Queen discovered trussed and naked 'like David Carradine' in Palace sex romp cubbyhole
London - (Royal Perversion Mess): "Just another closet queen hoist by her own petard!" was the only comment from royal protection officers this morning after a gagged and naked Queen Elizabeth was discovered trussed up, a la David Carradine, in a se...
Read full storyThe Damn Hurricane Season Is Here!
GALVESTON - Well hurricane season is here once again. And the Texas coast city of Galveston is still digging out from the bashing that it received from Hurricane Ike last September. Galveston Hurricane Center Authorities report that every day they...
Read full storySuperhuman Powers for Clockwork Power Genius
Trevor Bayliss - the so called "inventor" of the clockwork radio (a radio with a clockwork motor - genius?) has again come up trumps. His latest obsessional piece of clockwork trickery involved experimenting on himself - "A bit like Marie Curie" he...
Read full storyRear Vice Admiral Morse Calls Off QM2 Transatlantic Trip
South Carolina based nautical hero, Rear Vice Admiral Morse, one time captain of HMS Buggerall out of the port of Bristol today called off a planned trip to Europe on the QM2, where he would have tracked down some Norwegian and German ancestors. R...
Read full storyPresident Obama Has An Official "Taster"
A US "taster" tested the food being dished up to President Barack Obama at a dinner in a French restaurant, a waiter said on Sunday. "They have someone who tastes the dishes," said waiter Hobriel de la ti da Arrvalho from the "La Fontaine de Bars" restaurant where Obama and his family turned up for dinner on Saturday night. "Not only that, there are fools who come in and entertain the girls bet...
Read full storyNew Labour Cabinet
Minister of Looking Like A Lizard - Gordon Brown Minister of Speaking Like A Poofter - Gordon Brown Minister of Shiting Himself Every Time Mandy Walks Into The Room - Gordon Brown Minister of Looking Like A Skunk And Getting Caught Stealing - Alastair Darling Minister of Red Swine 'Flu - Hazel Bleary-Memory Minister of Doing Everything The USA Tells You To Do - Gordon Brown Minis...
Read full storyMonty Gordon's Flying Circus
[cue American marching band music and surreal cartoons, then ...] Alastair: I wish to make a complaint about this here labour party that I bought here, to wit, thirteen years ago Gordon: What's wrong wiv it? Alastair: Since I took it home, it hasn't moved Gordon: Maybe it's thinking hard about defrauding its owners. Look, it moved then! Alastair: You pushed it! Gordon: No I didn'...
Read full storyBiden Reassures Japan About NKorean Bomb! "No Civilized Country Would Use Such A Thing!"
In a surprise visit to Japan, Vice President Joe Biden visited the presidential palace as well as the Japanese Diet and made a short speech to the gathered assembly. "We have been hearing that our friends here in Japan are extremely uncomfortable about North Korea developing an atomic bomb." "Let me assure you, one and all, to tell your people that they have nothing to worry about." "Just...
Read full storyJalapenoMan Vows To Return
There's been much concern this weekend over the apparent disappearance of UK Dudley based Spoof writing supremo Monkey Woods, who is believed to have gone off with a 'dirty woman' for a bit of rumpy pumpy, or been admitted to a clinic following an em...
Read full storyFemale Bodybuilder Mistaken For Man In Dutch Weed Cafe
A female bodybuilder from New Jersey was challenged to a fight last night in a weed smokers cafe in the Netherlands. Dora Piebottom, 32, of Hackensack, New Jersey, who it must be admitted looks a bit like a bloke, with all the big muscles and stuf...
Read full storySpoof Writer Monkey Woods Admitted To Clinic Following Embarrassingly Easy Chess Victory
Spoof writers from all over the globe have recently expressed concerns over the apparent disappearance of Spoof writing Dudley based legend Monkey Woods. Various theories have been expounded on the writers lack of recent activity, ranging from bei...
Read full storyMan With World's Largest Penis Goes Into Hiding - Overexposure Blamed
An American man, reportedly the possessor of the world's largest penis went into hiding yesterday evening at 7:32 pm Mountain Time, blaming over exposure for his inability to cope. The man, allegedly a close acquaintance of legendary Spoof writer...
Read full storyThe Comedy Event of the Year: Dick Cheney's "Save My Ass" tour
HOLLYWOOD, CA - Dick Cheney, one of the funniest comedians to come out Washington, D.C. in years, announced the start of his national comedy tour, "Save My Ass." Dick will bring his bizarre take on life and famous deadpan delivery to comedy clubs and...
Read full storyJeffrey Archer can make this up
Disgraced Prisoner and stealer of other people's ideas Jeffrey Archer has said that the current melt-down at Labour Headquarters is a classic story that he wrote more than 15 years ago. The waster of trees told us: 'All of this that is happening n...
Read full storyBranson becomes Fosset
Shares in Richard Branson fell dramatically today when it was disclosed that he is in fact the late Steve Fossett. Mr Branson, who has undertaken many daring feats for the sake of publicity has now admitted the ultimate publicity coup - that he in f...
Read full storyWindow Dressing
Following her leaving Parliament, thinking Politician's crumpet Caroline Flint has a new job working for Marks and Spencer as a Window Dresser. Ms Flint, 37, and 'lovely' according to the three politicians who are remaining is said to be pleased w...
Read full storyFederer suggests gravel dust caused him to weep after hearing of Nadals surprise exit!
Roger Federer seen weeping at Roland Garros for the first time ever has explained to bemused reporters the reason for his emotional breakdown. "My tears are not tears of jubilation because that Spanish, Mallorcan, puta madre, pretender to my crown...
Read full storyAmy Winehouse Cancels Again, Keeps Most Of Ticket Money
Amy Winehouse has, of all things, cancelled her scheduled performance next week according to her new manager, or someone who appeared before a microphone and announced that she is now Amy's new manager. "Amy will be spending a few days or weeks at...
Read full storyEquator packs bags and moves to Europe?
After years of being settled neatly between the Tropics of Cancer and Capricorn, sources close to the Equator yesterday sensationally revealed that it feels like it's time to move on. Though no facts are currently available, and are unlikely...
Read full storyApprentice shock - shameless update
In a major upset today the results of this years yet to be run apprentice final were found inside a discarded kebab wrapper by a passing investigative reporter. The reporter - a well-known figure in the world of investigative journalism happened t...
Read full storyVilla, Silva and Xavi set to join Liverpool in shock transfer news
The beleaguered Liverpool boss Rafa Benitez from the luxury of his holiday on Menorca has revealed that the club is set to announce the transfers of some of the biggest stars in world football. "It's true we have control of the situation," Benitez...
Read full storyLewis Hamilton - Major Shock
Following his poor performance, producing another dismal result in last weekends Turkish Grand Prix, Lewis Hamilton has announced he may take legal action against the McLaren Formula One team for loss of charisma. Speaking through a Darth Vader vo...
Read full storySpoof Website Starts Full Frontal Nudity Offering In Its Daily Page!
Bowing to the economic pressures of the day the normally clean-as-a-Mormon-on-Sunday website The Spoof is starting to offer full frontal nudity on its screen. This is in an effort to keep up with its snail-news competitor that offers only half naked...
Read full storyBeards Banned In Boston and Baby-Faces Banned By Taliban.
At one time in Boston back in the day when Puritan ethics had not yet totally evaporated from the social consciousness, it was considered immoral to have a beard or any facial hair (one wonders how such Biblical heroes such as Moses, Jeremiah or even...
Read full storyObama Hints That Venezuela May Become The 51st State
CARACAS, Venezuela - President Barack Obama met with Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez about the possibility of Venezuela becoming the 51st state. President Obama was first approached with this unbelievable proposal back in December when he attende...
Read full storyOld White Men who Run the World Worried about Obama
The Board of Directors of the Old White Men who Run the World met this weekend in an undisclosed location known only to most of them. The only item on the agenda was Barack Obama. The following talking points were leaked to a bathroom attendant...
Read full storyFinally someone apologises to Pointer and My Response
> Dear Pointer, > > Please allow me to apologize for my conduct when we last met. I consider you to be one of my very closest friends and am embarrassed about my off the wall behavior. Perhaps the combination of Irish, Croatian and English genes and some very good wine got the best of me. Or maybe I was just being stupid. > > In any event, I ask you all to forgive me. I love...
Read full storyNBC Cancels The Tonight Show With Conan O'Brien
LOS ANGELES - In a move that caught a lot of people by surprise, NBC has canceled The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien after only one week. NBC President of West Coast Operations Gregory K. Quickowitz said that the premier show had a 7.1 rating. Th...
Read full storyBlind Valet Hangs Actor in Closet
Bangkok-Actor David Carradine thought nothing of it when he hired blind muscle builder Igor Slopsinsky (Slo-Pinsk-e)for his personal assistant. Helping those less fortunate came easily for the famous actor, who in the past has hired a vertically chal...
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