Farting Ban - Cameron Speaks Out
The Conservative leader David Cameron today slammed the government's ban on farting in public places.
Read full storyAishwarya Rai wants starring role in Bollywood version of Spoof! The Motion Picture
Mumbai - (Cinematographic Mess): Bollywood mega superstar and reincarnated global deity Aishwarya Rai has demanded to know why some relative newcomer like Rachel McAdams might be given first refusal to play a leading female role in the blockbuster mo...
Read full storySloshed in Space: Russians claim Soyuz cosmanauts drank NASA pilots under the table
Moscow - (Pissed Press): Not to be outdone in the current round of international drinking brinksmanship stakes Russian space agency officials refused to back down today over reports that their own cosmanauts 'drank NASA pilots like Commander Bill...
Read full storyWriter Sues To Move Production of Spoof! The Motion Picture From Hollywood To Bollywood
Who the Hell is Mohit?, a relatively new writer to the popular on line news magazine The Spoof, is suing the publication. He wants production of Spoof! The Motion Picture moved from Hollywood to Bollywood (Indian home of movie and television product...
Read full storyMagnificent George
George, lying in bed, cast a suspicious look around. He saw disfigured and out-of-proportion features of medics in Surgical Gowns, all staring down at him.
Read full storyWriter Sues Over Casting for The Spoof Movie
Spoof Chick Gail Farrelly is suing a Hollywood studio for attempting to cast one of the Farrelly brothers to play her in The Spoof movie.
Read full storyWorld to End Next Tuesday. Maybe.
Self-certified Apocalyptic Prediction Expert, Ed Davis, says he is 100% sure there's a 50% chance the world will end next Tuesday. If the Apocalypse does indeed occur next week, theorizes Mr. Davis, it will either be in the form of a giant meteo...
Read full storyJapanese Prime Minister Shinto suffers penis injury
TOKYO, Japan (Rooters) -- Japanese Prime Minister Shinto suffered a devastating penis injury in his house on Sunday, a result that could well force Abe to quit having sex and paralyze his penis.
Read full storyAndy Roddick Lets Connors Go, Hires Donny Osmond as New Coach
Just hours after losing a close semi-final in Indianapolis, Andy Roddick announced his latest coaching change.
Read full storyTarantino 'tempted' to direct Spoof! The Motion Picture
Hollywood, California - (Ass Mess): Quentin Tarantino is said to be very tempted to take on the challenge of directing the forthcoming Hollywood blockbuister Spoof! The Movie ahead of reports that contractual clauses stipulate the director m...
Read full storySo who owns Long Island, Mr Bush?
Washington DC - (Ass Mess): White House officials were utterly stumped this weekend after realising that the President has been kept in blissful arrogance about the legal ownership of Long Island along with other top US land assets which the GOP has...
Read full storyTransformer iPods turn into Robo-Pimps to pleasure Japanese women
Tokyo, Japan - Not just for your listening pleasure anymore. Now your iPod can be retrofitted with a special kit to turn it into an adult sex toy for her to enjoy: 'It's Saturday night. All her girlfriends are out with their boyfriends while...
Read full storyTomorrow's Full Moon Ushers in Disaster for Bush-Brown Summit
Camp David, Maryland - (Disaster Press): Confidence is at an all time high in the world of astrological prediction that tomorrow's Full Moon in the sign of the water-carrier Aquarius which opposes the majestic Sun in Leo will see the damning end...
Read full storyAnt Sole Survivor of Massacre By 8-Year-Olds
MANASSAS, VA. (Heewack News Network) -- Just one ant survived a vicious massacre allegedly perpetrated by two eight-year-olds at a playground in this former Civil War city.
Read full storyNicole Richie and Lindsay Lohan Seek Vagina Monologue While Sharing Jail Cell
Nicole Richie is awaiting a short prison sentence for DWI. Lindsay Lohan is awaiting a couple of court dates for multiple DWI's and posession of cocaine (whether or not she was in someone else's pants). The two Hollywood starlets have petitioned Ju...
Read full storyRepublicans too Good for Debate Created by the American People
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - "The Internets" - The YouTube debates have been called the debates created by the American people. That would be "The People" described in the Declaration of Independence. That is who our "elected&quo...
Read full storyNews Helicopters' Collision Blamed on Car Chase Suspect and not Pilot Error
Phoenix, Arizona (Kazinform, Kazakhstan Staff Writer) - The blame for two news helicopters colliding on Friday has been placed squarely on the man being chased on the ground by police, rather than pilot error.
Read full storyCheese wheel attacks man
St.Louis, Mo. - (Rooters) Shocking news coming out of St. Louis, Mo. this evening, where a man has been attacked by wheel of cheese.
Read full storyMick Hucknall's Ventriloquist Discovered
Simply Red's vocalist Mick Hucknall has been using a ventriloquist for years, it was claimed last night.
Read full storyPuppy Swirl Cookies Cause Rotting Tooth and Hoof Disease
A shocking new study published in the U.K. Journal of English Medicine revealed that a popular cow pasture treat may very well be at the root of a disease that has plagued the European population for centuries.
Read full storyTexas Invents "Outdoor" Plumbing
In the old days "indoor" plumbing was all the rage. Neighborhood hoodlums tipped over outhouses, sometimes with people still inside. This trend eventually led to the end of those days of trodding out on cold winter nights, but in a southwes...
Read full storyCharlton Heston Mocks Barry Bonds
SAN FRANCISCO (Lumberg) - Actor Charlton Heston mocked Barry Bonds on Saturday, announcing that the San Francisco Giants hitter can have Hank Aaron's career home run record only by prying it "from my cold, dead hands".
Read full storyBush stands firm in oily deaths
George Bush is dead against bringing the troops home until the Middle East can stand on its own. Or until every drip of their oil is in the U.S. which ever comes first.
Read full storyBuy our product or you will die!
We are a country dominated by fear. I just watched a TV commercial for ADT Security Systems. The commercial portrays a hapless victim describing how thieves had broken into his home and stolen all his merchandise. Then he spoke about what could have happened if he and his wife were home! At this point the viewer is forced to imagine some horrific scene of extreme bloodshed and mayhem! If we d...
Read full storySatan Hires Hollywood Publicist
(Hollywood) - High powered Hollywood publicist, Lotta Crappe, announced today that she is the new spokesperson for Satan, aka the devil, Beezlebub, the Prince of Darkness.
Read full storyGeneral Motors Introduces New SUV
In an attempt to compete with high quality Japanese cars and to provide consumers with a competitive edge in road rage incidents, General Motors unveiled the 2008 Road Warrior.
Read full storyComputer cracks Da Vinci Code; refuses to reveal secret
Rome, Italy - Computer analyst, Slavisa Pesci, claims to have broken the Da Vinci Code using highly sophisticated computer program software, which he designed especially for a supercomputer located in the moistened catacombs deep under Vatican City.
Read full storyGeorge W.Bush: "The United States owns the moon"
Washington D.C. (Rooters) President of the United States George W.Bush told reporters aboard Air Force One that he believes that the United States owns the moon and other planets in the solar system.
Read full storyNew Prime Minister Gordon Brown Heads To U.S. to Meet President Bush
New British Prime Minister Gordon Brown leaves London Sunday for an historic first official meeting with United States President George W. Bush. The two will have talks at Camp David, the official presidential retreat in the mountains.
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