Adam Lambert & Clay Aiken Discovered In The Sack Together!
Brian Foreman, special friend of glitter singer Adam Lambert, threw a fit after finding Lambert in 'The Sack' together after Lambert called him to cancel their going to another restaurant together. "We had both our bouncers ready with all the yell...
Read full storyRobert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Cast Of Twilight Call A Truce From Practical Jokes
Apparently the cast of the Twilight movies have called a truce to all the joking and horsing around as they allowed reporters in this morning to announce that fact. "Robert Pattinson does not have a house being built in the image of Vlad (Dracula)...
Read full storySenator Harry Reid To Debate Empty Chair
Nevada senatorial incumbent Harry Reid has decided to hold one last final debate, taking all questions, while standing next to an empty chair. In the final days of the 2010 Congressional Election Campaign with poll numbers close, his opponent, Sharro...
Read full storyBelow Decks - "Hebrides And Haemorrhoids" - The Cook's Journey
I don't really know what I'm doing right now. Somebody just woke me up and asked me how I'm feeling. Not great, to be totally honest. I mean, who would be, in my situation? I got meself roped into this pirate adventure, lured in there by the evil Captain Morse, and the notorious Pompey Lil. It was tough. We got sunk, I got fired out of the Nautilus by Captain Nemo and ended up with me...
Read full storyFailed underpants bomb supremo Ibrahim Hassan Tali al-Asiri screws up bigtime
London - (Big Bang Theory): Last Xmas Day his controversial penile dysfunction cure failed to light up underpants bomber Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab's y-fronts. 289 Northwest Airlines Flight 253 passengers were spared from a fatal splattering of Ab...
Read full storyCousin Ibrahim's bombing spree rattles Cameron
London - (Big Bang Theory 2): The National Poisons Unit DNA test's a shocker and leaves Prime Monster Cameron shitting bricks this weekend. "Bloody Sordid Arabian relatives of yours, Dave," a breastfeeding Sam Cam moaned at lunchtime, "there'll be...
Read full storyPattinson arrested at Hollowe'en Party
Robert Pattinson and other fellow party goers, have been arrested during a Hallowe'en Party which Pattinson had thrown for his fellow Breaking Dawn cast and crew, and haven been taken in for questioning . Pattinson, dressed as his long-lost relative...
Read full storyColleen Rooney buys washing up bowl
Lovely Colleen Rooney and her hunky husband travelled down to B&Q in their personalised Range Rover last week, and after examining the discounted items for sale, they decided to buy a new washing up bowl. "It was like a dream come true" shrill...
Read full storyObama to meet Osama?!
It does not mean the title of some sensational fictional story. It is true - the US President Mr. Barak Obama is to meet Osama Bin Laden when he visits Pakistan ! This is of course not any official meeting but it has been arranged by a beleaguered Pa...
Read full storyNigella Lawson Burns Left Nipple In Chicken Noodle Soup Mishap
Unconfirmed reports are coming in to the Skoob Entertainment News office, that Nigella Lawson, the TV chef with the big bazookas has been involved in an unfortunate kitchen mishap when her left nipple became scalded as she bent over a pan of hot chi...
Read full storyX-Factor's Aiden Grimshaw Tops Ten Most Wanted List
A spokesman for the FBI, based in Quantico, Virginia, today told Skoob Entertainment News that Aiden Grimshaw, the pretty boy from Blackpool off the X-Factor has made the Bureau's Ten Most Wanted list, on the grounds that he shows every indication of...
Read full storyNani: "I No Cheat. Me Play To Whistle. Simples Innit"
Happy Harry Rednapp is just not his usual happy self today, as he and most Spurs fans seethe over Nani's controversial goal at Old Trafford on Saturday. The rising young Portuguese star was reviled by critics following a declined penalty appeal wh...
Read full storySaudi King Abdullah Saves US Synagogues from Yemen Halloween Attack
Oh the times they are a changin'. 65 years ago Germany committed the Holocaust. Today Germany and Israel are best friends. Two boxers slug it out for 15 rounds, beating each other's heads and eyes into a bloody pulp. After the fight the boys hug in t...
Read full storyPatriotic Brits Start Grass Roots Movement to Reactivate HMS Warrior to Protect Realm in Face of Defense Cuts!
In an outpouring of patriotic pride of historical proportions, now credited to the Cousin's Tea Party Movement, thousands of 'ordinary citizens' have founded and contributed to, a movement to re commission the HMS Warrior as a response to the latest...
Read full storyCharles divorce latest: Camilla 'dismembered and ate all five previous husbands' shock horror
London - (Prenup Mess): Prince Charles fears for his life after discovering Camilla's special dietary needs, a secret divorce arbitration panel has heard. Clarence House CCTV footage shows Camilla shapeshifting her way into a Goliath Turdeater Sp...
Read full storyLondon Games Shock! Defense Cuts Leads Coalition to Oursource Security to India!
Admitting that "I lied" about maintaining World Power Status, Coalition spokesman David Cameron said that recent defense cuts have made it 'all but impossible to guarantee the safety of the 2012 London Games." The shocking state of Britain's defe...
Read full storyX-Factor fan James Hewitt woo's Cheryl Cole, Prince Harry furious
According to 'sources', there is nothing James Hewitt likes more these days than to sit down on a Saturday evening and dribble at the television when Cheryl Cole is on. A close friend of Hewitt's revealed he has sent a number of emails to Cheryl's ma...
Read full storyMillions who purchased The Secret in 2006 now want refund
In what's being dubbed the "law of repulsion", millions of people who purchased best-selling author Rhonda Byrne's The Secret hoping to get rich by simply thinking about it, are now demanding refunds in the hope that they can use the money help pay b...
Read full storyHonduras most dangerous place on the planet to play "footie", it's real life or death!
It is now a fact, Honduras is the most dangerous place on the planet to play soccer! Teams turn up for their games with their boots, shirts, balls, etc, but never forget their revolvers, Kalasjnikovs and hand grenades. Before the kit men pack t...
Read full storyMillions go down with flu. Shopkeeper arrested
With millions of people in the UK falling ill with flu or stomach bugs, a Birmingham corner shopkeeper whose grandfather came from Pakistan has been arrested and charged with releasing germs into the atmosphere in the name of Allah. Zaffar Ali Kha...
Read full storyRasputin Joins the Cabinet (Part 2)
INorder to publise the addition of Rasputin to the Cabinet, David Cameron has agreed to a request by David Dimbleby to participate in question time in Siberia. The panel will include his good friend Boris Johnson, his not so good friend John Prescott plus special guest Secretary of State Hilary Clinton. Qustion time was held in the picturesque town of Omsk, Dimbleby welcome the media and the l...
Read full storyMichael Jackson Thriller comeback gig for Halloween
Michael Jackson is warming up, quite literally, for a massive comeback spooktacular and to perform his huge hit, Thriller, as it should be seen, with no make up required. Stars, celebs and quite a few famous people are all clamouring for tickets t...
Read full storyRasputin Joins Cabinet as Borderland Czar
It is official (the Queen has not heard though). Rasputin the well known diladante and black magic artist will join the British Cabinet in the post of Borderland Czar. He will report directly to David Cameron, thereby eliminating any leaks going to...
Read full storyPosh misses out on Melbourne Cup run
Victoria Beckham, aka Posh, has missed out on a wild card entry in the Melbourne Cup. Posh is due to accompany hubby David, when he goes downunder next month. He will play in an exhibition game between his club, LA Galaxy, and an Australian outfit...
Read full storyOh shit...here come those bloody colonials again
After watching an awesome display of powerful, fast, dynamic and highly skillful rugby by the Wallabies and All Blacks last night, English rugby manager Boris Johnstone looked less than confident. Johnstone, in fact, had taken on a deathly pallor...
Read full storyObama Picks Major Amos B. Hoople As Chairman Of Joint Chiefs Of Staff
President Obama went deep into the ranks to pick a relatively unknown as Chairman of the Joint Chiefs Of Staff. Major Amos B. Hoople, known for his knack of expressing himself in non-traditional military ways; such as saying "Egad fap, cough, wheeze...
Read full storyRecords Reveal Heaven Outsourced Infestation Job to Bed Bugs
Even Heaven is on a budget. Wrought-iron pearly gates have been replaced by baby safety fences. The walls of precious gems have been substituted with hip hop iced out jewelry. And swarms of locusts have been reduced to by-stander status as Heaven a...
Read full storySelfish A--holes at News Corp., Cablevision Reach Agreement
Mere moments before every paying Cablevision customer in Philadelphia, New York and New Jersey said "f--k you " and ordered Verizon Fios, Cablevision Systems Corp. and Fox Networks reached an agreement ending a two-week stalemate marked by both compa...
Read full storyChapter 23 - Maj. Gen. Jaggedone's Quest
"Come along now!" Maj. Gen. Jaggedone shouted as his band of irregulars waded ashore gasping. "We have much work to do to seek out and find the Great Somnambulist of Lancashire, we must not tarry in our quest." Veterans Captain Morse and Private Birbee nodded gravely to each other in agreement and cried back in one voice. "You can be sure that we will follow you Gen. Maj. Jaggedone as you...
Read full storyLatest Rooney Outrage: Incorporates Himself, Saves 22% in Taxes!
Saying 'from now on just call me "Inc",' $320K a week "lover" Wayne Rooney announced his name change at a press conference at a local high end exotic car dealership where he was 'window shopping." "Wayne Inc has a certain ring to it," said the smi...
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