Susan Boyle is still a virgin
Susan Boyle has never been able to copulate with a man and after visiting the doctor she was told why. She was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome which prevents her from becoming sexually aggressive with men. The diseases is a mild form of autism...Read full story
SuBo Fanatics To Hold Wild Haggis Hunt
Contrary to popular belief, the Wild Haggis (Haggis scoticus) is neither a mythical creature nor extinct. Although nearly hunted to the verge of extinction, a colony of this shy and reclusive creature has retreated to the banks of the River Almond a...Read full story
Susan Boyle has offered Queen Elizabeth a special gown for the wedding
Susan Boyle has offered Queen Elizabeth a special gown to wear at Wills's and Kate's April wedding. Susan has kindly offered the Queen the gold dress SHE wore at her April '09 BGT audition. She said that it brought her luck and thinks it would be ideal for Queen Elizabeth and, more importantly, it will save the country a few quid. Naturally the famous dress has been dry-cleaned and is hangi...Read full story
Is Susan Boyle The Late Peter Boyle's Sister?
That's the question going around both Britain and the United States because of her uncanny resemblance to the late actor! Although Peter Boyle, famous for his role on the TV hit show "Everybody Loves Raymond" and who died two years ago, was listed...Read full story
Britain's Got Talent singer, Susan Boyle announces engagement to Mel Gibson
Recently hired agent for talent show favourite, Susan Boyle has announced today that the Scottish singer has accepted a proposal of marriage from Mel Gibson. Gibson, whose wife recently filed for divorce, is now rumoured to have wooed Boyle, with...Read full story
Paul Potts lends advice to Susan Boyle
With the release of Susan Boyle's second big hit "Cry Me a River", her potential seems boundless. We talked with the golden voiced spinster about her future and her relationship with former BGT discovery Paul Potts. Susan Boyle may have found a me...Read full story
Susan Boyle tossed off BGT
Overnight sensation Susan Boyle was ruled ineligible to continue in the Britain's Got Talent television show after it was learned that she was paid for her work on a charity CD. Boyle sang Cry Me a River on a 1998 CD to benefit the Foundation for...Read full story
Susan Boyle to sing to the Pope wearing Turin Shroud dress!
The Pope, has shocked the Vatican, by ordering Susan Boyle to sing for him and the Turin Shroud fashioned into her Evening Gown. The Pope ordered his minions to his Papal bed after having a bright idea, like goggled-eyed Velma Dinkley does in 'Sc...Read full story
Susan Boyle: A slumdog from Britain
Remember Danny Boyle, the director of Slumdog Millionaire who made the movie for Oscar and won 8 award. There is another Boyle in making. In the show "Britain Got Talent", Susan trumped everyone to win the hearts and soul of every audience present th...Read full story
Superbowl offer their half-time spectacular to the FA Cup Final!
Jaggedone's CIA (Cocroach Infiltration Army) have just received exciting news from the Superbowl! Superbowl have offered their half-time entertainment services to England for the FA Cup Final in May! The FA Cup Final quite a drab affair is to be '...Read full story
Brownian Motion Disproved
Every schoolchild will have, at some time, been shown Brownian Motion. Those little specks or motes dancing around on the surface of a liquid or even floating in the air. The original explanation was that jostling atoms are knocking these motes, c...Read full story
David Gilmour Sacks Susan Boyle From Pink Floyd
As quick as it began, it's all over! - That was the message this lunchtime, as Pink Floyd guitarist David Gilmour sensationally sacked the former Britain's Got Talent loser Susan Boyle just days after the pair announced their extraordinary collaborat...Read full story
Gilmour - Boyle "Pink" Link Back On!
What is it with Susan Boyle anyway? We thought she learned her lesson the last time she chatted up potential wedding plans without a rock on her finger from boyfriend Paul Gadd. According to my extremely dodgy sources, the grey/blonde singer is...Read full story
Simon Cowell to give Susan Boyle the boot; adds Bikini elimination round to "Britain's Got Talent"
London, England - Clearly threatened by the homely dowdy looks of Susan Boyle, whose talent bares witnesses to the existence of inner beauty, Simon Cowell the creator of "Britain's Got Talent" has surprised everyone when he announced today that he is...Read full story
John Lennon and George turn in their graves as Susan Boyle is announced as the UK's top, pop artist!
Susan Boyle has just been announced as the UK's top, pop artist and no other UK artist or group can even "lick her pussy in boots" (Who'd want to?). This shocking news had ex-Beatles John & George turning in their graves and Paul & Ringo re-r...Read full story
Susan Boyle to be contestant on "Dancing With The Stars"
Susan Boyle has, we heard recently from a very reliable source, expressed her desire to be on the reality show, 'Dancing With The Stars'. When interviewed recently she is reported to have commented, "Och aye. Tis troo. A want te be on Dancin'...Read full story
Boyle: Don't miss the point of kissing!
Susan Boyle, after a week in which she received several offers of a first kiss and gave "no comment" about whether she had yet received one, has finally spoken. "Aren't people missing the point of kissing? If I wanted to be kissed so badly I could...Read full story
Susan Boyle Vagina Pics Ignored By Internet Surfers
Pictures posted on the internet showing the vagina of Britain's Got Talent superstar Susan Boyle, have largely been ignored by fans, it's been reported. The photos, showing a dry, hairy, grey clam with myriad folds of flabby white skin, have drawn...Read full story