Ahem! Terminal 5 'is not a hospice' Queen is told
London - (DaftAss Mess): It took a while before the penny dropped...
Read full storyAmerica's Bear Stearns goes bi-polar
Off-the-Wall-Street, NYC - (Rioters): Amid echoes of a return to the 1990s' dreaded bear-markets one of the USA's biggest investment banks Bear Stearns is on the verge of going belly-up today.
Read full storyMichael Jackson London lawsuit: CIA testifies Yoko Ono is Japanese Emperor Aki-Shit-Ho's sister
London - (Chrysanthemum Puppet Throne Mess): In a surprise legal move the CIA was finally successfully subpoenaed in the Bahraini Royal Princeling v Michael Jackson lawsuit in London today.
Read full storySurprise! Centenarian Dies at Own 100th Birthday Party
AKRON, OHIO - When the family of centenarian Jeremiah Toumrok planned a surprise party for his 100th birthday, they never expected the surprise would be on themselves!...
Read full storyGovernment To Reclassify U.K Broadband Services
The government has today revealed plans to reclassify Broadband services within the U.K to a more recognisable structure that will be more easily understood by the U.K consumer.
Read full storyParis Hilton Seeks New Best Friend Competition
Pointless airhead socialite Paris Hilton has today announced that she is seeking a new best friend, of the non-canine variety, who she can trust, swap clothes and tell girly secrets to.
Read full storyManhunt 2 - UK Release With Over 55 Rating Only
The hugely popular Manhunt 2 game is set to be released in the U.K over the next couple of weeks after gaining a special ruling from The Video Appeals Committee (VAC)that the game will only be sold to the over 55 years or above age group.
Read full storyElephant Forgets To Lock Back Door
A zookeeper at San Francisco zoo has been relating how all the animals have managed to secretly sneak and go on wild trips to Vegas each nite this month.
Read full storyBush Tucker Man arrested as al-Qaeda poison plot is foiled
George W. Bush's personal chef has been arrested in connection with a plot to poison the President's entire administration during a scheduled banquet at Camp David.
Read full storyShannon Matthews Was Just Having A Kip
Shannon Matthews, the 9-year-old little Yorkshire girl, who went missing three weeks ago after leaving school with a lot of homework, has this afternoon been found alive asleep. The schoolgirl from Dewsbury was discovered by eagle-eared police mak...
Read full storyAl Gore At New York Auto Show: "Global Warming, a bunch of hot air!"
(New York-NY) Visitors to the New York Auto Show got more than their share of pimped out rides to compensate for fear of inadequate penis length and three thousand dollar rims spinning on five hundred dollar cars. Al Gore, crusader a...
Read full storyTravelocity Gnome Banned from United Airlines Flights, "Lewd Behavior" cited
CHICAGO - Citing abuse of its Mileage Plus frequent flyer program, and on-board "lewd behavior", United Airlines (UA) indefinitely banned the Travelocity Gnome from its flights.
Read full storyControversial New Game Wins High Court Battle For Release
A High Court battle over the ban of a controversial new video game has ended with the ruling that the game is safe to play, as long as players don't take the killing, shooting, stabbing, dismemberment and
Read full storyMan on runway at Heathrow had merely missed his flight!
The major security incident yesterday at Heathrow, which resulted in the northern runway closed for 2 hours and many flights being cancelled, was nothing more than a man running after the plane that he'd missed.
Read full story"TheSpoof" to Shut Down for Two Weeks
The Editorial staff of "The Spoof" has decided to shut down its website for two weeks in July. It will be during the same two week span that Chrysler will shut its doors.
Read full storyRichard Gere Found 'Not Guilty' Of Obscenity, 'Guilty' Of Obscurity
The Indian Supreme Court has thrown out a legal case which accused has-been Hollywood actor Richard Gere of obscene behaviour, ruling instead, that he is not 'obscene' but &...
Read full storyFBI publishes Spitzer brothel client rankings numerology
Washington AC/DC - (Lurid Ass Mess): The FBI has issued the Emperor's Club VIP ranking tables that outed NY Gov Eliot Spitzer this week as 'Client No# 9/11'.
Read full storyCats May Have Killed Woman
A 72-year-old man who, police had alleged, confessed to his cats that he had bludgeoned his partner to death, has been cleared of murder after his defence lawyers claimed the cats did it.
Read full story'Cat confession' man not guilty; cats Twinkie and Pudsey charged with perjury, conspiracy
A 92-year-old man who confessed to his cats has been cleared of murder.
Read full storyConvert Fights Unclean Balls
It has been reported in the Iranian Independent (15th May 2007) that Mohammed Azeri (formally Frank Shuttleworth, now converted) has refused to bowl for Yorkshire's 'Wharfdale 2nd 11' as the leather that covers cricket balls cannot be guaranteed to h...
Read full storyIn-camera royal blackmail trial of plotters who outed Lord Levy's bastard son
London - (Lurid Ass Mess): The Crown Prosecution Service is being blackmailed to conduct an In-camera trial of two men accused of targeting a 'royal' figurine who is really the bastard son of notorious Labour WMD fantasist Lord Levy.
Read full storyBrave Kylie to go on World Tour of Bravery
Cancerous pint-sized Antipodean pop bint Kylie Minogue stunned fans yesterday as she announced dates for a new world tour to kick off this December, just in time to cynically fleece homosexuals and parents of pre-teen idiots everywhe...
Read full storyAmerican Idol Contestant Amanda Overmyer nude pictures surface
Scandals, Scandals, Scandals! It's more about the scandals on American Idol season 7 than it is about the singing.
Read full storyJohn McCain and Ehud Olmert Thank Mossad for 'Taking Down' Eliot Spitzer
WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - The Prime Minister of Israel Ehud Olmert and Republican Presidential candidate John McCain formally thanked Mossad for 'taking down' Eliot Spitzer on Friday.
Read full storyStrange, Yellow UFO Blinds Millions in USA
(Philadelphia PA) Scientists are still at a loss to explain the bizarre UFO seen in the nation's skies yesterday. The phenomenon was observed coast to coast. The UFO was described as shiny, and very bright with a yellowish colour. The phenomenon...
Read full storyDept. for Education Duped in Child Sex Abuse Case
IN THE aftermath of the shock and horror expressed by politicians on both sides about the scandal of the abuse of children in Institutional Care, the most inane remark must be accredited to Taoiseach Eamon DeValera. Remember, the Child Abuse Commi...
Read full storyGingers For Justice
Ever since Catherine Tate's 'Gingers for Justice' campaign, there has been an increase of attacks on unsuspecting ginger.
Read full storyRoger Federer: I Want Pete Sampras' Babies! Britney's Dad is Right!
New York Terrier - After several exhibitions with his former childhood idol Pete Sampras, Roger Federer is beginning to sound and look like he has a crush on Pete.
Read full storyBilly Crystal ignores Yankee Coach's advice to step into the pitch path to get on first base; chooses to go down swinging instead
Tampa, Florida - Living out every man's childhood dream and minor-leaguer's reality to play on a major league baseball team, Billy Crystal turned it into a nightmare by striking out today. Not because he went down swinging or because he did n...
Read full storyNickFun's 100th Spoof story passes with little fanfare
Acclaimed spoof writer NickFun wrote his 100th spoof story with little fanfare from the media or from other Spoof writers, according to Mark Lowton, editor and sole proprietor of TheSpoof.com.
Read full storyTheSpoof.com - Your Home For World Class Snooker!
Snooker, a sport that nobody knows or cares about will be reported in meticulous detail on your spoof.com. Why? Who knows? Who cares? We're like snooker!...
Read full storySpoof Gets First Crack At MP's Published Expenses!
TheSpoof.com has scooped all dailies, weeklies and almanacs by printing the first unexpurgated list of the Members of Parliament's expense accounts. Hold on to your knickers and tie that French tickler in a knot, here it comes!...
Read full storySupreme's Diana Ross calls for Drug King's Extradition to US
BBC News reports: "Brazil's Supreme Court has authorised the extradition to the United States of an alleged leader of one of Colombia's most powerful drug cartels." All Day Sucker, Drug King Juan Carlos Ramirez Abada, alias "Ch...
Read full storyUS Couple Con Gullible British
A Father and daughter who set out to con stalwart British investors of their hard earned winnings, have been charged with countless counts of fraud in differing flavours, today.
Read full storyObama says: I'm Black and I'm Blind and I'm Proud!
In an unusual development in the Democandie Race, Race, BH Obama has revealed that like new NYS Governor superstar, Robertson he is a Black Blind Politician!...
Read full story25% of US Female Teens Diseased; First Evidence of Virgin STD's!
With 25% of US Female Teens infected with STD's most researchers expected to find significant numbers among US Teen Males.
Read full storyIndia rise to 3rd place in world rankings
It could be cricket or in neighbouring Pakistan it could be the amount of angry men with moustaches that can burn an American flag in front of one television camera, but neither is true.
Read full storyTop 5 Ways to Know You Wrote a Turd Story.
Here are the top 5 ways to know you wrote a turd story. Whether by accident or on purpose.
Read full storyObama Declares "War…is not My Favorite Thing" in effort to Combat Vagueness
GETTYSBURG - Confronting accusations of "vague-speak" and weak stands on issues, Barack Obama electrified a packed Gettysburg, PA arena yesterday. Boldly stating his position on Iraq, Obama declared "War, my friends, is not my favorite...
Read full storyRed Bull Flugtag Takes new Twist
Yesterday a man attempted the most convincing entry to the Red Bull Flugtag by running across the runway at Heathrow. Detectives called in to arrest the man are working on the theory that he was going to attempt to strap an Airbus 500 onto his back,...
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