Saudi King Abdullah Saves US Synagogues from Yemen Halloween Attack

Funny story written by Karen Fish

Sunday, 31 October 2010


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Oh the times they are a changin'. 65 years ago Germany committed the Holocaust. Today Germany and Israel are best friends. Two boxers slug it out for 15 rounds, beating each other's heads and eyes into a bloody pulp. After the fight the boys hug in the center of the ring like Anna Nicole Smith and Howard K. Stern. The saving of the Chicago Synagogues by Saudi King Abdullah was a stern warning to Mahmoud Ahmadinejad that the United States of America, Saudi Arabia, the moderate Arab League and Israel are coming to get him.

Sex and violence sell. When a bomb is found inside of a Hewlett Packard Deskjet Printer the world media is all over it like Devon James on Teneal Goyco. The newspapers do not report, "Empire State Building Was Not Blown Up Today." When the United Nations created the annual World Interfaith Harmony Week last week the only newspaper to report it was the Allahu Akbar Elementary School Post in Amman.

A wave of peace is sweeping the world and the newspapers shun it because peace doesn't sell newspapers. Sex and violence sell newspapers. Did you know that Saudi King Abdullah held a world interfaith meeting in Madrid? Did you know that Jordan's King Abdullah and Jordan's Prince Ghazi have been holding world interfaith meetings at the Vatican with Pope Benedict, the Archbishop of Canterbury and the Chief Rabbi of Israel?

The reason that you did not know is because the world media is owned by Hoffmann La Roche, the makers of valium. The papers try to scare the Halloween Hell out of us non stop to increase sales of valium. Anna Nicole Smith and Michael Jackson recently died from taking too much valium. Reporting on peaceful wonderful life on earth saving events is bad for business. It's all about the bottom line and this is why Jesus overturned the tables of the money changers. Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country.

Halloween horror films are huge sellers. This week CNN has been all over the Yemen al Qaeda attempt to bomb two Chicago Synagogues into the dirt during Shabbat prayers yesterday morning. The keywords Chicago plane synagogue brings up images of 9/11, President Obama, Middle East conflict, mayoral hopeful Rambo Emanuel and fried salami. Is Chicago salami halal? Was this the motivation for the attack?

CNN throws non stop coverage of the Yemen Chicago Halloween Synagogue attack at us. CNN bombards us with different anchors, different experts, throwing days of 24 hour coverage at us, all of them repeating over and over and over and over again the same words that could be summarized in one paragraph because people eat it up. A mother and her 22 year old Yemeni engineering student daughter have been arrested for mailing the Hewlett Packard printers but the government and the media refuse to tell us their names. Why is that?

On Thursday night Saudi King Abdullah told his head of intelligence Mohammed bin Nayef to call John Brennan, our assistant for homeland security to tell him that there were bombs on the cargo planes and to tell him the UPS and FedEx tracking numbers of the packages. Last year al Qaeda bomb maker Ibrahim al Asiri hid a suicide bomb in the bum of his brother in a failed attempt to assasinate Saudi head of intelligence Mohammed bin Nayef. Last Christmas Al Qaeda bomb maker Ibrahim al Asiri put a bomb into the underwear of a young Nigerian on a trans Atlantic flight. Perhaps this particular area of the body is disrupting the detonating mechanisms. Mr. Assiri is a fetishest of the highest order.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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