Republicans, Quit Picking On Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
Republicans, quit picking on Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. It’s just another failed attempt to pick on women smarter and sharper than you, in an effort to silence the little lady who belongs back in the kitchen whipping up your grits, clean...
Read full storyElectoral College Electors Hiding Out From Democratic Assassins Because of 2016 Election
Life is not easy for any of the 538 Electors from the 2016 election. Too many people with good memories remember very well the outcome of that election BECAUSE OF the outcome of that election. The trouble can well be stated in one word that begins wi...
Read full storyJamal Khashoggi, Lord Lucan, Shergar, MH370 Airliner Etc All Suspected Of Hiding In Ecuador Embassy Alongside Julian Assange
London, UK - (Houdini Mess): Armed cops have surrounded Ecuador’s UK embassy where Wikileaks founder Julian Assange is holed up in a cat piss-soaked basement awaiting extradition to the United Snakes. The 69 year-old fugitive continues to brazen...
Read full storyAspiring Novelist Encouraged by Polite Rejections He's Received
While aspiring novelist Nate Hanson of Tulsa, Oklahoma, hasn't - yet - found any takers for the "modern-day great American novel" he spent over a decade writing, he is heartened and deeply encouraged by the plethora of extremely civil rejections he'...
Read full storyLatest AI Voice Recognition Software Released ( err we think...)
The following was found stapled to the back of a pizza box after a takeaway order for large vindaloo and chips went tragically wrong. Being written in crayon and covered in curry sauce we think it could be from one of our technology correspondent...
Read full storyScreaming, Crying, Throwing An Intensely Psychotic Fit, And Drinking Heavily Seen As Possible Methods For Getting Through Writer's Block
Wisconsin. The results of a state-wide survey conducted by numerous academic departments within the University-Of-Wisconsin System, indicated that throwing a massive and psychotic fit, screaming at the Moon, crying intensely, and drinking hard liquo...
Read full storyThis Week's News From Pakistan
(Pakistan News Sources) It is with great pleasure that we introduce and bring to you in your glorious western homes, the very interesting news from Pakistan, a forward-thinking society with outdated, insane Muslim values. A woman who had her head...
Read full storyMueller Doubts Unredacted Report Leaked
Washington, D. C. In a sharp response to a reporter's question regarding an alleged leak of his report on Trump's connections with the Russians in 2016, special counsel Robert Mueller vigorously denied that Etaoin Shrdlu or anyone else could have rel...
Read full storyWilliam Barr Issues New Four Page Summary; Rules that U.S. is Legally "Still a Monarchy"
Washington - Attorney General William Barr has determined that the Constitutional Democracy envisioned by the founding fathers was "fatally misconceived" and thus illegal, and has ruled that the United States must return to a monarchy form of governm...
Read full story