Tiger Woods - "I Found Love In Susan Boyle's Breasts"

Funny story written by Aisubeki Akiudo

Tuesday, 15 December 2009

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Ebony & Ivory, Live together in perfect HAR-moneee

(Defecated News) Times recently have been very hard for golfing legend Tiger Woods. The world was worried after his shit, womanly driving caused him to drive into a pole, and smash his face in. Nobody had any idea about what story was to unfold as a result of this incident.

Woman after woman has come out to be counted as an alleged lover of Tiger Woods. TV interviews, magazine and newspaper double-paged spreads - they've told their side and his marriage now looks doomed & beyond repair.

In a strange twist, Tiger seems to have found comfort in a new set of breasts - those of Scottish Singer Susan Boyle.

Close friends of Woods say that Tiger has found a soul mate in Boyle, both of whom have been in the public eye and have had criticism thrown at them - one for being a man-whore, then other for being a minger.

"Tiger enjoys the company of Susan, and the two have generated a bond which is very special. Tiger feels nurtured and safe in her breasts", explained family pastor Reverend Willie Wanker.

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