VIENNA - A survey conducted by the Austrian government has revealed that residents of the village of Fucking, commonly referred to as Fuckers, are extremely satisfied with their place of residence.
"Those Fuckers really enjoy Fucking," said Dr. Gerhardt Shultz, whose research was aimed at determining the level of satisfaction Austrians feel for their home towns. "According to our data, the Fuckers were 100% Fucking satisfied."
"Yah, I really love Fucking," said Anna Stein, owner of Fucking Tavern. "Tonight ve vill have a big Fucking party to celebrate zis news."
Fucking, with a scant population of 93, is a picturesque village located a mere 4 kilometers from the Austrian-German border. Its residents consider it 'a Fucking great place to live' - a rough translation of the town slogan.
"I enjoy Fucking, and my big cock loves it too," said farmer Jan Wurtner, as he stroked his German Langshan rooster - the Fucking County Fair champion.
"Even zo it ees in zee middle of Fucking nowhere, I ees not surprised even a little bit by zese Fucking findings," added Berhnard Reich, who works at the Fucking post office. "Everyone who has been Fucking loves it. Ve have everything you Fucking need."
Despite the survey results, some residents are convinced that Fucking does have its downsides. "Ooh Fucking ees vonderful, but zometimes it makes my pussy too vet and sloppy," commented villager Amelia Gartner, as she toweled off her pet tabby. "Zankfully zough, zis rainy and vet season only lasts a few veeks, and zen it's back to zee beautiful veather."
The village, although qiuet, is known for its hospitality, and all guests who stop by, even if only for a short Fucking time, are truly appreciated. "Please come Fucking vith us," said Gertrude Klaus, a Fucking school teacher who loves to see Fucking visitors.
While in Fucking, guests are encouraged to visit the Fucking souvenir shop and get some Fucking post cards so they can tell friends and family from around the world all about their Fucking adventures.
