Corrupt Bastards Club ready to dump Gonzales
Washington DC - (Ass Mess): Alberto 'VO5' Gonzales is to be dumped on Monday by the Corrupt Bastards Club amid reports that US oil industry graft specialist VECO has turned over incriminating documents to the Alaska State Prosecutor's off...
Read full storySquirell Gets Sick
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Dublin - TheSpoof.com writer Squirell of Moose&Squirell fell drastically ill outside of TheSpoof.com headquarters. Writers and the editor rushed to her side to see if they could aid her. They tried mouth to mouth, CPR, and fi...
Read full storyBush Gets Burned Freebasing
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington, D.C. - President George W. Bush, while trying to freebase cocaine, set the desk he was using on fire and burned his tie off.
Read full storyBuckingham Palace tosser running Iraq security contracts
London - (Ass Mess): Sir Malcolm Tosser, equerry to Old Fatty Mountbatten and Master of the Pretender to the Throne's Household, has got himslef a nice little earner flogging shares in his security company which has contracts in Iraq, Sudan, Nige...
Read full storySolid Evidence Found That Paris Hilton Is Innocent Of All Charges
Proof found in a secretly recorded conversation that Paris Hilton was set up by the LAPD, as reported to Stanley Harris by a reliable source - transcript below.
Read full storyPrince Harry's unit deploys to Mahiki Night Club in London.
Following much discussion, Prince Harry's unit has finally deployed to Mahiki in London last Saturday night.
Read full storyCorrupt Bastards Club's Lord Browne blamed for Saudi arms-for peerages
London - (Ass Mess): Police are investigating the role of ex-BP CEO and Corrupt Bastards Club grandee Lord Browne in the gagging of the Serious Fraud Office's probe into arms manufacturer/dealer BAE Systems which is the UK's corruption flagsh...
Read full storyGrand Theft Auto San Andreas Stories
The popular game series from Rockstar, GTA as he players refer to it has become hugely succesful from GTA1 to GTA Vice City Stories. As many know the GTA games are based on real places Vice City/Miami, San Andreas/San Francisco/Hollywood/Las Vegas, Liberty City/New York and much more but what one gamer James "Angst" Focknut Murphy shouted as he threw his Playstation 2 out the window alon...
Read full storyA.G. Alberto Gonzales Not Guilty: Case Closed, Gonzales Says
After the conviction of Vice President Cheney's aide Scooter Libby and the resignation of Deputy Attorney General Paul J. McNulty, many in the media have accused top Bush administration of forcing others to take the wrap for crimes that they did...
Read full storyRuth Badger Takes Over Badly Run RSPCA
Ruth Badger, aggressive businesswoman rival of Sir Alan Sugar, has today confirmed that she will be taking over the ailing RSPCA, which will be rechristened Badgers and Other Animals Rights (BOAR).
Read full storyLampard out, divided self splits for Barca
FRANK 'Lamps' Lampard threw a wet and unpleasantly musty smelling blanket over Chelsea fans celebrations at their historic FA Cup win at the new Wembley Stadium.
Read full storyCal-el's New Campaign Song
He Flew to Earth from Krypton (To the tune of Blazing Saddles Theme Song)...
Read full storyMichael Moore "Sicko" Movie Frightens UK Doctors
Michael Moore's controversial new movie "Sicko" which highlights flaws in the US Health Care system has struck fear into the hearts of UK doctors, who are already aware that everything that happens in the US comes to the UK exactly four...
Read full storySchwarzenegger Runs for President: Discovers US Birth Certificate
California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger announced today that he is running for the Republican nomination for the 2008 presidential election.
Read full storyDick Cheney Admits He Uses Hookers
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Vice President Dick Cheney has finally acknowledged that he has hired hookers in the past.
Read full storySaul Anuzis Withdraws Petition to Boot Ron Paul from Debates
ANN ARBOR (AP) - Michigan Republican National Committee Chairman Saul Anuzis has reacted to public outrage and withdrawn his petition to kick Congressman Ron Paul out of the Republican presidential debates. He issued the following statement:...
Read full storyBritney Spears' New Hair Extensions Are Lindsay Lohan's Pubes
Britney Spears revealed her new controversial hairstyle today as it emerged that Britney's pals have all donated their pubic hair to make enough hair extensions to cover her recently shaved bonce.
Read full storyDavina McCall Sacked from Big Brother
In a shock move Entemol, producers of the popular Big Brother reality TV show , have sacked presenter Davina McCall for not being pregnant in time for this years "show."...
Read full storySteroid Use can Make You Really Ugly Warns Stallone
In a shocking statement today police have revealed that there are 42,000 steroid users in the UK, on a par with heroin abuse. Today's teenagers and sad older men, yearning for a rippling muscular body are downing the drugs like there's no tomorrow. A...
Read full storyGeorge Michael Admits Drug Addiction in Shock Statement
In a headline grabbing admission singer George Michael had admitted he is addicted to prescription drugs to the 2% of the worlds population who hadn't already guessed.
Read full storyCalves Protest at Mars Bars U-turn
The National Union of Calves today released a statement condemning Masterfoods for their u-turn in using mashed up dead baby calf in its chocolate products.
Read full story3 (sort-of) New Yorkers will vie for US Presidency in 2008
The 2008 Presidential election could come down to a three-way face-off among three candidates who all have connections of varying strength with the city that David Letterman's announcer Alan Kalter identifies five nights a week as "the great...
Read full storyMcCartney Doesn't Read the Spoof Anymore
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - London - Paul McCartney said that he doesn't read TheSpoof.com anymore because it's just too painful thinking of all that money he lost in his divorce.
Read full storyJay Leno Exposed To Excessive Radiation
It was supposed to be a routine chest X-Ray, but for Tonight Show host Jay Leno, the result was exposure to a dangerously high level of radiation.
Read full storySteve Jobs of Apple Announces Mac on a Chip
Steve Jobs announced today that Apple has pulled off another technological feat, putting everything that goes into a Macintosh computer onto a single chip. The new series of computers will be called the iChip.
Read full storyGlobal Warming Spawns New Crisis: Spatial Warming
Global warming experts have discovered a new problem associated with the coming catastrophe. Top NASA scientist James E. Hansen points to a growing concern over spatial warming.
Read full storyAll Soldiers Stationed in Iraq are Missing
In a stunning setback to the Bush administration's war efforts, every American soldier serving in Iraq is missing. Pentagon officials are at a loss to explain the disappearance.
Read full storyFriends say Heather Mills duped husband Paul over baby's paternity
London - (Ass Mess): The acrimonious divorce negotiations between Heather Mills and Paul McCartney took a turn for the worse today after the couple's former best man said that little Beatrice is the daughter of 'an anonymous Californian photo...
Read full storyHillary Clinton for President: Reasons Why She Will Win
Below are some reasons why Hillary Clinton will win the 2008 Presidential Election:...
Read full storyMichael Jackson Joins British Military
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - London - In an effort to gain the title Sir Michael Jackson, Michael Jackson has joined the military and bribed Tony Blair $1,000,000 pounds Sterling. Michael Jackson didn't realize that Tony Blair was on his way out becau...
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