Affluent Homelessness on the Rise
More people are drawn to living a life of offensive mockery. Many are not just affluent, they're ultra-wealthy and choose to live a life of pseudo-homelessness. They keep fewer possessions and decide to share more of what they do own with others.
Read full storyNeural Implant that Could Translate Brain Activity in Stupid People
Most humble, open-minded people can not only communicate with well-structured sentences, but also with gestures such as subtle eye movements. Then, there are those individuals who are arrogant and stupid-ass. They can't read any subtle gestures, l...
Read full storyBidet Runs In 2020
Washington DC, US - (WetWipes Mess): Flushed with success from a 50-year career at the swampy end of the nation’s business, top DNC bullshitter Joe Bidet has announced his candidacy for the 2020 presidential election. It will be his turd - uh, thi...
Read full storyFad Dieter Disappointed to Learn that Fasting Just Means Not Eating
Health-conscious Krista Martin of Charleston, South Carolina, was intrigued by all the chatter in health clubs regarding the supposed benefits of water fasting, until, to her disappointment, she learned that “fasting” simply meant not eating. “Tal...
Read full storyMan Yawns, Burps, Farts And Sneezes All At The Same Time!
There were extraordinary scenes at a New York subway station this week, when one man's 'bodily functions' decided to gang-up against him, and release themselves upon his person all at once. The man, whose exact identity isn't known, was standing...
Read full storyFirst Black Hole Contains Second Black Hole
Scientists analyzing photographs sent back to Earth from the Event Horizon Telescope, which was used to capture the very first images of a black hole, have said that there appears to be another black hole inside the first black hole. The original...
Read full storyMan's Daughter Fired Plastic Gun Relentlessly
There's nothing more annoying than kids, especially when they're being annoying, and so it was for one man this morning, as his daughter relentlessly wore down his patience by firing a noisy child's plastic gun at him whilst he was having his breakfa...
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