Funny story: Susan Boyle is still a virgin

Susan Boyle is still a virgin

Susan Boyle has never been able to copulate with a man and after visiting the doctor she was told why. She was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome which prevents her from becoming sexually aggressive with men. The diseases is a mild form of autism...

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Funny story: SuBo Fanatics To Hold Wild Haggis Hunt

SuBo Fanatics To Hold Wild Haggis Hunt

Contrary to popular belief, the Wild Haggis (Haggis scoticus) is neither a mythical creature nor extinct. Although nearly hunted to the verge of extinction, a colony of this shy and reclusive creature has retreated to the banks of the River Almond a...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle throws a cat in a bin

Susan Boyle throws a cat in a bin

Crazy Celtic crooner Susan Boyle found herself in hot water today after she was caught on CCTV throwing a cat into a wheelie bin. SuBo was filmed walking past a house in Coventry when she stopped to stroke a tabby cat. Then after checking if anyon...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle has offered Queen Elizabeth a special gown for the wedding

Susan Boyle has offered Queen Elizabeth a special gown for the wedding

Susan Boyle has offered Queen Elizabeth a special gown to wear at Wills's and Kate's April wedding. Susan has kindly offered the Queen the gold dress SHE wore at her April '09 BGT audition. She said that it brought her luck and thinks it would be ideal for Queen Elizabeth and, more importantly, it will save the country a few quid. Naturally the famous dress has been dry-cleaned and is hangi...

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Funny story: Larry King Interviews Susan Boyle

Larry King Interviews Susan Boyle

LOS ANGELES - CNN talk show host Larry King recently interviewed Scottish songtress Susan Boyle, whom many felt was a virtual shoe-in to win Britain's Got Talent. But alas it was not to be as she came in second behind the all-male dance troupe Diversity. LARRY: Hello Susan. You're looking spiffy. SUSAN: Thank you Mr. King and you look somewhat dashing yourself. LARRY: Thank you. You can c...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle to sing "Flower of Scotland" for the Pope

Susan Boyle to sing "Flower of Scotland" for the Pope

If he can escape the damning evidence of unacceptable behaviour by his underlings in the Church, Pope Benedict will visit Glasgow, Scotland in September. One of the highlights of his visit will be a performance, in front of 150,000 by the Scottish...

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Funny story: Piers Morgan Poses Nude - Susan Boyle Goes Batty

Piers Morgan Poses Nude - Susan Boyle Goes Batty

London, UK - Irresistably studly Britain's Got Talent judge, Piers Morgan, has revealed himself naked with only a towel covering his nether lands and a gold medallion on a chain hanging from his neck; all of this as a result of an advertising campaig...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle Fans Wage Networking War On Twilight Fans

Susan Boyle Fans Wage Networking War On Twilight Fans

Internet users yesterday could barely believe their own eyes as virtually every social networking site on the net became jammed with messages which reduced the world wide web to a virtual battleground. It remains unclear where the conflict began,...

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Funny story: Piers Morgan May Be Man With World's Largest Penis, Confirms Amanda Holden

Piers Morgan May Be Man With World's Largest Penis, Confirms Amanda Holden

LONDON, U.K. - The Nightly Mirror has obtained an exclusive photo indicating its owner may very well be the man with the world's largest penis, though an official measurement has not yet been taken. The person in the photo? Piers Morgan! The ast...

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Funny story: Is Susan Boyle The Late Peter Boyle's Sister?

Is Susan Boyle The Late Peter Boyle's Sister?

That's the question going around both Britain and the United States because of her uncanny resemblance to the late actor! Although Peter Boyle, famous for his role on the TV hit show "Everybody Loves Raymond" and who died two years ago, was listed...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle Comes In Second Again As Scottie Sadie Wins At Madison Square Garden

Susan Boyle Comes In Second Again As Scottie Sadie Wins At Madison Square Garden

Susan Boyle was in tears once again as the Madison Square Garden judges gave the number one dog trophy to a fellow Scot, Sadie! "This is the second biggest heartache of my life, after losing on Britain's Got Talent", she told reporters outside.

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Funny story: "I ain't fat, I'm pregnant!" - Susan Boyle names Jade Goody widower as babyfather

"I ain't fat, I'm pregnant!" - Susan Boyle names Jade Goody widower as babyfather

London - (Incestuous Mess): Any day now a rumored Boyle/Weed chimaera is due to burst forth from its toxic amniotic sac, making the recent Goody/Weed nuptials totally irrelevant in retrospect. That's this week's LA FagHagSlagMag's lead story which...

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Funny story: Subo Attacked By Man With Foot Fetish!

Subo Attacked By Man With Foot Fetish!

Singer Susan Boyle told police in London that she had been attacked by a man with a foot fetish backstage after a recent performance there. "I was going to my dressing room and it was late because of several encores so there weren't as many people...

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Funny story: Subo fanatics go to great lengths - even getting plastic surgery to look more like their idol

Subo fanatics go to great lengths - even getting plastic surgery to look more like their idol

I have a lot to thank Subo and her fanatics for. I have just looked back over òld stories....to find that the Subo stories received the most ratings of any others I have written. Thank you Susan - thank you all you red scarved fanatics. I couldn't have done it without you. I hear the true fanatics are all still going at it too. Many have actually had plastic surgery to make them look mo...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle to sing at The Priory Clinic, London

Susan Boyle to sing at The Priory Clinic, London

Susan Boyle has accepted a recent invitation to sing at The Priory Clinic in London. Susan has agreed on one condition, that the Red Scarf Fanatics, residing there at present, are heavily sedated for the duration of her visit. The mini-concer...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle to marry Shrek's cousin

Susan Boyle to marry Shrek's cousin

Susan Boyle is to marry Shrek's cousin, the Hulk, this December. Publicity spokeswoman for Susan Boyle says the two have been dating for the last four months. The Hulk says in an interview, where he moans and groans, he has been wanting kids for...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle Boiling Mad Subdued By London Bobbies

Susan Boyle Boiling Mad Subdued By London Bobbies

LONDON - The odds-on favorite to win Britain's Got Talent 48-year-old Susan Boyle lost her temper and launched into a four-letter diatribe that makes Christian Bale's tongue-lashing tirade pale by comparison. It seems that Boyle was sitting in the...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle likes to dress up as Rab C Nesbitt's Mary Doll

Susan Boyle likes to dress up as Rab C Nesbitt's Mary Doll

Susan Boyle likes to dress up as Mary Doll the long suffering wife of the man with the string vest Rab C Nesbitt. Subo confessed that like Mary Doll, on the day she was born it was a toss-up whether she or the dog's litter would end up at the bott...

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Funny story: Kristen Stewart Threatens To Batter Susan Boyle

Kristen Stewart Threatens To Batter Susan Boyle

Robert Pattinson went and put his big size 12s in it good and blinkin' proper when he told Kristen Stewart that he thought Susan Boyle had the voice of an angel and that she was probably a really nice lady once you get to know her. Kristen Stewar...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle meets Takwana Smith and Anitakapita Jones from Cargo Fleet at an Icelands Shop in Middlesbrough

Susan Boyle meets Takwana Smith and Anitakapita Jones from Cargo Fleet at an Icelands Shop in Middlesbrough

Susan Boyle is doing her best to help out the Iceland Franchises. Yesterday she visited a branch of Iceland in Middlesbrough. The shop happened to be the branch where Takwana Smith and Anitakapita Brown do their main shopping. Iceland shops were...

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