudi General Court after heinously refusing to prevent his own murder.
Read full storyPresident Bush To Make Announcement About Sinking Iceberg
An emergency Whitehouse announcement has been scheduled for 6pm on Sunday evening after an iceberg floating in the sea off Alaska started listing badly, putting millions of peoples' lives at risk...
Read full storyLost CDs Turn Up - Not Much Harm Done
The lost Child Benefit database CDs containing the personal information of more than 25million people, have been found 'safe and well' - one at a HMV store in Newcastle, the other at a branch...
Read full storyA-Rod Buys the Yankees
New York -- All star New York Yankees baseball player A Rod disclosed today that as part of his recent negotiation to stay with the Yankees, he was given an unprecedented 60% share of ownership of the team. "They didn't have enough money t...
Read full storyClinton Fundraising Fiasco: Not the Lincoln Bedroom
New York, USA -- Well, if you think Hillary Clinton's campaign is sailing smoothly along, that she is untouchable for the Democratic Nomination and will easily defeat Rudolf Guiliani for the Presidency, so does she. She has built a formidable p...
Read full storyHuckabee Furor: What's in a Name
New York -- Mike Huckabee has capitalized lately over reports that he is going back to his Serbian roots and changing his name back to Huckabij (pronounced Huck-A-Bitch). The name was changed by his paternal grandfather to Huckabee which had a much...
Read full storyGazprom Scraps Plan to Build Huge Skyscraper in Saint Petersburg
SAINT PETERSBURG - Russian natural gas giant Gazprom, which is poised to soon become the world's biggest corporation, has cancelled plans to build a very tall and controversial skyscraper as its headquarters in historic Saint Petersburg.
Read full storyApple Unveils New "iRod"
Cupertino, California - Following in the footsteps of the popular iPod and iPhone, Apple Inc. has announced an even more sensational marketing campaign this holiday season: the "iRod".
Read full storyAt least he died doing what he loved to do...
This has to be one of the falsest, most overused expressions of all time.
Read full storyBarry Bonds Reaches Out to Kids
Alcatraz, CA - While Barry Bonds has made some mistakes in his life, he's determined to make sure that other's do not fall into the same traps. After being sent to jail for perjury and obstruction to justice, Barry Bonds entered into a plea...
Read full storyCrypto-Fascists Plan Bombing to Support Rudy Rompson's Imperialist Campaign
PEARL HARBOUR, HI, USNA-- Presidential candidate Rudy "Mitt" Rompson was outed as a Fascist Party member after being linked to a fundraising website promising to reopen World War II on behalf of the Imperial Axis. His membership was proven...
Read full storyThis is Democracy.
Democracy is a state in which poor happily agree to continue to remain poor ever after.
Read full storyThe Bitch Had Three Mommies
Everyone knows that Lassie had several husbands (Jeff and Timmy being the most notable) but how many of you knew she had three mothers?...
Read full storyAnother day in the U.N.
It's a cold day at the U.N. delegation and people are expected to be involved in heavy arguments. Prince Charles starts the processions with an inspirational speech.
Read full storyGreeter Sleeps In On Black Friday
Denver, (AP) - Hundreds of shoppers lined up in front of a Wal-Mart were dismayed and shocked to find the store had not opened at 4:00 AM as expected on Black Friday. Apparently, the greeter who was to open the store forgot to show up to work.
Read full storyShakespeare bus driver insults patron
It's a cloudy day in London and traffic is heavy. A woman is about to board a famed British bus on her way to the local supermarket to pick up some milk for her baby.
Read full storyBritney Strikes Back! She hires her own private dick to dig up the dirt on K-Fed and find his career
Hollywood, California - Fed up with K-Fed's private dick poking about in her face, digging deep into her most private affairs, putting the screws on her, snooping around her back door, Britney decided to hire one of her own and do the same to K-F...
Read full storyMusharraf warns of world-wide attacks by 'militants based in Pakistan' - Fucking (Austria), Climax and Dildo (Canada) and Gayhead (Mass. USA) top targets!
Having been booted out of the Commonwealth and forced to agree to the return of exiled arch-enemy Nawaz Sharif, the GenMush spin machine went into full attack.
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