New Social Work Guidelines

Radical new guidelines have been issued for social workers in England. From April 1st, 2011 local authorities will be allowed to place children for adoption with families of a different ethnicity. Previously, social workers were reluctant to do so...

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Local Man Looks Forward to Waiting Now Waiting is Over

Funny story: Local Man Looks Forward to Waiting Now Waiting is Over

Local Man, and one-time entrepreneur, Seaton Carew today announced he was looking forward to waiting for his new business venture to explode into the public eye now that his seven month wait for his charity work is coming to an end. The charity work, which involved playing dominoes and bingo with old people, finishes on Wednesday and whilst it was sometime rewarding Carew, 41, was not immune to...

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Couples Urged To Take Out Wedding Insurance

Funny story: Couples Urged To Take Out Wedding Insurance

Urgent advice has been issued to couples planning their wedding. The Financial Ombudsman Service is making a national appeal to ensure that insurance is taken out in case something goes wrong and the event is ruined. For less than 1% of the tot...

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Democrats Urge Obama to Deliver Bigger Stimulus Package

Funny story: Democrats Urge Obama to Deliver Bigger Stimulus Package

Democrats are urging that the President send every American family $1,000 in another effort to stimulate the economy. "The $250 we sent out before wasn't enough to get people spending once again", stated Barney Frank. "Now Americans are beginning...

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Taylor Lautner Claims Rob Pattinson Sniffs Kristen Stewart's Panties

Funny story: Taylor Lautner Claims Rob Pattinson Sniffs Kristen Stewart's Panties

As Robert Pattinson was talking with a group of Twilight fans at a staged event where the actors from the Twilight movies travel and promote the show, Taylor Lautner was beside him when he heard Pattinson joke about Lautner falling asleep once and be...

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Lady Gaga, Justin Bieber Tell ABC They are Basically Shy People

Funny story: Lady Gaga, Justin Bieber Tell ABC They are Basically Shy People

Glitter star Lady Gaga and singer Justin Bieber tell a surprised Robin Roberts on 'ABC's Good Morning America' this past week that both are basically very shy people. This was Lady Gaga's second day talking to a major audience in a two part series an...

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Single Voice Wins Male Voice Choir Award

Funny story: Single Voice Wins Male Voice Choir Award

It could only happen in Wales, but My God Man has it happened! History has been made at the Annual Male Voice Choir Awards where Bryn 'The Voice' Teflon-Williams has won the award single-handed! Forty Two of the Country's finest choirs made th...

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Scotland 3012 .A.D

Funny story: Scotland 3012 .A.D

The second report by a 2012 A.D. archaeologist as he excavates Scotland. "Following my first excursion into the north west of the landmass, I travelled for approximately 60 miles in an Easterly direction to a much smaller site than previously. Located on the periphery of a small, but well-to-do urban establishment, this compact structure was relatively well preserved . In fact, the evidence w...

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Ageism could be 'hitting' The Spoof within the month

Funny story: Ageism could be 'hitting' The Spoof within the month

Ageism and its 'fallout', could, indeed, be 'hitting' the pages of The Spoof within the month. It is rumoured that the owner of this popular site is getting a little tired of the 'older' writers as they often appear to be under the infuluence of medications, or other 'mind altering substances' when they write. He accepts that many older writers are suffering from arthritis, high blood pres...

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Scotland 3011 A.D

Funny story: Scotland 3011 A.D

What would an archaeologist in a thousand years time find if he excavated in the Glasgow area ? "One of the most interesting discoveries during my lifelong project of excavating sporting venues in the Western European Continental Peninsula occurred when I had to journey into the northwest of the landmass where a large metropolitan colony once existed. While there were more than a few sit...

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Dundee United Boss Accuses Hearts

Funny story: Dundee United Boss Accuses Hearts

Dundee United manager Peter Houston was livid after seeing his side lose 2-1 to third placed Heart of Midlothian at Tynecastle. Hearts scored an 88th minute winner through Marius Zaliukas, but worse was to follow for the Tangerines when their top...

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New Geoff Hurst Controversy

Funny story: New Geoff Hurst Controversy

England World cup hero Sir Geoff Hurst has become embroiled in a controversy after allegedly committing a driving offence on the continent. The former striker, whose extra time goal in the World Cup final against West Germany caused a furore, had...

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'Got Cannabis?' Ad Campaign Convinces Big Names to Star in Commercials

Funny story: 'Got Cannabis?' Ad Campaign Convinces Big Names to Star in Commercials

In one of the largest attempts yet to get the word out on legalization of marijuana in California, a large Los Angeles public relations firm by the name of Blunt and Schuster (BSPR) has come up with a 'Got Cannabis?' ad campaign that will star some h...

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Members of The Really Free School Collective are suing Guy Ritchie

Funny story: Members of The Really Free School Collective are suing Guy Ritchie

Squatters belonging to The Really Free School Collective have been evicted from the $12 million home owned by Guy Ritchie in London, England. Apparently, they took the house over as it had been empty for quite a while and, in their eyes, is a wast...

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Prince William Is Royally Thrilled Over The New "Kiss Me Kate" Beer

MAIDENHEAD, England - The Windsor Castle Brewing Company of Maidenhead has announced that it will soon be distributing its latest product Kiss Me Kate Beer. Head brewer Chichester Croxtonworth told a reporter for Tickety Boo News that he worked di...

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Our Man In Kabulshit lands plum arms export role

Funny story: Our Man In Kabulshit lands plum arms export role

London - (Baksheesh): Britain's former Afghani ambassador has landed a lucrative new job advising the UK national arms exporter BAe on new business abroad. Media sources said this weekend that the government body 'which exhumes and approves moves...

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Bahraini protesters attack ex-Michael Jackson house

Funny story: Bahraini protesters attack ex-Michael Jackson house

Manama - (Groomers): A furious mob has gathered outside the lavish Manama mansion that Bahraini princelet and aspiring song writer Abdullah Hamad Al Khalifa once 'gave' to singer Michael Jackson. They pelted it with stones and bricks amid a police...

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Interview With The Vampire

Funny story: Interview With The Vampire

"And you, Mr. Alberto Fisher are a real Vampire?" "Yesss, pardon the hisss but the teeth you know." "How do you know that you are a vampire? I see your reflection in the camera lens." "An old Wifesssss tail, I asssssure you. My thong is riding up." "Your thong?" "Yesss, I love to wear a thong. Feelssss good all under asssss the commercial usssed to sssay." "Do you drink blood?"...

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Jake Ormerod arrest: Devon cops probe Michael Jackson trail

Funny story: Jake Ormerod arrest: Devon cops probe Michael Jackson trail

Devon - (Groomers): Accused predator Jake Ormerod's arrest has shocked locals who've long forgotten Michael Jackson's 2003 Exeter City Football Club rant. The 19 year-old suspect is allegedly part of a Devon-wide paedo ring that's just been busted...

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Grantham's World Record

Funny story: Grantham's World Record

The Lincolnshire town of Grantham, famed for being the town that produced Margaret Thatcher, has produced something even more indigestible. Grantham has now brought forth the hottest chilli in the world, as judged by the Guinness Book of Records.

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Simon Cowell Wants Kate Middleton To Take Cheryl Cole's Place On X-Factor

Funny story: Simon Cowell Wants Kate Middleton To Take Cheryl Cole's Place On X-Factor

LONDON - Simon Cowell, the man who has the Midas touch has let it be known that he has asked Kate Middleton to be the new judge on X-Factor. The 51-year-old mogul who heads 19th Hole Productions has signed former X-Factor judge Cheryl Cole to be o...

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Revealed: Nina Dobrev Caught Skinny-Dipping With Friend Last Year

Funny story: Revealed: Nina Dobrev Caught Skinny-Dipping With Friend Last Year

When a reporter heard Nina Dobrev and some of her friends giggling just after a session in which the crew of "The Vampire Diaries" answered some questions about the television program and if there will be a movie soon, he cornered the group of four l...

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Sarah, Duchess of York not invited to Wills and Kate's bash due to World Tour!

Funny story: Sarah, Duchess of York not invited to Wills and Kate's bash due to World Tour!

Buckingham Palace, LONDON: Prince Andrew's ex, Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of York, will not be attending the high society bash of the year at Westminister Abbey. Sarah, Duchess of York, also known as Fergie, is persona non grata in some quarters, si...

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Wisconsin Teachers Storm State House, Demand Hosni Mubarek Step Down

Funny story: Wisconsin Teachers Storm State House, Demand Hosni Mubarek Step Down

Teachers in the state of Wisconsin, angry over having to pay their fair share via budget cutbacks, stormed the state Capitol building, demanding higher wages, paid vacation and the ouster of Egyptian president Hosni Mubarek. "We've used a paid sic...

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Cosmetic Surgery: Not always a pretty fact to face!

Funny story: Cosmetic Surgery: Not always a pretty fact to face!

The order made by Libya's Colonel Muammar Al-Gaddafi - to cut off all electricity power to the major cities - has failed to stem the anger of the people. Though the action has removed their access to the internet it was nevertheless taken too lat...

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President Kennedy's Cause of Death Was a Misdiagnosed 'Complex Migraine," say Doctors

Funny story: President Kennedy's Cause of Death Was a Misdiagnosed 'Complex Migraine," say Doctors

Following the recent diagnosis of L.A. news reporter Serene Branson's on-air palsy attack, doctors have revealed that President Kennedy's cause of death was a misdiagnosed "complex migraine," "It makes a ton of sense, right?" said a researcher for...

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Massive Solar Flare Wipes Out Siberian Town of Novisbriskik

Funny story: Massive Solar Flare Wipes Out Siberian Town of Novisbriskik

Although last week's big solar flare knocked out some communications and caused other smaller problems, it was only when the Siberian Train System was restored and made it's way into the farthest reaches of Siberia did the worst damage come to light.

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Australia: Now the Big Freeze

Funny story: Australia: Now the Big Freeze

Australians are looking forward to skiing holidays in their Blue Mountains as Weather Patterns have misread Australia for Austria. In the reverse direction Vienna is experiencing a heat wave and find their cricket team is limbering up ready for the A...

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Banks Show the Way

Funny story: Banks Show the Way

Following the lead of Barclays Bank the rest of the people in Britain are now going to paying 1% in tax. This move follows the Government honouring their statement that 'we all in this together'. The Treasury is busy advising everyone of the ne...

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Rooney Excels In Spelling Test

Funny story: Rooney Excels In Spelling Test

These days we are always hearing about how all our footballers are earning far too much money and are such terrible role models for children everywhere. So it's always nice when we hear a good news story. This week, Manchester United Superstar W...

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Peace deal leaves palestinian families fatherless

Funny story: Peace deal leaves palestinian families fatherless

PALESTINE - In an ironic twist of events, a no-strings-attatched peace deal struck with Israel this weekend has left 90% of Palestinian families without a father. After a strong exchange of views during peace negotiations this morning, leaders on bot...

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Missing abolone diver found alive

Funny story: Missing abolone diver found alive

A missing South Australian abolone diver has been found alive and well this morning. The sudden disappearance of the man on Thursday sparked a massive search and rescue operation lasting an agonising five minutes. A morning beach walker found the...

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Egypt's enslaved men need their own revolution

Funny story: Egypt's enslaved men need their own revolution

A few months before the revolution, there were articles written on the sexual enslavement of married men in Cairo. News of men being forced to father children with women during Egypt's uprising, shows the sexual slavery of men has not gone away. From my own experience, a few Egyptian women wrote me letters asking me for marriage expecting that I surrender to them in sexual bondage though mar...

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Uproar Over Snoods

Funny story: Uproar Over Snoods

Its the fashion accessory that is sweeping the football world. Premier stars such as Carlos Tevez of Man City and Arsenal's Samir Nasri have been sporting it all through the winter. Its the snood - and it may be getting banned. A FIFA spokesman...

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Clegg Pushes The Alternative Vote

Funny story: Clegg Pushes The Alternative Vote

Coalition deputy leader Nick Clegg has launched the campaign for the Alternative Vote. Speaking at a conference of small businessmen in Taunton yesterday, Clegg stated that" this is not about me, this is all about introducing a voting system in Br...

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President Barack Obama Invites Ricky Gervais and Piers Morgan To A White House Beer Drinking Party On 'Presidents Day'

Funny story: President Barack Obama Invites Ricky Gervais and Piers Morgan To A White House Beer Drinking Party On 'Presidents Day'

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Barack Obama recently telephoned Piers Morgan and told him that he had seen him interviewing Ricky Gervais on his new CNN show Piers Morgan Tonight. The president congratulated Morgan for stepping in and filling the si...

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Origins of National Mourning Identified

Funny story: Origins of National Mourning Identified

After studying the issue of national mourning for the last 2 years, sociologists at the Institute of Deep Thinking have come up with the theory that our increasing capacity for public outpourings of grief is inextricably linked with the premature dea...

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Miley Cyrus and Bob Dylan Announce Their Upcoming Concert Tour - 'The Poet & The Lap Dancer Springtime Tour'

Funny story: Miley Cyrus and Bob Dylan Announce Their Upcoming Concert Tour - 'The Poet & The Lap Dancer Springtime Tour'

LOS ANGELES - Miley Cyrus said that after the Grammy Award ceremony she got to meet a person who she has admired ever since she was three-years-old. The teen queen even pointed out that her father the former country music singer Billy Ray Cyrus al...

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Coalition Agree To Disagree

Funny story: Coalition Agree To Disagree

Prime Minister David Cameron and Deputy Prime Minster Nick Clegg have both made statements emphasising that the upcoming referendum on changing the voting system will not wreck the Coalition. Although the Liberal Democrat leader has called for the...

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The Jonas Brothers Deny Any Involvement In The Indianapolis Ticket Scalping Scandal

Funny story: The Jonas Brothers Deny Any Involvement In The Indianapolis Ticket Scalping Scandal

RALEIGH, North Carolina - The Jonas Brothers performed their third encore at The Nicotine Stained Ashtray Auditorium and left the stage. Tequila Tallyho with The Left Coast Mirror Magazine met them in their dressing room for a scheduled interview...

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Wisconsin Democratic Senators Found Hiding Out in Chilean Mine

Funny story: Wisconsin Democratic Senators Found Hiding Out in Chilean Mine

Up until Friday, no one had a clue where the Democratic Senators from Wisconsin were hiding out in protest of controversial budget repair bill being pushed through the Senate by Wisconsin Governor, Scott Walker. The Senators claim the bill would stri...

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Rosie O'Donnell Viciously Lashes Out At The Producers of 'Glee' Due To The Fat Cast Member

Funny story: Rosie O'Donnell Viciously Lashes Out At The Producers of 'Glee' Due To The Fat Cast Member

HOLLYWOOD - Rosie O'Donnell who admits to being a little bit overweight has lashed out at the producers of the hit musical show Glee. O'Donnell stated that she does not like the fact that the one overweight member of the entire cast Lauren Zizes,...

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Celebrity Dog Has A Sniff

Funny story: Celebrity Dog Has A Sniff

Incoming reports appear to confirm that the dog of a famous celebrity with an ego larger than the north face of Everest was out and about today in London's fashionable Notting Hill district, sniffing around. An unnamed celebrity dog walker, named...

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Whatsisname And - That There Woman - Caught Up In Lascivious Scandal

Funny story: Whatsisname And - That There Woman - Caught Up In Lascivious Scandal

Whatsisname, the famous celebrity bloke who - oh, you know who I mean - the merciless gold digger, and his wife - you know the one; she was a guest on Alan Titchmarsh, and once went on a bender with Paul O'Grady at the Harpo Club... Anyway - they'...

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Simon Cowell Disgusted with Performance of Season Ten Idol Judges

Funny story: Simon Cowell Disgusted with Performance of Season Ten Idol Judges

Simon Cowell, judge extraordinaire of seasons one through nine of American Idol, finally felt it was his duty to step up and give a grade to this season's newly hired judges, Steven Tyler and Jennifer Lopez, and it was far from kind. Unfortunately, h...

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Subo Attacked By Man With Foot Fetish!

Funny story: Subo Attacked By Man With Foot Fetish!

Singer Susan Boyle told police in London that she had been attacked by a man with a foot fetish backstage after a recent performance there. "I was going to my dressing room and it was late because of several encores so there weren't as many people...

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Crawley Town Know How To Handle Manchester United Says Boss Steve Evans

Funny story: Crawley Town Know How To Handle Manchester United Says Boss Steve Evans

No sooner had the the FA Cup Draw paired mighty Goliaths Manchester United with plucky non-league would-be Davids Crawley Town than Crawley manager Steve Evans' phone was going ballistic, writes The Daily Shitstirrer's Football Bullshit Cashcow Corre...

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Bahrain Turmoil: US Fifth Fleet Commander Pleads The Fifth Over Buried UFO Warfleet

Funny story: Bahrain Turmoil: US Fifth Fleet Commander Pleads The Fifth Over Buried UFO Warfleet

Manama - (X-Files): Like Cairo's legendary Sphinx Captain Bruce H Lindsey, Commander of the Carl Vinson and US 5th Fleet Commander Vice Admiral Mark I Fox were staying tight-lipped tonight. A few miles down the road in Manama civil turmoil was ra...

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